Hanging on by a thread
by XxxAnimaniacxxX
Summary: PART 2: 'Life is full of obstacles. Sometimes it's better to face them dead on than to run away. At least, that's what I think, now.' Kames slash! Contains smut and Mpreg. For EvilGeniusBookWorm13! COMPLETE
1. Part 1: Chapter 1

**I WIN! Sorry, lol. I was just thinking about how much I've changed since I joined the website two years ago. There were two things I hated: slash and smut. Now I write them both! And then there was still one thing I hated; Mpregs. Now I'm writing one! While I was thinking of doing this for a while, when I saw the request on EvilGeniusBookWorm13's profile, I thought "OMG now I have to start it before anyone else does!" This first chapter was gonna be in Kames oneshots but I twisted it a little and morphed it into the first chapter of this! Enjoy!**

It made him _so_ mad.

Seeing those two sitting at a table together, drinking smoothies and chatting. His _stupid_ smirk, his hair in that _stupid_ style, his _stupid_ shirt with the collar turned up, and his eyes almost watching the other hungrily. He hated him _so_ much. Then there was his companion—who James's opinion of was completely different. His blonde bangs hanging across his forehead, his bright eyes, his smooth creamy skin, and that adorable smile with the dimple in his left cheek as he listened to the other one speak.

They were flirting; James could see that from his spot on a seat at the other side of the pool. Kendall Knight (the perfect one) and Jett Stetson (the stupid one that James wanted to stab with his lucky comb until he bled to death. Then he'd roll in his blood and laugh manically, not caring who heard him). Jett had moved to the Palmwoods about a month ago. He was the star of the latest teen drama show, New Town High (_stupid_ show), along with some girl called Jo Taylor. She'd done acting before and didn't live at Palmwoods, so James didn't know her. He'd hoped that Jett and his co-star might become an item, since he'd dated all of his past co-stars, even some guy he'd worked in a comedy with. However, he insisted that the two were just friends.

And now the jerk was sitting there flirting with _his_ Kendall. Totally unacceptable! James had known the younger boy longer; they'd been best friends since Kindergarten. James had loved Kendall the longest; he deserved him, and Jett did not. No way. Never. Kendall didn't like him either.

Did he?

As Kendall laughed and smiled at whatever witty comment Jett had made, James wondered. Maybe Kendall really did have a crush on the actor. Or maybe they were just friends. James was desperate to know, but he couldn't just flat out ask Kendall without sounding suspicious. He knew Kendall liked guys, so that was a start; he'd just randomly come out and told them last year. James had immediately become more hopeful, and had only wished he could have the courage to say he liked guys too, or more specifically, that he liked Kendall. But he hadn't. So he settled to sit and watch, looking for whatever signs he could. He saw Camille and Stephanie walking over and talking to them. Jett said something and wrapped an arm around Kendall's shoulders. He didn't pull away.

James gritted his teeth, making up his mind in an instant. He leaped to his feet and walked around the pool over to the group of four. "Hey guys! What's up?"

Although three of them smiled in greeting, Jett didn't seem too happy. James noticed the arm around Kendall's shoulders tensed a little. "Just talking about the movie Camille's gonna be in."

"I'm so excited!" Camille shrieked, bouncing on her toes. "Dak Zevon's gonna be in it too. I'm on my way to stardom at last!"

"That's great, Camille," James grinned. "I'm happy for you."

"Thanks!" While Camille taslked about her movie, Jett kept his arm around Kendall. James wanted to snap it in two.

That evening, he and Kendall were sitting on the couch, James on his laptop, Kendall reading a book. Then there was a knock on the door, and Kendall got up to answer it. Surprise, surprise, Jett was there.

"Hey," he grinned.

"Hi," Kendall smiled back. "What's up?"

"They're playing Terminator on TV. You wanna come watch it with me?" James mentally kicked himself. Jett was so confident. "I know it'd be easier to text you, but my phone's dead. So . . .?"

Kendall flashed a smile. "Sure." He turned to glance at James. "If Mom asks tell her I'll be back later, ok?"

James could only nod as they both left, shutting the door behind them. Kendall could've watched it here, with him. Maybe he was just being nice, keeping Jett company. James practically stomped into the room he and Kendall shared. He grabbed a fashion magazine and tried to read it, but he could only think about Kendall upstairs with that monster. Maybe he'd put his arm around him. Maybe Kendall would rest his head on his shoulder. Maybe they'd _kiss_—

James threw the magazine at the wall, growling at nothing.

He knew for sure that Jett liked Kendall. But he didn't know if Kendall liked Jett. It was so frustrating! He didn't think there was any point in talking to Logan or Carlos about it; they didn't even know he was in love with his best friend. It wouldn't occur to them. As he walked aimlessly around the lobby the next morning, Jett walked right up to him. "Hey, James," he sneered. "How you doing?"

"Fine until you showed up," James snapped. "What do you want?"

"I just wanted to apologise," Jett replied with a smile. "I know you and I haven't always hit it off, and I hope we can be friends."

"I'd never be friends with you!" James spat. "I wish you never came here! Then maybe me and—" He stopped, not wanting to say anything more, just in case.

Jett was smiling wider than ever. "Oh, James. You actually thought . . ." He shook his head in amusement. "You're so naive. Kendall's not interested in you, only me. He's always been mine." He paused. "Well, since last night, anyway."

James's eyes widened. "W-what are you talking about?"

"I think you know. After half an hour, that movie was totally forgotten. But I was entertained plenty, if you get what I mean."

"What did you do to him?" James hissed. His voice had almost died out. This couldn't be happening . . .

"He was pretty good, James. You've really missed out. You should've seen the way he screamed my name and writhed around underneath me when I—"

Jett didn't get to finish, because James had punched him right in the face. The sneer had vanished, replaced with an angry snarl and a bloody lip. "Mother fucker!"

Jett punched James back, but James was so angry he didn't even feel it. He punched the boy again, harder than the last time. And again. "You son of a bitch! You better not lay a finger on him again or I swear to God I'm gonna kill you!"

"Bit late to say that, Diamond! I've already touched him more than you _ever_ will!" They continued pounding each other, James shoving Jett on the ground before diving on top of him. People were watching, gently asking them to cool it, when someone appeared next to them, grabbing hold of James's wrist and pulling him to his knees, and off Jett. "James, what are you doing?"

James was caught off guard. "I . . . um . . ."

Kendall had turned to look at Jett. "Oh God, you're bleeding. Are you alright?"

Jett really was a good actor; he gave a sad smile, flinching a little as he got to his feet. "It's not that bad. You know James has never really liked me much."

Kendall turned back to James, eyes flaring. "So you decided to just punch him in the face? I can't believe you, James! You could've really hurt him—"

"It's just a scratch," Jett cut in. "Really, I'm ok. Though a kiss might make it better."

Kendall rolled his eyes, smiling. "C'mon, I'll help you out with that cut . . ."

Kendall led Jett away, not looking back at James once. James stood there for another second before hurrying upstairs to 2J. He slammed the door shut and threw himself face down on the couch. He felt relieved that everyone was out. He wanted to cry so badly, but the tears just wouldn't come. All the emotion he was feeling stayed bottled up. Kendall and Jett . . . he couldn't get that horrible image out of his head. Their bodies pressed together, Jett getting to do what James had dreamed of doing. He could practically picture them doing it right next to him on the couch. Oh God, why did he think of that? Now he really could see them there! And he could practically hear it too—

"_Nngh, Jett . . . __**harder**__ . . ."_

James's angry thoughts were interrupted when he heard the apartemtn door open. "James, we need to talk."

James turned to glare at him. "What?"

"What were you thiking, punching Jett like that? What did he ever do to you?"

"Oh, it's not about what I was thinking, it's about what you were thinking!"

Kendall looked confused. "Huh? What do you mean by that?"

James rolled his eyes. "Jett told me what you two did!" he practically snarled. "Seriously, what were you thinking? I thought you were smarter than that! Jett's just some self-absorbed idiot; he's not good enough for you, and yet you go and let him fuck you up the ass!" James stopped to catch his breath. Kendall was staring at him with wide eyes.

"Hold on. What exactly . . . he told you we had sex?"

James nodded, scowling. "Bragged about it, too."

Kendall rolled his eyes at the ceiling. "That's ridiculous. Me and Jett haven't slept together!"

"You haven't?" James sat up straighter. Ok, now he was confused. "So there was never any fucking? No groping, no making out, no nothing?"

"Not a thing. I don't know why he told you that." Kendall frowned thoughtfully. "But why do you care so much? I mean, you almost killed him over it."

James looked at the floor, blushing. "What do you mean? There's nothing—"

"I don't believe you, James!"

James rolled his eyes. "Fine. You want the truth? What do you want me to say?" James demanded. "I was pissed because he got you before I did! I knew he liked you and it made me so mad to think you liked him back because if you're gonna be with anyone it should be me! He'd never love you like I do; he doesn't appreciate you the way I do! He only thinks you're hot, which you are, but that's not the point! He doesn't appreciate that you're kind and funny and smart and just so amazing that you need someone who'll actually care for you, and he's not that person, Kendall! I am!"

James stopped to catch his breath, staring at Kendall. He realised he'd got to his feet during his ranting and they were now standing a few feet apart. Kendall looked at him with wide eyes. "Really? You mean that?"

"Of course I do!" James replied with a sigh.

James was surprised when Kendall smiled at him. "You should've said something before!" He paused, before taking a step closer to James. "And excuse the cheesiness, but that's the sweetest thing anybody's ever said to me." He laughed a little. "And the sweetest thing anyone's done for me. Although it was a little uncalled for—"

James rolled his eyes. "He had it coming to him." He looked at Kendall for a second. They were both standing in silence, staring at each other. Then James realised that Kendall was waiting for him to do something, say something else. He reached forward and brushed his thumb across Kendall's left cheek, smiling when Kendall leaned into the touch. Then he cupped the blonde's cheek with his hand, pulling him just a little bit closer. Then he kissed him. He heard the squeak Kendall let out as he fisted James's t-shirt, opening his mouth when he felt James's tongue graze against his bottom lip. Before they went any further, Kendall pulled back. "By the way, I never even knew Jett liked me. And I never liked him." Kendall paused, and James saw his cheeks flushing a little as he continued. "Actually, I thought it was pretty obvious I liked you."

James just gave him one long, blank look. Then he kissed him again. This time it was slower, more passionate. James's hands were gripping Kendall's hips and pressing their bodies together. James's tongue darted around inside Kendall's mouth, and when he heard the blonde give a small moan, he immediately felt himself growing in his pants. He couldn't help himself; his hands slid up from Kendall's hips to under his t-shirt, running his fingers over Kendall's stomach and chest, smirking faintly into the kiss as he felt the muscles tighten under his touch. He stopped when Kendall pulled back from the kiss again. "James . . ."

"Yeah?" James asked, hoping he wasn't doing anything wrong.

"Do you want me?"

James bit his lip, nodding. What was the point in lying? "So much."

"Then take me," Kendall murmured, kissing several spots on James's neck.

James was caught off guard. He tried not to sound too eager as he said, "Are you sure? I don't wanna rush you into anything—"

"I'm totally sure." Kendall smiled, hands gripping the hem of James's t-shirt. "So, you wanna go . . .?"

"Yeah." James grabbed Kendall by the hand and led him into their shared bedroom. Once they were inside the door, he had Kendall pinned up against it, sucking and biting at his neck. He chose one spot under his chin and kept at it, while he felt Kendall's hands fumbling with the buttons on his shirt. He pulled back from Kendall's neck to see a huge purple hickey on the spot he'd been assaulting. He grinned as Kendall kissed him again, pushing James's shirt off his shoulders and running his hands all over the brunette's defined chest and abs.

James lifted Kendall's shirt over his shoulders, the blonde lifting his arms up to make it a little easier for him. Once the shirt was gone, James pulled Kendall over to his bed, falling down with Kendall on top of him, their tongues battling for dominance as both boys' hands moved to take off the other's pants. They were flung into some far corner of the room, and then James's hand slipped inside Kendall's boxers, grabbing his erection as he flipped them both over.

Kendall gasped against James's mouth, just lying there as James began pumping his dick, his thumb stroking the tip, rubbing at the pre-cum beading there. James suddenly moved his lips back to Kendall's neck, and when Kendall suddenly felt a bite on his collarbone, he lost it, coming all over James's hand.

James grinned down at Kendall's flushed face. "You liked that, didn't you?"

Kendall resisted the urge to roll his eyes and flipped them again, yanking James's boxers off. Before the brunette could say or do anything, Kendall had taken his whole cock in his mouth. James let out a long moan, back arching as Kendall ran his tongue along the slit and along the underside of his dick, his hands moving to James's hips as he sucked it harder. James tangled his hands in Kendall's soft hair, panting out his name as he felt himself getting closer and closer to orgasm.

Then, on impulse, he pulled Kendall off his dick. Kendall looked at him with a both confused and innocent expression. James just beckoned him over. Kendall crawled over next to him. "What?"

James got up and headed towards the other side of the room, digging around in his locker until he found his bottle of lube. He hurried back over and crawled over Kendall, propping his legs over his shoulders. "This . . . this might hurt a little, ok?"

Kendall nodded, looking slightly nervous. "Ok. Just go ahead."

James opened the bottle and squeezed lube out over his fingers and rubbed it over Kendall's entrance. Then he took a deep breath and stuck his pointer finger inside the blonde. Kendall yelped, his hands fisting the sheets desperately as he started breathing unevenly. "Nngh . . ."

"You alright?" James asked, concerned. When Kendall nodded, he eased a second finger inside, circling them around and slowly stretching him. Kendall was panting, his eyes squeezed shut at the stinging sensation running all the way though his body. After a minute or so, it almost felt kind of good. He opened his eyes and saw James looking down at him, love evident on his face. He couldn't help smiling. "I'm ok now."

"You sure?"

"Yes." Kendall gulped as he watched James cover his dick with lube; suddenly he wasn't so confident anymore. He let his head rest back on the pillow, waiting nervously.

James lined himself up in front of the blonde's entrance and started to enter him. He heard Kendall cry out in pain and froze, feeling sickened that he'd caused it. "Kendall, baby?" He had no idea where the 'baby' part had come from, but somehow it sounded right.

Kendall's eyes were wide, his chest rising and falling erratically as his face contorted with pain. His eyes met James's for a second before they drifted away again. "M-move," he managed to stutter out.

James pushed in further until he was completely buried inside Kendall, and then stopped. Kendall was so tight and warm inside, it felt amazing. But he didn't move. "Just g-give me a second, ok James?" Kendall stuttered, eyes meeting James's as the brunette kissed him gently.

"Of course. Just tell me when you're ready."

Kendall nodded and lay there, breathing slowly and deeply until he felt the burning feeling slowly dull into pleasure. He took another deep breath. "Okay, move."

James pulled out slowly and then pushed back in. He froze when he heard a growl coming from the blonde. "Kendall?"

"You're going too damn slow!" Kendall panted, arching his back and moaning as James pulled out and pushed back in again. This time he struck something that made Kendall shake and cry out, "J-James, hit there again—ohh," he let out a low groan as James slammed into that spot a second time. And a third.

This kept going for a while, James ramming in and out of Kendall's ass at a furious pace, hitting his sweet spot every time. Panting at the amazing feeling of Kendall tightening around his cock, James reached down and started to pump him in time with his thrusts. Then with a squeal and a shudder, Kendall came all over him, painting both their chests white. All it took was seeing Kendall's eyes drift shut in bliss and feeling him tighten just a little more that brought James over the edge too. He came with a grunt, filling Kendall to the brim.

He sat there for a second, breathing slowly and carefully. Then he pulled out and lay beside Kendall, who turned and smiled at him. "That was awesome."

"Really?" James wound an arm around Kendall's waist, pulling him into his arms. "But I hurt you."

Kendall shrugged feebly, snuggling into James's chest. "Yeah, but that doesn't matter."

James grinned at the ceiling. "Good." He paused. He wanted to say it; those three special words. But instead he went for, "Don't ever leave me for Jett."

"Wouldn't dream if it."

**Ok! Chapter done! Please review!**


	2. Pt1 Chapter 2

**Sorry to people who were waiting for this! It took me a while to do . . . anyway, I just wanna say I've really changed the plot from what I was originally gonna do. This isn't exactly gonna be a predictable Mpreg story, there's gonna be a copule of twists and I'm not sure if everyone reading will like it. However, I hope you stick with it nevertheless, and enjoy this chapter! **

"Are we gonna tell the others about us?" Kendall asked as they left the bathroom some time later, now completely cleaned up.

"Yeah, I guess," James replied. "I mean, they'll find out eventually either way. I think it'd be better if we told them."

"Yeah." Kendall sighed as he took a pair of boxers out of one of the drawers and pulled them on. "I just hope they don't react badly."

"Yeah, that would suck," James said, starting to get dressed too. "I don't think they will, though. It seems unlike them, y'know?"

Kendall nodded, pulling his t-shirt back on. Suddenly there was a call from the other room. "James? Kendall? You here?"

James shut his eyes in a grimace. "Ok. Let's do this." He took Kendall's hand and they went out into the kitchen.

Logan and Carlos smiled in greeting. "Hey, guys, we were gonna order pizza, so we wanted to see if . . ." Carlos stopped talking when he saw them holding hands. "If . . . ok, what's up with that?"

James gave Kendall's hand a comforting squeeze. "Well . . . Kendall and I are together now."

"Oh?" Logan raised his eyebrows. "Since when?"

"Um . . ." James glanced at his watch. "About an hour ago."

Logan smiled. "Typical." He stood up and grabbed the cordless phone from the kitchen counter. "Well, I'm cool with it; just don't start making out in front of me."

Kendall grinned, delighted at being accepted. "It's a deal."

The next morning, Kendall was talking to Tyler in the lobby when James walked up to him. He'd been planning what to say for a while now, so he was finally ready. "Hey Tyler, I just saw your mom and she said she wants to put you in a dog foor commercial."

"What?" Tyler ran away without another word.

Kendall turned to look at James. "Any specific reason you just did that?"

"You wanna see a movie tonight?" James asked him, flashing that irresistible smile.

"Yeah, ok. That's fine." Kendall paused. "Better than fine."

James grinned. "How about we head out at, maybe 8:00?"

"Sure. So, I'll see you at 7:30?"

"I'll see you there."

Kendall smiled, and even as he continued on his way to the pool, he couldn't fight the grin on his face.

"What movie should I get?" James asked once he was back in 2J, looking over at Carlos and Logan. The two were sitting on the couch and playing a video game, and James had to repeat his question in a yell to be heard.

Logan and Carlos reluctantly got up and looked at the movies listed on the computer screen. Get this one," Carlos said, pointing at a movie called 'Victim'.

"Why?" James looked at it. "I've never heard of that. Hell, I've never heard of any of these movies!"

"Yeah, but 'Victim' is a horror movie."

"So?"

"Well, to be more specific, it's the kind of horror movie that you like; the kind with torture and lots of blood."

"And . . .?"

Carlos smacked James on the back of the head. "Dude! You know Kendall likes all that Paranormal Activity stuff, but he hates bloody stuff! It's like, the one thing that creeps him out!"

"But why is that good? Why would I take him to a movie he'd be scared at?" James paused, smiling slowly. "Ohh. I get it."

* * *

><p>James met Kendall in the apartment at 7:30 and they headed downstairs to the lobby. However, when they got there, Mr. Bitters stepped in front of them. "Sorry, boys. No leaving The Palmowoods tonight."<p>

"And why is that?" James demanded, getting irritated.

"One word for you. Fangirls."

Kendall and James made terrfied faces.

"Exactly. Today is one of their bad days, so they're all outside the hotel, waiting for anyone of their teen idols to walk out the door. Just go back upstairs and stop bothering me, then you can do your stupid teenage things tomorrow."

Kendall and James both mumbled a lot of bad swaer words on the way back to the apartment. "I'm sorry about this, Kendall," James said with a sigh.

Kendall shrugged. "Don't worry. It's not really a big deal." As they went back into the apartment, he added, "We can just watch a DVD or something instead."

James nodded. "Actualyy, I don't really mind missing Victim. It looked a little heavy."

"Vctim? That's the gory one, right?"

James bit his lip, but nodded. "Uh huh . . . maybe I should've picked something else?"

"It doesn't really matter now." Kendall rolled his eyes. "But seriously Jamie, if you were trying to scare me so I'd just fall into your arms, you should've said so." He looked around before putting on a mock scared face and yelling, "Oh no, a swirly slide! Protect me!"

James started laughing and wound his arms around Kendall's waist, pulling him close to his chest. "Don't worry, baby. I'll protect you."

"Enough!" Carlos yelled as he passed. "I thought we had a deal!"

"Do you see any kissing here?" James asked, smirking. He ran his hands up and down Kendall's sides, making him shiver faintly and start giggling.

"Will you stop feeling him?" Katie demanded as she walked past. "It's creeping me out."

"Yeah, well." Kendall rested his head in the crook of James's neck. "It's a little late to say that, isn't it Jamie?" he said, softly enough for Katie not to hear. But not softly enough.

_"Ugh!"_ Carlos looked horrified. "I'm scarred for life! Ohmygod I'm not longer innocent . . . oh my poor virgin ears . . ."

"Can someone even have virgin ears?" Logan asked, coming into the kitchen.

"Apparently," Katie replied, walking towards the door with a towel in hand. "I'm off to the pool; I don't know how much more of this I can take."

"I'm with you on that," Logan and Carlos both said at once, following her out.

Kendall started to laugh. "Well, we scared everyone into going to the pool at night."

James grinned. "Is that bad? We're alone now."

He led Kendall over to the couch and pushed him down onto his back, before lying down and straddling his waist. With Kendall now pinned underneath him, James placed a slow, tender kiss on his soft lips. Kendall let out a happy sigh, wrapping his arms around James's neck and his legs around James's waist. This time it was Kendall who requested entrance into James's mouth, and he immediately got it. As their tongues tangled, James's arms wound around the small of Kendall's back and moved to his ass, giving it a squeeze and making Kendall groan. It was safe to say their movie was long forgotten.

The door to the apartment opened, but they were too wrapped up in each other to notice. They didn't react until they head, "Ahem."

James turned to see who it was and Kendall looked up. Both their jaws dropped open. They were actually in too much shock to move. Mrs Knight kept staring at them. "Care to explain this?"

Suddenly Kendall could move, and he immediately detached himself from James. "This . . . er . . . not what it looks like . . ."

"Really?" Mrs Knight stood in front of them, arms folded. "Because it looks like you and James are a little more than friends, and you were getting a little intimate on our couch."

Kendall sighed, sitting with his arms folded. "Fine. It is what it looks like."

Mrs Knight nodded. "I thought so."

"Are you mad?" Kendall sounded so worried.

"No, of course not. I already knew you were gay, sweetheart. It's not a big deal. However, you do realise what I have to do now."

"No, we don't," James said, looking confused.

"I've got no choice but to give you . . . The Talk."

She received two identical groans in reply and rolled her eyes. "This is no picnic for me either, boys. Now just listen to what I say and we can all pretend this didn't happen . . ."

* * *

><p>Two weeks later, James and Kendall's relationship was going great. They'd been on plenty of dates, sometimes to a movie, or to dinner. They'd gone to the beach once. But work with Gustavo often got in the way. Their record producer didn't even know they were together, and they planned to keep it that way. For now, at least.<p>

But on the Monday of the third week, things started to get complicated. Though they didn't realise that it was at first. Kendall had woken up that morning in James's arms, like every morning. However, this time Kendall didn't wait for James to wake up. He felt a terrible cramp in his stomach. He ignored it, but then it came back, only stronger. Kendall had eventually leaped out of bed and hurried to the bathroom, puking up whatever the hell he had eaten the night before. He coughed and choked, feeling his head pound very painfully. He finally managed to get back on his feet, brushing his teeth and heading into the kitchen. He didn't trust himself with eating, so he got a glass of water and sat down at the table, trying to calm down his unsteady breathing. The icy drink managed to cool down his feverish face and help his headache a little.

James walked into the kitchen, sitting down next to Kendall and placing a soft kiss on his lips. "Morning, Kenny."

Kendall smiled against James's lips, kissing him back. "Morning, Jamie. I just came out here to get a drink. I would've waited for you . . ."

James laughed and got to his feet and heading over to the fridge. "No biggie. I sure hope Gustavo doesn't push us too hard today. I'm really not in the mood."

Kendall smiled. "Are you ever?"

The day was pretty uneventful. A day full of dancing and harmonies. Although Kendall felt queasy at one point during one or Mr. X's crazy dance routines, there was no other sign that that morning hadn't just been a one-time thing.

But then in the late afternoon, Gustavo called them all into his office. "Dogs! Here I was, thinking you were getting better at dancing, and singing! But_ no_! You're all _average_, or _worse than average_!" Kendall suddenly felt nauseous, and it wasn't to do with Gustavo's insults; he was used to them.

"Maybe you're busy with your stupid teenage lives, but that's no excuse for _average-ness_!"

Kendall clutched his stomach as he felt another wave of nausea. "Gustavo, can I be excused?"

"No, I'm not done yelling at you yet!"

"But—"

"Zip it, dog!"

Kendall sighed, then clutched his stomach again. He clapped a hand to his mouth. Oh God, he really didn't feel well . . .

"Kendall, are you alright?" Kelly asked, concern evident on her face.

Kendall shook his head, retching as he doubled over. By now James, Carlos and Logan were all crowded around him. James draped a hand around Kendall's waist, holding him up. "Kendall?"

Only Carlos seemed to realise, and he quickly handed Kendall the trash can from beside Gustavo's desk. Kendall grabbed it and promptly threw up whatever was left in his stomach. He knelt there, dry heaving for what felt like hours. He could feel a hand rubbing his back in an attempt to soothe him. He didn't know who it was, and at that moment he didn't care.

Finally, he dared look up. Gustavo looked shocked. Kelly looked sympathetic. "Maybe you should go home," she said gently.

Kendall nodded, biting his lip. He stood up, swaying on his feet. James grabbed his arm to steady him, leading him out of the office. Logan dashed into the room with all the coffee and shit and came out with a bottle of water. "Here," he handed it to Kendall, who gave a small smile in thanks.

Kendall took a sip, feeling a teeny tiny bit better. "I hope Gustavo isn't pissed at me."

"Who cares what he thinks?" Carlos said with a wave of his hand. "Besides, he can by a new trash can."

"Hold on." Logan looks amazed. "You care if Gustavo is mad at you? You must be really sick!"

Kendall barely smiled.

The limo ride back to the apartment was quiet. Kendall rested his head against James's shoulder and let his eyes drift shut, suddenly exhausted. James ran his fingers through his soft blonde hair, only rolling his eyes when Carlos made kissing faces at him.

They arrived back at the Palmwoods, and James slowly nudged Kendall awake. "Kendall, baby. We're back." Kendall's fluttered open. He gave a muffled yawn and sat up.

Logan and Carlos leaped out of the limo, running off to the pool. James got out too, holding out a hand for Kendall to take. Kendall, after stating that he wasn't a girl, took James's hand and got out of the car. As he stood up, a wave of dizziness washed over him and his knees gave way. James held him up. "Are you ok?"

Kendall nodded, straightening up. "I just felt a little faint. I'm fine now."

James nodded, though he didn't look convinced. "C'mon let's go upstairs and watch a movie or something."

"Ok." They walked across the lobby and over to the elevator, hand in hand. James pushed the button, and after a few seconds the doors opened.

Jett was in the elevator. He smiled in greeting at Kendall. "Hey, Kendall. What's up?" His eyes strayed downward for a second, and he spotted their intertwined fingers. He looked back up, his smile faltering.

"Oh, just to let you know," James said with a grin. "We're dating now."

With a very forced smile, Jett replied, "That's cool. Catch you later, Kendall." He walked away.

James stepped into the elevator, grinning from ear to ear. Kendall rolled his eyes at him. "Unnecessary."

"Yeah, but it was fun," James replied.

The doors opened again and they both stepped out. "Hey, Jamie, I hope you realise that Jett's still my friend and I'm gonna hang out with him, even if you hate it."

James sighed. "I figured as much. You'd probably punch me if I suggested otherwise."

"Yes, I would've," Kendall replied with a wink. They went inside the apartment. Katie was sitting on the couch, watching—

"_Twilight?_" James said, wrinkling his nose in disgust. "Seriously?"

"It's Eclipse, now shush!" Katie snapped.

"Besides, you know we're only watching for Taylor," Camille added. James hadn't even noticed, but she and Stephanie were there too.

Kendall turned to James. "I'll be right back." He went into the bathroom, and James sat down on the couch, arms folded.

"What's so good about Wolf Boy anyway?" James demanded in an undertone.

"His abs," Katie, Stephanie and Camille said at the same time, staring intently at the TV.

Kendall came back and walked over to where James was sitting. Before he could sit down himself, James grabbed him by the hips and pulled him onto his lap. Kendall rested on James's shoulder again, legs sprawled on the couch. "If it makes you feel any better," Kendall murmured in James's ear. "Your abs are way hotter than Wolf Boy's."

James smiled, turning and pressing a kiss to Kendall's temple. "Thanks. That did make me feel better."

"Shush!" three female voices chorused.

* * *

><p>Tuesday wasn't much better. He threw up twice in the morning, once in the middle of the night. His head hurt throughout the whole day, and when he got up to go to the bathroom, everything started spinning for a minute or two. It was awful. But he just pushed it aside, firmly telling himself that it would go away.<p>

On Wednesday, he actually did faint. The day started the way it had Monday and Tuesday; a headache and some more vomiting. He got dresses and had breakfast, which was just half an apple. He didn't want to eat much.

"Kendall, are you on a diet or something?" James asked, as he, Carlos and Logan dug into tall heaps of pancakes. "Because if you are, you need to stop. Now." He smiled sweetly. "You look perfect the way you are."

Carlos "Aww"ed and made kissy faces for what felt like the millionth time that week. Kendall ignored him and smiled back at James. "Thanks, Jamie. And no, I'm not dieting. I'm just not hungry. I'll eat later."

Carlos hopped out of his chair and ran towards the door. "I'm going to the pool now!"

The door slammed loudly, and Kendall felt a searing pain in his head, followed by that lightheaded feeling. When he looked up, James and Logan's faces seemed to blur and spin, and their voices seemed muffled and distant for a moment.

He then realised what they were saying. "Wanna go down with him, James? Kendall?"

Kendall barely managed a nod. His head was still spinning. He saw Logan walk over towards the door, and James too. Determined not to show how he was feeling, he quickly got to his feet.

This was a mistake. Everything just spun faster, and the next thing he knew, the ground came flying up to meet him and everything went dark.

When he heard the thump, James looked around to see Kendall land on the floor in a heap. He felt horror course through him when his boyfriend didn't get back up. "Kendall!"

James fell to his knees next to him, shaking him gently by the shoulder. "Kendall, baby?"

He didn't stir, so James picked him up and carried him into their shared room. "Is he alright?" Logan asked anxiously, following him in and watching as James set his boyfriend down on his bed.

"I dunno," James replied, feeling totally useless. "He just collapsed, out of nowhere!"

Logan placed a hand on Kendall's forehead. "He's got a bit of a fever," he said worriedly. "You know, he probably has the flu. It would explain why he's been throwing up all week."

James sighed. "Poor Kendall. He hates being sick." He smiled suddenly. "Hey, remember that time in 7th Grade when I had that really bad cold and you three came to visit me? You all ended up getting sick and our moms had us all sitting on my couch wrapped up in blankets."

Logan chuckled. "Yeah, that was pretty funny." He started walking towards the door. "Maybe we should just let him rest for a while. Come to the pool with me. He'll be awake when you come back, I guarantee it."

James couldn't help smiling. "Ok."

Kendall did wake up a while later, with a fever and a sore head. Oh, joy.

Thursday followed the now regular routine. Sickness in the morning, dizziness in the afternoon, headaches at night, and exhaustion pretty much all day long. He was really getting sick—bad word to use—of this. Dancing now caused him serious discomfort. He was starting to think that maybe he should try to find out what was wrong with him, but he just firmly told himself that it would go away.

Friday was the same. Then on Saturday, his best friend put his foot down.

It started with the usual morning sickness. James and Carlos had to go in to Rocque Records and record some solos, while Kendall and Logan had to go in the next day. He didn't really feel like doing anything at that moment. Logan was sitting on the bright orange couch and watching TV. Kendall walked over and sat next to him. "Hey," he said dully, leaning back.

"Hey," Logan replied. "How are you feeling?"

"Ok," Kendall said, a little confused. "It was just a fainting spell. No big deal."

Logan just gave him an 'I'm not stupid' look and got to his feet. "Then, how about we go and do something fun?"

Kendall got up too. And staggered, Logan holding him up. "I caught you out, didn't I?"

Kendall just tried to straighten up. Logan continued. "Kendall, I think you should see a doctor. This has been going on for a week now!"

"I'm fine, Logan," Kendall snapped angrily, not in the mood to talk, or to ask how Logan knew it had been going on. He pulled out of Logan's grip and suddenly felt that now horribly familiar feeling in this stomach. "Shit . . ." He only just made it to the bathroom that time, practically holding onto the toilet seat for dear life. He took a few deep shuddering breaths, before sitting up and resting his back against the wall. He looked up and saw Logan standing at the door. "Well, there goes breakfast," He said half-jokingly.

The smart boy didn't smile; in fact, his frown got bigger. "I'm gonna get you a glass of water." He left, and after a few seconds, Kendall got to his feet, using the wall for support as he felt another familiar wave of light-headedness. And now he had a headache too. Great.

He walked into the kitchen, and Logan handed him a glass of water. "Thanks, Logie."

"No problem."

Kendall gulped the water down. "So, what are you doing now? Going to the pool? Reading?"

Logan smirked. "Funny you should ask." He took the empty glass and dumped it on the counter.

"Huh?"

"What I'm doing is taking you to the doctor," Logan said cheerfully, before grabbing hold of Kendall's arm and dragging him down the hallway. "I don't need to see a doctor! I hate doctors!" Kendall whined, struggling. Logan glared at him.

"Oh, no offence to you, Logie." He was shoved into the elevator and before he could jump back out, the doors shut.

"Kendall, it could be something serious," Logan said. "You've been throwing up everything you eat, you nearly fainted twice, you actually did faint once, you have a fever, and you're moody! And don't deny it, because I know _everything!_ And now I'm taking you to the freaking doctor!"

Kendall groaned. "Fine."

The car ride to the hospital was silent; Kendall was sitting with his arms folded, pouting. Logan's hands were gripping the steering wheel as he stared determinedly ahead of him. They could've gone to Doctor Hollywood, but he was . . . well, he was useless. Plus, they didn't think chainsaws would solve any of their problems.

Sitting in the waiting room was nerve-wracking for Kendall. He hated hospitals; they just made him think of sickness and death. It was horrible. He didn't understand how Logan had always wanted to spend all his working time in one of these hellholes. Thankfully, there weren't many appointments for just a simple check-up, so after Logan had a quick word with the receptionist, it didn't take long before they were called in to the office behind the large double doors.

Kendall and Logan walked in, and Kendall reluctantly sat on the examining table. "I don't wanna be here right now."

Logan just shrugged. Then the doctor, who looked about thirty, walked in. She pushed a lock of dark hair behind her ear and smiled. "Hello there, I'm Ellen. I take it you're today's lucky patient?"

Kendall grunted.

"And you are . . .?"

"Kendall Knight," he mumbled. She wrote it down on her clipboard. "Alright, what seems to be the problem, Kendall?"

Kendall was about to speak when Logan interrupted him. "He's been throwing up all week, he fainted once or twice, he's moody and he's got a fever."

"Ah. Ok then. This won't take too long."

She took blood tests, checked his eyes and ears, looked at his temperature, heartbeat and weight, and did about a million other things that Kendall didn't understand. "Right. I'll just go and check out the results of the tests. I'll be right back." She left the room, and Kendall and Logan were left alone.

"Kendall?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I tell you something?"

"Sure, go ahead."

"Just promise not to judge me."

Kendall almost rolled his eyes. "I won't."

"I think I'm in love with Carlos."

There was silence for a few seconds. Then Kendall slowly said, "Well, that was really random."

Logan gave a small smile. "I know. But . . . I really needed to get it off my chest."

Kendall smiled back. "I think it's great." He paused. "Though I'm not sure how Gustavo will react when he finds out all his band members are paired off with each other."

"Huh?" Logan looked confused. "I said I like him, I never said we were together."

This time Kendall did roll his eyes. "Logan you're so clueless. Carlos likes you too. You should see the way he stares at you. It's actually kind of creepy."

Logan smiled the widest Kendall had ever seen. "Really?"

"Yep."

Ellen walked back in, pulling some kind of weird machine with a screen on the top behind her. "Hey, Kendall, I'm just going to give you an ultrasound real quick, ok?"

"Why?" Logan-the-future-doctor asked.

"I just want to check something out," she replied quickly. "Ok, Kendall, lie down and lift your shirt up."

Kendall did, and she spread some weird cold blue gel over his abdomen. Kendall shivered, staring at the ceiling. He glanced at the doctor and saw her get some remote thing and move it slowly across his stomach, staring intently at the screen at the same time. She frowned thoughtfully. "Now, that's very interesting . . ."

"What is?" Logan asked impatiently.

"Um . . . well . . ." She took a deep breath. "You're not gonna believe this . . ."

Kendall waited. Logan waited.

"You're pregnant, honey."

**Well, I bet nobody expected THAT! Hehe . . . please review!**


	3. Pt1 Chapter 3

**This is really just a filler chapter. I've been up to my neck in stupid SCHOOL and exams for weeks. Bleh DX anywayz, enjoy the chapter!**

"You're pregnant, honey."

There was a deafening silence. Then, "W-what?"

"You're pregnant," Ellen repeated. "I couldn't believe it myself."

"B-but . . . that's not possible," Kendall protested weakly. "It's just . . . I _can't _. . ."

"Well, it seems you just have a condition that allows you to conceive. It's very rare, but it's possible. It's happened before."

Kendall didn't say anything. He just stared blankly at the floor. Logan looked at Ellen. She cleared her throat. "Well, I'm going to go put these results in file. I'll leave you two decide what you're going to do."

Logan was so shocked that he didn't bother telling her he wasn't the baby's father. He turned to Kendall, and saw a few tears streaking down his cheeks. "Oh, Kendall. Please don't . . ."

"How could this happen to me?" Kendall whispered, sniffling miserably. "I'm a sixteen-year-old boy, and I'm pregnant. _I'm fucking pregnant!_"

"Kendall, it's ok." Logan pulled Kendall into a hug as he continued sobbing hysterically.

"No, it's not! What am I gonna do? There's the band, and the media . . . Ohmygod what am I gonna tell James?" Kendall started crying harder. Logan held him tighter. He couldn't remember the last time they'd been this close.

"Kendall, it'll be fine. We're gonna tell Gustavo and if he says one word to you he's gonna wake up breathing through a tube." Logan also couldn't remember the last time he'd talked like this. "And you're going to ignore the press no matter how much they annoy you, got it? And Griffin's gonna be fine with it, and Mr X, and James is gonna accept you or he's gonna hear all about it from me." He paused. "But, I understand if you want to . . . you know . . ."

Kendall shook his head. "I couldn't do that. I'll . . . I'll keep it." He gave a watery smile. "I guess I'm just in shock right now."

Logan smiled back. "It'll be alright."

Ellen walked back into the room. "Well, what have you decided, Kendall?"

"I'm gonna keep the baby," Kendall replied, drying his tear-stained cheeks with his sleeve.

Ellen smiled. "Well, congratulations. I'm going to be your nurse for the next nine months. I'll keep this quiet if you like, and you can call me whenever you want to make an appointment." She took a work card from her desk and handed it to him. "Good luck."

Once they were back in the car, Logan turned to Kendall and asked, "Who's first?"

"Gustavo," Kendall replied. "Before I tell the others, I just need to think a little."

"Fine by me." Logan started the car and they drove off to Rocque Records. When they walked in the door, they were quiet, wanting to make sure they didn't run into James or Carlos. "Go wait in the office," Logan said to Kendall. "I'll get Gustavo."

Kendall went inside Gustavo's ridiculously extravagant office. He could barely breathe_. Ok, I'm just gonna have to say it straight out . . . oh God, what if he yells at me? I really don't need that right now. Then again, it's not my fault I'm gonna have a baby, it's not like I knew it could happen. I mean, seriously, how was I supposed to know?_ His thoughts were interrupted by Gustavo and Kelly walking into the room with Logan.

"The smart dog said you have something to tell us," Gustavo said, sitting in the chair behind his desk with Kelly standing next to him.

"Yeah," Kendall replied slowly. "I'm . . . uh . . . remember when I was sick a few days ago?"

"What about it?"

"There was a reason I was . . . you know, sick."

"What, so it wasn't just food poisoning?"

"Nope." Kendall shut his eyes in a grimace, then opened them again. "I'm . . . uh . . ."

"Spit it out, dog!"

"I'm pregnant!"

Gustavo and Kelly stared at him with wide eyes. Then Gustavo started to laugh. "Haha, very funny. If this is some crazy scheme to get out of dance rehearsals—"

"It's not," Logan cut in. "It's true. We went to the doctor today."

Gustavo looked astounded. "But . . . who's the father?" he looked extremely awkward when he said the last word.

Kendall was just happy he wasn't being yelled at for being gay. So he answered. "James."

"I knew it!" Kelly shrieked. Everyone stared at her. "Well, I always thought it was obvious he had a thing for you," she added, blushing. "I just wasn't sure if the feeling was mutual."

"Well, it is," Kendall said with a sigh. "And now I'm some kind of father-mother-thingy."

Logan looked like he was trying hard not to smile when he said, "If you don't mind, we'll go home now. See you tomorrow."

He left the office and Kendall hurried after him. "That wasn't so bad," he said with a grin once they were back in the car.

"Yeah, but we're not done yet. You've gotta tell Katie and your mom next."

Kendall sighed. "It won't be so bad this time. I have a plan."

"Ok, good."

When they got to the Palmwoods, they went straight upstairs to 2J. Kendall opened the door and walked into the apartment, to see Katie and his mom sitting at the table having lunch. "Guess what, mom? I'm gonna have a baby!"

Katie's chocolate milk sprayed all over the floor and there was the sound of a plate smashing as Mrs Knight leaped out of her chair.

"That was your _plan?_" Logan demanded in exasperation.

"Well, I just wanted to get it over with."

Mrs Knight was staring. "Honey, what are you talking about?"

"Well, I've been sick all week so Logan made me go to the doctor and it turns out, I'm pregnant!"

Mrs Knight looked disapproving. "I take it James is the father of this baby, and you ignored the talk I gave you?"

"Well, it kinda happened before you gave us the talk. We did what you said after that, it was just . . . er . . . a little late."

"This is awesome!" Katie squealed. "I'm gonna be an auntie!"

Kendall, Logan and Mrs Knight all gave her blank looks. She blushed slightly. "Well, I am. It'll be fun!"

Mrs Knight rolled her eyes. "Well, I'll give you boys some peace for a while." She grabbed her handbag. "I have some shopping to do, so I'll be off. And you're coming too, Katie."

"What? Why?"

"Because. Now come on."

The two left the apartment.

"Five down, two to go," Logan said. The smile vanished from Kendall's face. This was going to be the most difficult by miles.

Seeing Kendall's drastic change of expression, Logan smiled sympathetically, resting a comforting hand on his shoulder. "How about I tell Carlos, and then you tell James? I think that'd be easier."

"Thanks, Logan." Kendall tried to smile, but failed epically. This was a lot more nerve-wracking than telling Gustavo or his family was. What if James didn't believe him? Or worse, what if he did believe him and started yelling at him and calling him names and—

"Hey, babe."

Kendall almost screamed as a warm pair of lips touched his. He hadn't heard James or Carlos come in. Maybe Gustavo had sent them home early.

"Hi," he replied, forcing a smile.

"Hey, Carlitos! Let's go to the pool!" Logan said suddenly, grabbing the Latino's hand and leaving the room. He gave Kendall a meaningful look as he passed. Kendall knew what he was saying.

Once the door closed, James turned to Kendall. "What should we do? We could down with them." He slid his arms around Kendall's waist and pulled him close to whisper softly in his ear, "Or we can stay here."

"Actually, I want to talk to you."

"Ok. What about?" James led Kendall over to the couch and they sat down.

"Um . . . I . . ."

"Spit it out, babe."

"I . . ." Kendall took a deep breath. "I'm . . ." _Oh, grow a pair and just say it!_

"Kendall?"

"I'm pregnant."

Kendall didn't look at James for a moment; he was too worried. Somehow, he forced himself to look up. James was staring at him. His eyes were wide and his jaw was hanging open. Then he managed to stutter out, "R-really?"

Kendall nodded. When James didn't say anything, he felt tears building up. "J-James? Are you ok?"

James didn't say anything.

"James, please . . ." Tears started to fall. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean for this to happen . . . please don't hate me!" He hid his face in his hands and continued to cry.

"Kendall, I'm not mad at you." James wound an arm around his boyfriend and reeled him in, holding him close. "I'd never get angry at you for something like . . . like getting pregnant. It's not liked you planned it or anything."

"So you're not gonna leave me?"

"Oh, Kendall." Kendall could swear he actually saw tears in James's eyes. "I love you. I love you so much . . ."

Kendall snuggled closer to James. "I love you too." He smiled when James kissed him, but he couldn't help noticing that his boyfriend hadn't answered the question.

Things weren't going to be easy from now on.

**Please review.**


	4. Pt1 Chapter 4

**Hehe, I know I should probably be working on my other stories, but I'm so inspired with this fanfic and Lost & Found that I'm writing them more. i don't like this chapter much, I don't think I wrote it very well. Lol enjoy the chapter!**

Kendall walked through the Palmwoods lobby, heading towards the pool. It had been two weeks since the traumatising task of telling his friends of his pregnancy. Things were going ok, for now. But that seemed to change when Camille walked up to him with a tabloid magazine in hand. "Hey, Kendall. Did you see this?" She handed it over to him.

Kendall stared in horror at the magazine. On the very front page, there was a huge photograph of him and Logan in the hospital waiting room, talking to Ellen. Above was a large headline:

**BIG TIME PREGNANT?**

Heart pounding, Kendall read the short article underneath the photo.

_What's happening here?__ Kendall Knight and Logan Henderson of BTR talking with a doctor who, as we learned from another surgeon in the practice, also specialises as a maternity nurse? Could this mean one of Gustavo Rocque's 'dogs' is knocked up? Later issues may hold the answers._

Kendall handed the magazine back to Camille, still shaking. "Oh God, how could this happen to me . . .?"

"So it's true?" Camille said with a gasp. "Logan's pregnant? I bet it was Carlos, although that wouldn't make much sense seeing as you went to the doctor instead of him—"

"Camille, Logan took _me_ to the doctor. I'm the . . ." Kendall glanced around and lowered his voice. "_I'm_ the one who's pregnant."

"WHAT?" Kendall's hand quickly clamped over Camille's mouth. "Shh! Please don't do that! The last thing we need is—_ugh!"_

Kendall snatched his hand away, staring at it in disgust. "You just bit me!"

"Yes, I did." Camille winked. "Don't worry, though. Your secret's safe with me."

Kendall walked out to the pool, sitting on a sun lounger. He'd barely been there for five minutes when a shadow cast over his spot on his chair. He looked up. "Gustavo wants us down at the studio right now," Carlos said. "He sounded mad; I think we should hurry."

Kendall leaped to his feet and followed Carlos out to the waiting limo. He climbed in and sat down next to James, who immediately wrapped an arm around him. "Hey."

"Hi."

The ride to Rocque Records was strangely quiet. Everyone was worried about what bizarre rage their producer might be in. When they walked in the door of the studio and Kelly immediately appeared, calling them into Gustavo's office, their worry only increased. The four boys wandered into the office, and were granted with a worrying sight. Griffin was standing there with two of his weird CEO assistants. The three were standing with their arms folded, looking stern,

"Good to see you, boys," Griffin said. "Well, actually, it's not so good."

"Why not?" Carlos dared to ask.

Kendall looked to Gustavo for help, but he and Kelly looked just as confused as he felt.

Then Griffin dropped the bombshell. "Gustavo and Kelly informed me of . . . an issue that seems to have taken place. And, I feel that I need to make a drastic decision of what to do with this band. So, I'm sending you four home. Bit Time Rush is finished, for good this time."

"WHAT?" six voices echoed in horror.

"Griffin, this is the best band you've ever had!" Gustavo protested. "You can't fire them just because of a minor setback!"

"Minor?" Griffin pointed an accusing finger at Kendall. "He's going to have a baby! This is not a minor setback! Haven't you thought about the media? There are already rumours spreading. You know they'll find out the truth, and then what will happen?"

"Griffin, please-"

"I'm sorry, Kelly. I have no choice."

"Make them go public."

Every head turned towards one of Griffin's CEO assistants. She cleared her throat and continued. "Why not have them come out to the press? That way, it won't come as much of a shock to the fans. Besides, you know how popular gay guys are in bands these days."

"I think it's a great idea!" Logan said cheerfully. When Griffin glared at him he fell silent.

However, the CEO executive looked thoughtful. "Well, I suppose we could try it. After all, I was going to send you home anyway. If it doesn't work out, I'll do the same thing."

Everyone nodded gratefully. Maybe this would work out after all.

* * *

><p>KAMES!<p>

_Who saw this coming? James Maslow and Kendall Schmidt of BTR have released shocking news to the public! It seems the two have been dating for over a month now, and have informed the public of their loving relationship. "We're really happy together," James said when they announced their relationship. "There will be people who don't like it, but we don't mind. We can't make everyone happy." We wish the couple the very best for the future._

* * *

><p>The next few days were uneventful, and then one day when they were at the studio, Gustavo had cut their recording session short. "You two can go home now," Gustavo said to Logan and Carlos.<p>

"We're sending you in for an interview with Pop Tiger magazine," Kelly said to Kendall and James, once the other two had disappeared. "The journalist will be here in twenty minutes. Good luck."

* * *

><p><em><strong>We're here with two members of the singing sensation BTR, James Diamond and Kendall Knight. The two have recently come out and announce to the fans that they're dating:<strong>_

_**So, when did this actually happen?  
><strong>__**James:**__ A few weeks ago. It's a funny story actually; there was basically me acting really jealous and Kendall figuring out how I felt. Things kind of took off from there._

_**That's so sweet! And, right now there are rumours going around since the paps took a photo of you outside the hospital with Logan [Henderson], Kendall. It was even published in a few tabloids. Any chance you could fill us in on this?  
><strong>__**Kendall:**__ Uh, well . . . (clears throat) I'm not sure if I should say. It might be a bit of a shock._

_**I think we can handle it.  
><strong>__**James:**__I never knew this, but there's a very rare condition guys can get, it lets them have kids. It's really, really rare. I'd never even heard of it before.  
><em>_**Kendall:**__ But I'm one of those few._

_**You're pregnant! Seriously? That's amazing, congrats you guys!  
><strong>__**James and Kendall:**__ Thank you._

_**So, this came as a big shock?  
><strong>__**Kendall:**__ Yeah, definitely. I kept telling myself there had to be some mistake, but then I kinda had to accept it. I'm happy now; I wouldn't change it if I could._

_**And James? How do you feel?  
><strong>__**James:**__ (pauses and smiles) I'm happy too. This is a great thing for us._

_**Well, we're running out of time, so maybe one more question before we say goodbye. What are you hoping for? A girl or a boy?  
><strong>__**Kendall: **__I don't mind either way. I'll be happy whatever I get. And I'm happy waiting until the baby's born to find out.  
><em>_**James:**__ Me too._

Camille closed the magazine and walked through the lobby to wear Kendall was appearing out of the elevator. "Hey, I read the Pop Tiger interview!"

"Really?" Kendall smiled. "I feel a lot better knowing I don't have to hide it anymore."

"Not surprised. I mean, after a while keeping it a secret would've been pretty difficult." Camille made gestures at his stomach.

Kendall laughed. "Yeah, you're right. Anyway, thanks for keeping the secret. You wanna go get smoothies? My treat."

"That's the best idea you've had yet, blondie," Camille grinned, taking him by the arm and dragging him away.

* * *

><p>When Kendall woke up in the morning, he was so comfortable he didn't want to move. Though his head hurt a little, his stomach wasn't bothering him for once. He moved his hand across the bed as he slowly opened his eyes. But, where he expected to feel the warm hard body of his boyfriend, there was just cool empty air.<p>

He sat up, looking around in confusion. Where was James? He got out of bed and, walking towards the door, spotted something on the desk. A crumpled piece of paper that he was pretty sure hadn't been there yesterday. He picked it up. It was a quick note, scribbled down in blue pen. The ink was smudged in places and the writing was shaky. It was James's writing.

Heart suddenly pounding, Kendall began to read. With each word, his heart sank lower. His hands started to shake. Then all of him started to shake. He didn't even realise this until he heard the door open and a voice saying, "Hey, Kendall. Didn't you hear me—hey, what's wrong?"

Kendall handed the note over with trembling fingers. The words seemed to have etched themselves into his brain. He heard Carlos gasp, and then, "Oh, Kendall."

At this, Kendall burst into tears. He staggered backwards until he felt the bed against the back of his knees and sat down. He knew his legs wouldn't support him anymore. He heard the creak as Carlos sat next to him, felt the arm around his shoulders. He didn't respond to it; he just kept crying. But when Carlos pulled him closer and wrapped another arm around him, he didn't resist.

Logan walked into the room a few minutes later to see Carlos and Kendall hugging each other tightly. Before he could start getting jealous of this, he noticed Kendall crying. "Guys, what's wrong?"

Carlos didn't say anything; he just handed him a crumpled piece of paper. Logan started to read, not really sure what the big deal was. Then his mouth dropped open, and he felt anger, shock and betrayal run through him at the same time. The note was short and simple.

_I can't do this. I'm sorry._

_I love you._

Not even a goodbye.

**Right! There's one of those twists I mentioned. Like I said before, not everyone would like them, and there are gonna be more twists and stuff. Please review, even if you loved what just happened, or want to strangle me for it. I don't mind, I just want your opinions!**


	5. Pt1 Chapter 5

**I don't like this chapter much, but it's better than nothing. At least it moves the plot and explains things a little.**

Nobody wanted to believe it was true. They searched the apartment for James, Logan and Katie went to search the Palmwoods and ask everyone if they'd seen him. But reality of the situation was hanging above their heads, and they knew they were wasting their time.

All James's stuff was gone, even his posters. He'd really left them. Nobody could believe it. "He's not answering his phone," Carlos said furiously after calling for the third time. It was about noon at this point, and Kendall was still sitting in the same spot on his bed. Had he really been crying for two hours straight? It seemed impossible to believe, but there he was, a few tears still silently falling.

* * *

><p>A month. One painful, unbearable month of crappy recordings, mismatched choreography, and bad moods. Kendall's mood swings along with his broken heart caused him to burst into tears in the middle of songs and other random moments, or to get angry and start screaming and throwing things at people. Carlos's tireless energy made him restless and bored, and Logan was just quiet, doing what needed to be done. Rehearsals just weren't the same anymore.<p>

It was almost a relief that griffin came to see them again one afternoon with a grim expression, though they all felt a strange sense of déjà vu.

"Hello, boys," he greeted, standing by the desk n Gustavo's office as they all trooped in, knowing what was coming.

"Hey," they all replied dully.

To everyone's surprise, Griffin looked at Kendall and smiled sympathetically. "I'm sorry about James."

Kendall didn't say anything, but smiled back.

"Anyway, boys," Griffin continued. "You know what I have to do now."

Everyone nodded glumly.

"I just gave you a second chance," Griffin said almost sadly. "Now you've messed up again."

"This isn't our fault—" Carlos began, but shut up when Logan elbowed him in the ribs.

"Then whose fault is it?" when no one said anything, Griffin went on. "I admit, I don't want to do this. But this time, I really have no choice. The band is nothing with three members. You know you won't be able to find a good replacement. The amount of fans you have is going to decrease hugely and quickly. Even if I let you stay, the band would be dead after a month or two. It's better this way. Trust me."

Everyone began packing for Minnesota with heavy hearts. They'd barely saved themselves from going home last time; this time there was no other option. In the middle of the afternoon, Katie seemed to get tired and left the apartment, saying she was gonna go hang out with Tyler.

Kendall put the last of his things into his suitcase and zipped it shut. He looked around the now empty room. It looked so blank and . . . meaningless. He didn't want to go back to Minnesota. He'd grown to love LA, and the Palmwoods, and everyone he knew. He would miss them all so much. Though not as much as he missed James.

Kendall realised he was crying when the tears dripped onto his t-shirt. He let out a shaky breath, not bothering to dry his eyes. What was the point?

Logan appeared in the room, looking concerned. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing serious," Kendall murmured, brushing the tears away at last. "I just don't want to leave, that's all."

Logan didn't look convinced, but only said, "We're having lunch now."

"Ok." Kendall didn't feel like eating—he hadn't since that horrible day a month ago—but he had to, for the baby. He followed Logan into the kitchen and sat at the table, still feeling down.

Katie came back into the apartment, having been out for a couple of hours. "Hi." She sat at the table, not saying anything. Everyone was quiet as they ate, even Carlos.

When they finished, everyone helped wash up except Kendall, who was told to sit on the couch and not strain himself. He didn't want to sit still, he wanted to do everything people who weren't pregnant did. He felt like crying again. Probably just the mood swings.

A while later, as they were all piling their stuff by the apartment door, Katie cell phone rang. She scrambled to get it out of her pocket and answered it. "Hello?" A pause. "Really?" Another pause. "Ok, thanks so much. Yes, I'll be there." She hung up.

"What was that about?" Mrs Knight asked.

Katie grinned. "Oh, nothing. It's just that I now have a job with New Town High, which means we get to stay!"

"_What?_" everyone screamed. Mrs Knight sounded more angry than delighted like the three boys were.

Katie suddenly looked sheepish. "Well, when I was out I was at an audition. The lead, Jo, moved to New Zealand to shoot some three movie deal, so they're putting Megan as the main character and want to bring in another girl. Someone younger, someone my age. You had to have an adult with you so I took Buddha Bob with me, and they just called and told me I've got the part. So, we get to stay!"

"You could've told us where you were going," Mrs Knight said.

"I know, but I didn't want to get anyone's hopes up. I saw all the other girls that were there and I thought I didn't have much of a chance."

Everyone felt happier almost instantly, even though the hole James had left was still there. Still, there was a lot of unpacking to do now.

* * *

><p>Kendall sat on the sun lounger, feeling another flash of annoyance when his stomach seemed to get in the way yet again. He was getting a lot bigger now, and it drove him crazy. Maybe he was lucky James wasn't around to see him like this. He was only pregnant three months; why would he look like in a month or two? Even just thinking about his ex still made tears appear in the corner of his eyes. He brushed them away angrily. Why was he so pathetic? James wasn't coming back and he was gonna have to accept that. He needed to move on.<p>

"Hi." Kendall looked up too see Jett standing in front, smiling almost cautiously.

"Hey," Kendall replied quietly as Jett sat next to him.

"How are you doing?" Jett asked finally, turning to look at him.

"Ok. A little better than I was, I guess." Kendall groaned, raking a hand through his hair. "I don't really know."

"I know what you mean," Jett said, smiling sadly and winding an arm around Kendall's shoulder. "And I get the way you're feeling."

"You do?"

"No. But I can imagine it."

Kendall smiled weakly and rested against the actor, sighing. "I just . . . I miss him."

"I know you do." Jett hugged Kendall tighter. "If it's any consolation, I think you'll make an amazing father."

Kendall smiled. "Thank you."

Kendall rested his head on Jett's shoulder, half shutting his eyes. The comfort was nice, and he really needed it at this point. He needed to move on, like _now_.

When Jett tilted his chin up and kissed him, he decided not to argue.

* * *

><p>James's new apartment wasn't as big or as comfortable as 2J, but it'd do. He'd found a job in a sports store the day before. The manager didn't like him; he knew that. He'd said, "Hold on, weren't you in Big Time Rush?" He'd said, "Yes, I was." Then she'd said, "You were dating Kendall, the pregnant one. And you're the one who left, right?" He'd had to nod and say he was, and her eyes had instantly turned cold. But she'd still given him the job. The same thing happened with any customer who recognised him, and he couldn't say he blamed them.<p>

He was currently sitting on his new couch, flicking mindlessly through a new Pop Tiger, looking for any news on his old friends. The guys, or Jo, even those annoying CSIs, anyone would do. He turned to page 43 and froze.

_KETT: Hollywood's new hottest couple?_

_Maybe not yet, but one thing's for sure; these two cuties make a great pair. "We're taking things slow for now," Jett says. "It's not that long since [James] left, we don't wanna rush things."_

_Of course, who could forget James Diamond's hasty departure from BTR? Or that Kendall is now three months pregnant with the singer's baby? We can see why Kett want to take it slow, and we hope they'll longer than Kames did._

James stared at the photo above the article. Kendall and Jett arm in arm at some red carpet event. He could see that Kendall's stomach was slightly rounded, even with the shirt and jacket he was wearing. He was at least thre months along by now. That was his baby. _His_. Not Jett's. James felt his heart breaking and he flung the magazine across the room angrily.

He hated being wrong, but he knew it was his own fault. He'd abandoned his pregnant boyfriend, for goodness' sake. Jett was just comforting him, being there for him. While James felt this was almost an acceptable thing to do, he really wished Jett hadn't done it.

Because it was proof of his fear. Kendall didn't need him. Not when he had Jett, and Carlos and Logan. And Katie and Mama Knight. They could all pitch in with looking after the baby. James, of course, would love to spend time with his own kid, and he hated when children grew up with only one parent, but this was easier for everyone.

James wouldn't be a good father. His own parents hadn't been very loving. Well, his mother had under her frightening exterior, but his dad never gave two shits about him. That had been one thing that brought Kendall and James closer together as children. James remembered Kendall hugging him all night when his dad had left, and then James doing the same only a year later.

And Kendall was amazing with children. He'd always looked after Katie when they were smaller, and other neighbourhood kids too. James remembered a night when he was twelve and was left to babysit his nine-month-old cousin. The baby had cried and screamed and driven him insane, and he hadn't a clue what to do. He'd ended up phoning Kendall and begging him to come over, and within twenty minutes of his arrival, the baby was sound asleep and the two had watched movies until James's family came home.

For God's sake, that incident was proof enough that James couldn't deal with having a kid. Half the time he hated kids. Sure, they were cute when they were all quiet and well-behaved, but when they got all bratty or wouldn't stop whining . . . Jesus, they drove him up the wall. But Kendall loved kids, and would make an amazing parent. James would only be holding him back. He was better off alone.

Now, if James could only believe this crap himself and just get over his stupid broken heart, life would be perfect.

**Another slight twist. I'll keep going back to James through the chapters, he won't just be forgotten. Please review!**


	6. Pt1 Chapter 6

**Basically, I'm gonna do a little flash of James and Kendall for each remaining month of the pregnancy. I think it's easier that way as there were a few things I wanted to do but it was too complicated unless I did it like this. This story is also a great exuse to write Kett and Kames at the same time XD. Enjoy!**

**Month 4 **

"Kendall, are you gonna get up at all?" Jett said softly, running his fingers through his boyfriend's hair.

Kendall didn't reply, or even open his eyes; he just snuggled closer to Jett, sighing happily. Jett chuckled, breathing in the smell of Kendall (strawberries and peaches) and trying to think of a way to get the pregnant blonde out of bed. He could hear Mrs Knight calling both of them for breakfast. She'd been surprisingly happy with him spending the night, but he didn't want to annoy her in any way. "Babe, your mom's calling us."

"I don't care," Kendall mumbled, burying his face in Jett's chest. "I'm tired."

"But . . ." Jett gave up, pulling Kendall into his arms, tenderly so he wouldn't hurt the baby. He was getting seriously paranoid about doing that, even though Kendall kept telling him he was already being gentle enough.

The door clicked open and Mrs Knight walked in. "Morning, sleepyheads." She walked over to the bed, raising her eyebrows when she saw Kendall. "Well, feel free to get up and eat if you like, Jett. I think he'll be there a while."

"It's weird," Jett said vaguely. "He's normally up before the rest of you, right?"

"It's the pregnancy," Mrs Knight said breezily. "It can tire you out, especially at this stage."

"Oh. I didn't know that."

"Well. Now you do. Come out when you want something." She left the room.

Jett snuggled into the pillow, smiling to himself. He could live with a little extra sleep.

… … …

James sat down at the bar, ordering a shot of tequila before his butt even landed on the stool. He was so glad the barman didn't seem to care what age he was. His head was hurting like crazy, and he needed to dull his senses. Though it meant he'd probably have to get a taxi home, rather than use the car his mom had just bought him. He picked up his drink and was about to take a sip when he heard someone yell, "Hey! You with the black jacket!"

James turned to see three people about his age, or maybe older sitting at a table a few feet away. There was a short redhead guy, a slim Latina girl, and a tall pale dark haired guy, who looked like the one who's yelled. The redhead beckoned him over, smiling. After a brief hesitation, James got up with his drink and walked over to them. "Hey."

"Hi!" the tall one greeted. "Sit with us! We haven't seen you around here before!"

"Oh. Well, yeah. I've just moved out, so I'm a little new to all this."

"We hear you, man," the dark one said. "David here just got his own place too. So, anyway, I'm Al, and she's Trina. And I just said he's David."

David laughed drunkenly as Al held out his hand.

James shook the guy's hand, smiling. "I'm James."

"Well, James," Trina said with a sly grin, draping a thin tan arm around his shoulder as he sat down. "Are you straight?"

"Um . . . no?"

Trina laughed obnoxiously, kissing him on the cheek. "That's hot."

"Ignore her," David said cheerfully. "She hits on every guy she sees. Which is funny, cos she's, y'know, a lezzer."

"Oh. Ok then." James smiled uncertainly while Trina laughed again. Admittedly, there was something about these kids that he liked. He didn't know exactly what age they were—maybe they were old enough to be in college—but they were fun and they seemed to like him.

He spent the whole night with them, drinking and chatting, laughing and dancing around clumsily. Did they really live like this every day? It was incredible, and he loved every minute of it. He'd never have fun like this with his old friends.

Maybe he'd been better off ditching them after all.

* * *

><p><strong>Month 5<strong>

Kendall flopped down on the couch, letting out an exhausted sigh. "I feel so fat."

Katie's eyes didn't leave her _New Town High_ script even for a second. "You're not fat, big Brother. You're pregnant."

"Yeah, but other people don't know that. There was this old woman shaking her head at me and muttering about fast food when I went out to the park yesterday." Kendall shifted his position, sitting up straighter, then he squeaked suddenly, feeling a weird bumping feeling in his stomach. "What just happened?"

"What?" Katie looked up from her script at last.

"I felt something weird. Here, give me your hand." Kendall placed her hand on the spot where he'd felt it. A few seconds later, the bumping feeling came back. "There! That!"

"Oh!" Katie started laughing. "I think the baby's kicking!"

"What? No way!" Kendall sat up straighter, feeling it again. "Ohmygod, it is!"

Katie giggled, feeling the baby kick again. "I can't wait until the baby's born. What do you wanna call it?"

"I really don't know, Baby Sister. You know I'm hopeless with names."

"Though you did talk Mom out of naming me Apple. I think that says something."

Kendall laughed. "I guess so. Though any idiot could've done it."

Katie giggled. "I can't wait to be an auntie."

… … …

James had heard about this club from a friend. He didn't even remember what it was called, that didn't matter. He was here to party. Or, to try and party, at least.

The music pounding his eardrums helped a little as he made his way towards the bar. He needed to get out, just once or twice. No big deal. When a girl appeared next to him, he didn't even notice her at first. Then she rested a hand on his shoulder, and he turned to look at her. She was wearing high heels and an extremely tight dress.

"Hi," she said, smiling at him. "You're new. Haven't seen you before."

"Oh." James forced himself to smile back. "Yeah. Um . . . and you are . . .?"

"I'm Kendall."

James's eyes widened slightly and he took a closer look at the girl. She had dark hair, long and wavy, with long blonde bangs. Her eyes were blue. Sure, she was cute. Maybe even hot. But she wasn't Kendall. Her skin was tan, not pale like Kendall's. Still, there were faint similarities. She had high cheekbones like Kendall, she was slim like Kendall. It was good enough for now.

"How about I buy you a beer?" Kendall suggested, eyelashes fluttering.

James resisted rolling his eyes and nodded, giving her a flirty smile. "I'd _love_ that."

Kendall grinned and leaned over the bar, trying to catch the barman's attention. James couldn't help watching her. She _was_ hot. Plus her dress was so tight that James really couldn't help seeing every curve when his eyes followed her outline, gaze slowly travelling downward. _Hmmph. Kendall's ass is way better._

Kendall handed him his drink, taking a swig of her own at the same time. She smirked at him, wiping her mouth with her thumb. "I never got your name."

"Oh. I'm James Diamond." James couldn't help smirking a little. "You might know me from a band?"

"Ohh. Yeah! Big Time Rush, right? Isn't there a guy in that, with like . . ."

"The same name as you? Uh huh." James gulped down his own beer. He needed another, like now. "Though, I think you're way hotter than he is." _I'm lying._

Kendall giggled in such an irritating way that James wanted to slap her. _His_ Kendall would never laugh like that. He thought it was annoying too. But his Kendall wasn't . . . well, _his_ anymore. He was Jett's. Stupid Jett.

"Wanna dance?" James asked before he could stop himself.

Kendall nodded, giving him a flirty smile and dropping her beer bottle on the bar. "I'd _love_ to." They walked onto the dance floor, surrounded by people grinding against each other, some actually performing real dance moves, while others contented themselves with practically having sex under the flashing lights.

Kendall had never been much for dancing. He was self-conscious about it, always had been. James couldn't help thinking of how he'd have to virtually drag Kendall onto the dance floor anytime they went anywhere with Carlos and Logan. Or even on their own. Even when they'd been just friends.

"_James, I'm not dancing anymore," Kendall protested, leaning against the wall with his arms folded. "I can't dance, and I __**won't**__ dance."_

"_But this is your favourite song!" James argued, tapping his foot in time to the catchy Paramore tune as he tried to convince his blonde friend to join in with the crowd._

"_No, Jamie. This is __**your**__ favourite song." Kendall shrugged at him. "You go dance, but I'm staying right here."_

"_Fine, party pooper. Suit yourself."_

Other-Kendall grinded up against him, hips swaying, hands playing with the collar of his shirt. James danced with her, all the while thinking that she really seemed like a little bit of a slut.

_The song ended, and James heard a slow one coming __on. He recognised it as 'Songbird' (that Fleetwood Mac song. Or maybe it was the Beatles?) and watched as the party-goers quickly attached themselves to their date for the night, spontaneously chose a date, or drifted off to the side with their friends. James, for once, didn't feel like dancing around with a girl (it was all fake anyway) so he made his way over to where he'd left Kendall standing. Now was as good a time as any to criticise him on being too much like Logan. He needed to loosen up a little._

_James raised his eyebrows in confusion when he saw a tall (taller than he was) dark-haired guy talking to Kendall, smiling the whole time. Kendall on the other hand looked really uncomfortable standing there near him. As James got closer, he saw the stranger try to put his arm around Kendall's shoulder, Kendall squirming out from under him. He caught words of what the guy was saying: "You sure you don't wanna dance? I'd kinda like to see you move." He gestured to all the slowdancers. "Even if it is at that pace."_

_James could see Kendall shaking his head, but this idiot didn't seem to get the message. Alright. Time for Bandana Man to save the day. Though how, he had no idea. He walked up to the two, smiling all the way. "Hey, what's going on?"_

"_You're interfering," the guy said bluntly, stepping a little closer to Kendall, who stepped closer to James. _

_James didn't know what made him say it. Still, he did have a big mouth. "Actually, you're the one interfering, man. He's with me." He wound an arm around Kendall's shoulders, smiling confidently even as he felt Kendall stiffen next to him._

"_Oh?" The guy looked like he was trying not to laugh. "So, you two are together?"_

_This time it was Kendall who replied, putting his arm around James's waist. "Yeah, we're totally together. That's what I was . . . um, trying to tell you. Yep."_

"_Hmm." He was smirking like he could see right through them. "Well, you two make a__** great**__ couple. Hope you have fun."_

_James and Kendall hurried__ away from him, crashing straight into a couple dancing together. "Sorry."_

"Sorry," James said as he bumped into someone who was doing some kind of bizarre jerky dance move. Other-Kendall was laughing at him, arm winding around his neck as they continued to twist and move in time with the music.

"What are you thinking?" she asked, smirking and batting her long mascara-clad lashes.

"Oh . . . nothing." James kept dancing along to the fast, upbeat music, letting his mind drift away yet again.

_When James put his arms around Kendall's waist, the blonde looked terrified. "James, what are you doing?"_

"_Trying to make it look convincing," James replied in a light tone, though his heart was pounding impossibly fast. "I know it's awkward, but . . . he's still looking at us."_

"_He is? Shit." Then Kendall's arms were around his neck, his head resting on James's shoulder. "Guess we'll have to wait until the song is over."_

_It turned out to be possibly the longest slow song James had ever heard. A lot longer than he remembered it. But he wanted it to keep on playing as he and Kendall just moved back and forth, bodies intertwined. "Thanks, by the way," Kendall said quietly, looking up at him. "For helping me with that guy, back there. I really don't know what I would've said if you hadn't shown up."_

"_No biggie. That's what friends are for, right?" I want to be more than friends, you idiot. Why can't you see that? I helped you because I love you too much to let anyone take you away from me, and it's so freaking obvious._

_But Kendall didn't catch on._

Other-Kendall didn't catch on either. She seemed to think the faraway, dreamy look in James's eyes was because of her, and moved in closer to him. He didn't know how to react when she kissed him, her tongue licking along his lips until he opened his mouth and kissed her back. Her tongue flicked against his as he put his arm round her waist, almost awkwardly. He didn't want to hold her, or kiss her. She was just _there_, a convenience. He wanted to kiss Kendall, and hold him. He wanted to be back on that dance floor from that night in Freshman Year, dancing to Fleetwood Mac. Still, that wasn't going to happen.

This was why when Other-Kendall took him by the hand and led him away from everyone else, James followed her outside to the dark corridor, which was completely deserted. They walked around the corner and out the back door into the cool night air. Kendall rested a hand on his stomach, pushing him lightly against the wall, kissing him again. He kissed back without hesitation this time, just thinking of Kendall, how he'd felt in his arms, so vulnerable, pliable, how they'd kissed that day he fought with Jett. And every day that followed.

When Other-Kendall unbuttoned his jeans, he didn't even protest. He was back in 2J, with Kendall, not here with this other, female, sluttier version of him. Other-Kendall had fallen to her knees in front of his now naked lower body and was licking at his cock slowly, humming to herself as she tickled his hips were her long manicured nails. She kept at it until James had hardened completely, before taking his whole cock in her mouth.

_Kendall licked as James's dick, before pulling off and laughing at his expression. "You're dreaming, Jamie. This isn't real; it never happened. But I can keep going, if you want . . ."_

"Kendall," James groaned, hands braced against the wall. "Ohh . . . _yes_ . . ."

_Kendall smiled up at him, beautiful green eyes flashing playfully. "You like this, Jamie?" he asked sweetly. "You want more, don't you? More of me . . ."_

"Oh . . . God, please, _more_ . . ."

"_Well, then, why don't we take this somewhere else?" Kendall got to his feet, hand tangling in James's hair as their hips brushed together. He slowly leaned forward, lips resting on James neck, leaving little kisses here and there, biting down occasionally. "Love me, Jamie . . ."_

"Kendall!" James came into the slutty Other-Kendall's mouth, legs shaking beneath him. Other-Kendall swallowed it all, licking her lips seductively as she pulled off him, getting to her feet. James held out a hand to steady her when she tottered a little in her high heels.

"You like that?" Other-Kendall asked, smiling like a cat. "There's plenty more where that came from."

_God, you're a slut._ But James smiled back and said. "Well, that's good to know. Maybe you can show me sometime?"

That was when Other-Kendall gave him her phone number. He'd probably never call her, anyway. He was glad to get back to his car, away from her. As soon as he sat in the car, he slumped back in the seat for a minute or two, eyes shut.

"_James, your head is in the clouds," Kendall giggled, tugging James by the arm along the sidewalk. Living in a small Minnesota town meant they walked everywhere._

"_Oh? Sorry; I was just thinking about that jerk back in the club."_

"_Ugh, him." Kendall rolled his eyes. "Asshole. Hope I never see him again." They stopped outside number 7. "Well, this is my stop. I'll text you tomorrow? We can go to the park with the guys or something."_

"_Sounds great." James bowed, acting all formal. "I look forward to it, m'lady."_

_Kendall laughed, poking him in the ribs. "Shut up. And goodnight. See you tomorrow."_

_James smiled as he watched Kendall go inside, before making his own way home. He needed to remember to thank that dark haired asshole one day._

As James started the car, he found one of his homemade CDs in the glove compartment, putting it in the CD player. He skipped to Track 4. The piano intro soothed him a little; he smiled to himself as the singing started.

**_For you, there'll be no more crying, for you the sun will be shining, and I feel that when I'm with you it's alright, I know its right._**

James really loved this song.

"_. . . and then James just came over and got rid of him," Kendall was telling Logan. James and Carlos were sprawled on a park bench, while Kendall and Logan sat on the grass. "It was pretty funny, actually."_

_James grinned. "Yeah. It was awesome." He bowed again. "And the least I could do for a fair lady such as yourself. M'lady."_

_Kendall ended up chasing James around the park for a good ten minutes. James couldn't stop smiling._

**_To you I'll give the world, to you I'll never be cold, cos I feel that when I'm with you it's alright, I know __its right._**

James sang along as he drove home. He knew all the words by now. "All the songbirds are singing . . ."

"_Jerk," Kendall giggled as he pinned James down on the ground. "Stop calling me a lady."_

"_Ok, ok. Anything for you, blondie."_

_Kendall was smiling even as he walked away again, back to the others._

". . . and I love you, I love you, I love you like never before."

**Like? Hate? Review and let me know! I have the next 2 chapters finished already, so I might update again very soon. ;) Again, please review!**


	7. Pt1 Chapter 7

**Month 6 **

Mrs Knight walked into the apartment, armed with a large grocery bag. She dumped it on the counter, taking out the contents one by one. First there was all the normal stuff she'd aimed to get. At the bottom was the stuff Kendall had asked for. She stared at it all in utter bemusement; lettuce, ketchup, strawberry yogurt, waffles, and hot sauce. What was Kendall going to do with all of this?

She sighed and shook her head, deciding she didn't want to know. "Kendall, I'm back with the shopping!"

Kendall appeared from his room, along with Logan and Carlos. "Hey, Mom," he greeted, smiling. "Thanks. I'll help you with the rest of that."

"No, you shouldn't—" Mrs Knight began, but Kendall had already taken some of the groceries in his hands and was packing them away. "Kendall, I don't want you to push yourself too much."

Kendall laughed. Mrs Knight couldn't help noticing how healthy her son looked now. The sad look in his eyes from the day of James's departure had vanished. He looked more alive, with a healthy glow surrounding him. "Mom, it's just a bit of food. No big deal."

Mrs Knight sighed, rolling her eyes. "Well, here's _your_ food. Try not to make anything too disgusting." She disappeared into her room to read for a while.

Kendall popped two waffles in the toaster, opening the carton of yogurt at the same time. While he was eating his waffles with yogurt, Kendall decided something was missing. Logan watched in disgust as he squirted some ketchup on top of the waffles. Carlos stood in front of the counter, taking a fork out of the drawer. "Can I taste it?"

Logan looked horrified as Kendall nodded, holding the plate out. "It's really good."

Carlos and Kendall shared the sickening looking meal, Carlos still making sure Kendall got most of it. And when there was a knock on the door, Carlos leaped up to answer it before Kendall could even move. "Hey, Jett! Come on in."

Jett walked in, smiling when he saw Kendall and walking straight over to him. "Hey, Kendall. How're you doing?"

Kendall smiled back. "I'm great."

"You've got a little yogurt on your lip," Jett said with a grin, bending down and kissing him gently. "There, I got it." Carlos made puking noises, while Logan cooed at them half affectionately, half disapprovingly. Jett licked his own lip, looking confused. "I think I can taste ketchup. What were you eating?"

"Lunch," Kendall replied vaguely, smirking to himself.

Jett rolled his eyes, sitting down next to him. "So, is it weird food cravings now?"

Logan burst into laughter. "How did you guess?"

"We all know Kendall would never eat yogurt the same time as ketchup. He'd go on about bad health and shit."

Kendall elbowed him in the ribs, laughing. "Jerk."

… … …

James rang the doorbell of Al's apartment, bouncing up and down slightly on his toes. He could hear heavy metal playing inside. Maybe they hadn't heard him? But then Al opened the door, grinning at him. "James, man! You made it!"

"Hey," James greeted, walking in. Trina and David were sprawled on the frayed couch, both holding smoking cigarettes. As James sat next to them, he noticed Al fishing around in his pocket, his own cigarette dangling from his mouth. "I knew you'd come once I mentioned the weed. Here," he said, taking out a joint and handing it to James. "All yours."

James looked at it, feeling a burst of hesitation surge through him. This was it. Was he really brave enough? He'd always sworn he'd never do drugs, _ever_. Now he was about to. But, it was only once. How bad could it be?

James swallowed, before taking Al's lighter, lighting up and taking a long drag. He sighed in satisfaction. _Nice. _He did it again, thinking that drugs really weren't as bad as they sounded. This felt _good_; what was all the fuss about?

"So," Trina was saying to David, pausing to take a drag of her own joint. "How's life going for you, man?"

David laughed. "Well, my girlfriend is a bitch, my grades suck, my job sucks, but, y'know, I've still got basketball, so it's all good." He put his feet up on the coffee table, lolling back.

Al chuckled, eyes narrowed in mock concentration. "Jesus, sometimes I wonder what you're really addicted to. The pot or that fucking basketball."

Trina laughed, and James did too, though his stomach twisted at the word _addicted. _He'd seen photos of addicts. He'd met one, once. His eyes were red and he was ghostly white. He'd been so thin because all his cash had been spent on crack. James stared at his joint in panic, almost expecting it to cast some sort of spell on him, turn him into one of those poor people with no life.

"Something wrong, man?" David asked casually, taking another drag. James looked at him closely. He looked healthy enough, and happy. Maybe he'd be ok.

"Nah," James replied, going back to his joint. "Nothing's wrong."

He'd worry about consequences another day.

* * *

><p><strong>Month 7<strong>

Kendall couldn't stop fidgeting. Stupid pregnancy. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Why did this have to happen to him? His doctor Ellen had warned him about this. Hormones. Ellen seemed to find his terror on the subject _funny_.

It had to be the least funny thing he'd ever experienced. So many little things set him off, things that he'd never normally react to. But now at least twice a day, he'd feel that now familiar twitch in his groin, and he'd have to run to the bathroom or whatever other private place he could find. Only soon after getting rid of his problem, it'd come back again, worse than before. He hated it.

Today he was sitting on the couch of 2J, when Carlos walked into the apartment, straight over to the refrigerator. He took a root beer out of the fridge, stretching slightly. All Kendall had to see was the way his muscles clenched and his heart quickened, his dick started to harden and his brain started going fuzzy all at once. For God's sake, Kendall thought furiously as he got up and stormed into his room. He didn't even like Carlos any more than as a friend. Why was this happening?

He flopped down onto his bed, shutting his eyes and hoping his raging hormones would calm down a little now that there was nothing around to arouse him. He started thinking of dead puppies, and James leaving, and spiders, and James leaving, and his dick started to soften.

He heard the front door of the apartment opening, and Carlos chatting happily to someone. The someone sounded like Jett. _Oh no_. Jett was the worst for this. Anything the actor did, _anything_, could make him even hornier than he already was. The door of his room opened, and Jett was standing there. "Hey, Kendall. You wanna hang out?"

Kendall whimpered, pulling at his jeans and rolling over onto his side. "Jett, I'm kind of not in the mood right now."

"Why? Are you sick?" Jett sounded concerned. "If you need anything, I . . ."

"No, I'm f-fine. I just . . . I kind of wanna be alone right now."

"Oh." Jett sounded hurt. "Ok. I guess I'll go, then."

Kendall sighed, cursing his conscience. "Jett, I'm sorry. You don't have to leave."

"Well then, what's bothering you?"

"Fine, fine," Kendall grumbled. He rolled onto his back. "I'm horny, alright? It's driving me crazy and I can't _do_ anything about it."

To Kendall's infuriation, Jett started to laugh. "Jett! This isn't funny!"

"I know, I know, but Kendall, the look on your face is totally priceless." Jett smirked at him, walking over to the door and shutting it fully, before locking it. "You want me to help you out with that, baby? If you do, we don't want anyone interrupting us."

Kendall's eyes widened at this suggestion. He and Jett had never been that intimate before, and he wasn't sure if he wanted it just yet. Then again, his hormones were gone wild, and his own hand just wasn't good enough anymore. So when Jett stepped closer to where he was lying on the bed, he reached out and took the darker teen by the hand, pulling him over.

Jett got onto the bed, straddling Kendall's waist, helping sit up and take his shirt off. Kendall lay back down as Jett leaned over his rounded stomach to rest his lips against the blonde's neck. He licked a trail along Kendall's throat, twisting at his nipples with his fingers as he left little kisses on his collarbone. Kendall moaned loudly, not really caring if the other residents of 2J heard him.

"Jett . . . _more_."

Jett chuckled. "You're cute when you're horny." But he complied, unbuttoning Kendall's jeans (he wore much baggier ones at the moment, but they still looked great on him) and taking them off, along with his boxers. He leaned down and took Kendall's whole erection in his mouth. Kendall yelped, breath becoming ragged as one of his hands tangled in Jett's hair. "Oh God . . ."

Jett pulled off for a second. "You got lube? And a condom?"

There was no hiding what they planned to do now. Kendall just nodded and reached towards the bottom drawer of the nightstand. Jett pushed his hand away, getting off the bed and taking them out, before quickly getting back on the bed. He sat between Kendall's spread legs, spilling a little lube onto his fingers, before pushing two in at once.

Kendall thrust down on Jett's fingers, feeling like such a slut and really not caring. When Jett hit his prostate and bent down to suck on his cock again, he just became a shuddery mess, moaning and panting as Jett got a third finger inside him, stretching him quickly. "Jett," he gasped, unable to hide the blush on his face. "I need you, _now_."

Jett nodded, pulling his fingers out. He stripped in what Kendall was sure must be record time, then Kendall heard the ripping sound of the condom wrapper, and then something cold pressing against his ass. Kendall groaned as Jett slid into him, wrapping his legs around his boyfriend's waist. But it was still their first time ever doing this, and he couldn't help feeling a little out of place for a moment or two. But then Jett started moving and he lost all sense of thought, moaning as they started thrusting their hips against each other.

Kendall's hand were gripping Jett's shoulders tightly, moaning louder when Jett took hold of Kendall's hips equally tightly. Then suddenly Kendall squealed, feeling several kicks and punches in his stomach. Jett didn't stop moving, but he shot Kendall a puzzled look. Kendall took one of Jett's hands and placed it on his stomach. The dark haired boy laughed when he felt it, his thrusts were becoming uneven and a lot harder. He hit Kendall's sweet spot every time, slowly reaching between their bodies to stroke Kendall's dick painfully slowly.

It still wasn't long before Kendall finally went over the edge, his seed spilling all over his stomach. He lay there, trying to return his breathing to normal as Jett rammed in and out of him another couple of times, before reaching his own release. Kendall reached for the tissues on the nightstand as Jett pulled out of him, taking the condom off and throwing it in the wastebasket.

Kendall cleaned them both off before slumping back on the pillow. The baby was still kicking a little, but it was sort of a soothing feeling. Jett crawled up and lay down next to him, draping an arm loosely around his waist and kissing him gently. "Feeling better?"

Kendall chuckled, kissing Jett on the nose. "Much. Thanks."

"No problem." Jett's voice lowered slightly as he pulled Kendall closer to him. "And if you ever have this problem again, _please_ don't hesitate to ask."

… … …

James put the DVD in the player, sitting down on the couch and picking up the remote. He turned the TV on, sitting back and watching carefully.

Kendall's face appeared on the screen, smiling and laughing. "James, will you get that camera out of my face?"

"No, I don't think so. We're on our grand tour of our new Palmwoods apartment, yes? Come on, be my guide."

"Fine, fine." Kendall's green eyes were twinkling brightly as he walked into the kitchen, looking over at the camera. "So, this is, the kitchen, obviously . . ."

"_. . . where you do kitchen-y things."_

_James laughed, the camera shaking in his hands. "Can't you do better than that, blondie?"_

"_Well, I'm not born to be a star like you, Jamie! I don't do spotlights."_

"_Ok, ok. Well, show me around our fantastic re-decorated room?"_

"_You know the way, why don't you show me? Give me the camera."_

_James handed it to Kendall and skipped down the hallway, opening the door to their room. "Ok, now to show our inexperienced cameraman—"_

"_Hey!"_

"—_how to give a real tour!"_

_James rushed around the room, showing every detail of the closet, the floor, the chest-of-drawers and the contents under the bed. "See? I'm showing you everything!"_

"_Yes, James. Because everyone wants to see your boxers on the floor."_

_James laughed, snatching the camera off Kendall and pushing him down onto his bed. "You need to lay off the sarcasm, Kendork. You know what this means."_

"_Oh no! Please, have mercy!" Kendall curled up, trying to shield himself as James jumped on top of him, tickling him with one hand and pointing the camera at him with the other. "Pay attention, viewers. This is what happens when you mock James Diamond . . ."_

Kendall was writhing on the bed, the camera zooming in slightly as he squealed and laughed hysterically. "Jamie, please, I can't take it anymore!" he spluttered, dimples showing in his cheek as he smiled, eyes gazing up at James and the camera. James sighed as this recording came to an end and another came up. This was how he wanted to spend every weekend. He saw the next recording was dated further back, before they moved to California.

This time James himself appeared, pointing the camera at himself. "Hey! Welcome to the camping trip of the century, starring me—" the camera turned to look at Carlos, "Carlitos—" then Logan, "the Loginator—" the camera found Kendall's smiling face. "And Kendork!"

Kendall stuck his tongue out at the screen. "Stop calling me that! I mean, how many other nicknames do you have that you could use instead?" . . .

"_I dunno, let's count," James chuckled, sitting on the floor of the tent set up in the woods behind Logan's house. "We have Kenny, Blondie, Ken-doll, Beanie, KK, Kendahlia, Kendizzle, Kendog, __Hipster, Kitty, Mr Skinny Jeans, and . . . um . . . there are probably more. They'll come back to me."_

"_So now you see! Out of all those names, Kendork is the only one I can't stand. Can't you use another?"_

"_No problem, Beanie. Anything for you."_

_James turned the camera off and pulled Kendall down next to him. "Hey, I remember another nickname! Shorty!"_

"_What?" Kendall looked appalled. "I'm not short!"_

"_Not now," James grinned. "But before High School, you were a shrimp. I mean, really. You were smaller than Carlos."_

_Kendall blushed while Carlos giggled. "It's true. You weren't just short, you were really slim. Kind of . . . scrawny?"_

_Kendall scowled, folding his arms. "Fine. I was short."_

"_You better believe it, Shorty."_

_Kendall got up, rolling his eyes, and left the tent. Logan quickly got up and followed him. James glanced at Carlos, frowning. "Did I upset him?" This thought was so horrifying it made him shudder._

_Carlos just shrugged and said, "Let's go find out." He smiled. "Bring your camera."_

_James picked up the camera and turned it on, pointing it at Carlos. Carlos waved cheerily. "Welcome back to Camping Trip of the Century! Even though we're like five feet away from the gate to Logan's backyard. Ahem, anyway! We appear to be in the middle of a crisis because James is an insensitive idiot, so, we're gonna go see what Loginator and Kendog are doing. Follow me!"_

_James did, stepping outside the tent. He heard Carlos yelling, and for a second he didn't know why. Then he felt some sort of cold shock, and his clothes were dripping wet. "What just happened?"_

_He looked up to see Logan and Kendall in stitches, holding big bottles of water. Carlos was also soaking, staring at them in amazement. "You totally set us up!" James yelled, not even realising he was still filming the whole thing. "Cheaters!"_

_Logan laughed harder, gasping, "Yeah, but . . . oh . . . the expression on your face . . . I'm dying . . ."_

_James stormed back into the tent, sitting down. The other three guys followed him in, sitting down too. "You have to admit, it was funny," Carlos said, smiling._

_James glared at him, then he was laughing too, camera shaking in his hand. He pointed it at Logan, who said, "More later from Camping Trip of the Century!"_

_James switched the camera off, sighing. "It's gonna take a while to get dry. Oh well."_

_Logan sat down across from him, chuckling. "Ok, what do we do next?"_

"_I dunno," Carlos replied. "Time check?"_

"_It's almost 11:30," Kendall said, glancing at his watch._

"_Movie time!" Carlos yelled, grabbing his laptop. "I brought 'Final Destination' with me!"_

_They all sat down in front of the laptop as Carlos started the DVD. Logan didn't look particularly happy about the choice of film but he couldn't really argue. He just hid behind a pillow during the scary parts._

_James himself loved scary movies, and was grinning at the computer screen for most of it. By the time the movie ended, Carlos was giggling, Logan was shaking and, __**whoa**__. James realised Kendall had fallen asleep on his shoulder. At first, all he could feel was pure joy at the feeling of Kendall's head there, the fact that he was needed. Then he realised that he was supposed to text his mom (stupid possessive parenting) and his phone was on the other side of the tent._

_Well, he could just not bother with the texting, but his mom would probably throw him in a meat grinder. But, for God's sake, Kendall was asleep on him! He wasn't going anywhere! "Hey, Carlos," James called quietly. "Can you get me my phone? It's over there."_

_Carlos crawled over to get it, handing it out to him. "Here."_

_James reached for it slowly, frowning when he couldn't reach it. "Carlos, closer!"_

_Carlos giggled, throwing it at him. "Sorry. Horror makes me hyper."_

_James grabbed the phone and sent a quick text, leaving the phone on his lap. He turned to look at Kendall, smiling to himself. His bangs were hanging in his eyes, his chest moving ever so slowly as he breathed. He was so beautiful. It just wasn't fair! Sure, Kendall was gay, he'd just admitted it to them, but he didn't know that James was bi and had a gigantic crush on him. Ugh. All James could do was relish these moments when Kendall needed him, sometimes not even consciously. _

_Naturally, it was only as he thought this that his phone beeped loudly and Kendall stirred. Shit. Kendall half-opened his eyes, yawning like a little kitty cat. "Mmm?" He lifted his head a little, seeming to spot James for the first time. "Oh." He blushed slightly. "Sorry." He sat up a little straighter._

"_No, it's ok," James said quickly. He cleared his throat, deciding he shouldn't sound so eager. "I mean, go back to sleep if you want."_

"_Ok . . ." But instead of lying down or getting his sleeping bag like James expected, Kendall rested his head on James's shoulder again, snuggling a little closer to him. "You've got a comfy shoulder," he mumbled before he was asleep again._

_James grinned to himself, before lying down slowly, draping an arm around Kendall's waist to pull him down too. He rested his head on one of the pillows they'd bought, Kendall's head still on top of him. Carlos and Logan were laughing as they lay down too. "You two would make a great couple."_

"_Don't be ridiculous," James snapped, inside thinking 'YES! YAY!'_

_At half two in the morning, James woke up suddenly. He wasn't sure why. Kendall's head was still in the same spot, one of his hands now resting on James's chest. Given the fact that he was asleep, he probably wasn't even aware of his actions. James still felt a blush tint his cheeks. Logan and Carlos were sleeping too, snuggled up in separate sleeping bags. James picked the camera off the floor of the tent, turning it back on._

"_One last shot of Camping Trip of the Century," he whispered, pointing it at himself . . ._

"Everyone else is asleep. We'll be heading home tomorrow. I don't think camping is for us. This tent is kind of cold." James laughed, eyes lighting up even in the dark. "Bye."

That recording ended too, and so did the DVD. James lay down on the couch, staring at the ceiling. There were so many other moments he wished so desperately to have on camera, to watch again and again when he felt particularly lonely in this new life of his. Moments that were pointless, really, but still meant the world to him. Like that time when he and Kendall had gone to the carnival when Carlos was grounded and Logan was studying.

"_James, I don't like it up here!" Kendall whined as the Ferris wheel stopped. "Why did you make me come up here? You know I hate heights!"_

"_Kendall, there's nothing to be scared of," James reassured him, winding a protective arm around his shoulders. "Just look up at the sky or something, if you don't want to look down. But seriously, there's an amazing view up here." James wasn't talking about any sights outside their little seat, but Kendall didn't need to know that._

_Kendall just leaned slightly closer to him when the wheel started moving again. "I can't wait to get off this thing."_

_When the wheel stopped and the door opened, Kendall practically leaped out. "Oh, thank God! I'm still alive!"_

_James just laughed, pulling him along by the arm. "C'mon, let's go on the water chute. I'll hold your hand if you get scared."_

"_Haha, jerk."_

He wanted to relive those moments again and again, no matter how short they were. When Kendall needed him, he always wanted to be there. James shut his eyes, grimacing. Kendall didn't need him anymore. He didn't, he didn't, he didn't . . .

**Sorry to those who hate me now. :( It's all part of the storyline, though! So, reviews? Both love and hate is acceptable, just don't be too harsh.**


	8. Pt1 Chapter 8

**Okey dokey. Chapter 8!**

**Month 8**

Kendall fell onto Jett's bed, groaning. "Ugh . . ." His feet and back were killing him. He couldn't even _see_ his stupid feet, let alone try and rub them. His stomach was the size of a submarine capable of hosting a small (or large) family. Well, maybe he was exaggerating, but _God_. Why didn't anyone warn him about this? It was horrible. "Why won't you just come out of there?" Kendall moaned at his stomach, giggling in spite of himself when he felt the baby kick. "You're making me hurt all over."

Jett had gone to do some shooting for the show. Kendall had spent the night and just decided to wait for Jett to come back. He would only be gone for two hours tops, he said. Which was fine. Kendall wasn't going anywhere with a stomach this size. He'd just watched TV for a little while, then tried to get off the couch, finding he couldn't. He'd ended up practically rolling off onto the floor, then struggling to his feet. Why did babies have to be so _big?_

Jett walked into the apartment. "Hey, Kendall, we finished early, so . . ." Jett stopped, looking at the empty apartment. "Kendall? Kendall, where are you?" Jett looked around again as he shut the door, starting to get a little worried. Kendall had to _waddle _everywhere; how far could he have gone? Had he gone home? Then he heard a weak moan coming from his room. He hurried in, spotting Kendall lying on his bed, eyes shut, hand on his forehead. "Kendall, baby? Are you alright?"

Kendall opened his eyes, smiling feebly at him. "My feet hurt," he mumbled at last, blushing furiously.

"Oh. That's all? I can fix that." Jett chuckled, bending down and giving Kendall a quick kiss, before moving to the foot of the bed, kneeling down and taking Kendall's feet in his hands. He started rubbing at them gently with the tips of his fingers, pressing down occasionally. "Feel any better now?"

Kendall sighed. "Yeah. Thanks, sweetie."

Jett grinned at him. "I'll give your back a rub after this. And yeah, I know you didn't mention it. Your face says it all."

Kendall giggled. "You know me too well."

_James knew you, too._

Kendall blinked. He had no idea where this little voice had come from, but he wasn't gonna let it convince him of anything.

_James ditched me. Maybe h__e knew me, but I definitely don't know him as well I thought._

_Yes, you do. I'm sure you can think of many reasons for him to leave._

_Of course I can, but he could've talked to me about it. It doesn't mean I'm not mad at him. And I'm happy with Jett. He's so sweet to me, and understanding._

_He's just a brainless pretty boy._

_And James isn't?_

_You know he isn't._

_Jett isn't either! And I like him! So shut up!_

_Jett isn't your baby's father, is he?_

_Ok, that was really low._

Kendall half sat up, Jett looking over at him. "Something wrong, Kendall?"

"No, nothing. I'm just . . . tired, I guess."

Jett grinned at him, crawling over and leaning down to kiss him. "You wanna sleep for a while? I'll stay here with you."

Kendall giggled, winding an arm around Jett's neck. "That'd be nice."

Jett smiled, draping an arm loosely around Kendall's waist. "G'night, blondie."

Kendall curled up against Jett's chest, smiling at nothing. "G'night, Jett."

… … …

James heard a knock on his door. He only heaved himself out of bed to answer it after the fourth series of hard, loud taps. He threw the door open, rubbing at his eyes. "Yeah, what?"

"Wow. Nice to see you're still so well-mannered, Jamiebear."

James's eyes widened. "Mom? What are you doing here?"

"What, I'm giving you funds for half your life now and I can't even visit?" Brooke Diamond asked, arms folded. "I bought you a car and got you a license, sweetheart. You owe me some quality time."

"Oh. Yeah, I guess. Come in, Mom." James stepped aside and allowed her to walk in. As usual, Brooke was wearing a posh business suit, her hair and makeup picture perfect. "So, how's work, Mom?"

"Oh, alright. You?"

"Alright."

Brooke rolled her eyes. "Working a cash register must be riveting."

James folded his arms, staring at the ground.

"I was on the phone to Jen the other day—"

"What? Mom!"

"Don't interrupt. She said that the boys miss you."

"Yeah, I'm sure."

"Easy on the sarcasm," Brooke scolded. "I'm serious. And, you know, they are your best friends—"

"I have new friends now."

"—and I'm sure they'd forgive you if you just—"

"No."

"What?"

"I can't go back, Mom," James argued. "Kendall's dating Jett; he doesn't want me anymore."

"It's not even about him wanting you. It's about him and the baby _needing _you."

"But they don't need me either! Kendall has Jett, and Carlos and Logan, and Mrs Knight and Katie. And the baby has them too. It's all a big picture of a happy family and I'm not in it anymore!"

"And that's your own fault for leaving! Your dad was never meant to be a parent, and no one knows that better than I do. But he stuck around for a long time; he waited until you were eight to ditch us. Your child isn't even born yet and you're already gone."

"Well, then I take after my dad! I know I'll never make a good parent, and that kid is better off without me!"

"No, James! I think you just couldn't handle the pressure of being a parent! Life is always one big party for you, and that was gonna change when you had to tie yourself down to one person!"

"I'd have no problem with tying myself down, especially not with Kendall! I love him!"

"Ok, so it's the child you don't want to devote yourself to! You don't want a kid!"

"Yes, fine! I didn't want a kid! I never even expected that to happen! If I knew it would, there's no way I'd have been so stupid! I don't want to wake up at two in the morning because of a screaming baby, I don't want to change diapers and be constantly vigilant, I just can't deal with that! Kendall can, but I can't!"

They were both silent. Then James spoke again. "I'm not going back. You can accept that, or you can leave now."

Brooke sighed. "Ok. You're my son, and I'll support every decision, even if I disagree with them."

James nodded, smiling at her. "Thank you." He sat down on the couch, and she sat next to him. She noticed the smile on his face looked a little forced.

"Jamie, is something wrong?"

To her surprise, James burst into tears, hiding his face in his hands. "I'm s-sorry . . ."

Brooke gave her son a hug, stroking his hair softly as he sobbed into her shoulder. "It's ok, sweetie, just let it out . . ."

"I miss them s-so m-much. I love him, but he doesn't love me anymore. I can't b-bear it. It hurts too much."

Brooke finally understood why James wouldn't go back. For once, a member of the powerful Diamond family was scared of rejection. Wonders would never cease.

* * *

><p><strong>Month 9<strong>

"We'll be back on Monday," Mrs Knight said as she picked her bag off the floor. "No parties while we're gone. Especially you, Kendall. Don't forget to call Mrs Duncan if there are any problems." She kissed the three boys goodbye, then her and Katie left.

"So, we have a whole weekend to ourselves," Carlos said cheerfully. "What's first?"

"Studying," Logan said. "Now that I'm aiming for my career in medicine, I'm gonna have to work harder."

"Sleeping," Kendall said dully.

Carlos groaned. "Logan, you're already in thanks to Dr Hollywood. And Kendall, you're not due for another two weeks; can't you have some fun before you become a full-time parent?"

Logan sighed. "Just because I'm in doesn't mean I don't have to work. Maybe you should start thinking about a career to pursue; you know you can't be a superhero."

"And I can't just go out and have fun when I'm the size of half a blimp," Kendall added. "I'd like to, but I can't. I might hurt the baby, anyway."

Carlos sighed. "Ok, ok. Logan, go study. Kendall, go take a nap. But tomorrow, we'll do something fun—even if we don't even take our butts off the couch, _ok Kendall?_"

Carlos had to say he didn't mind much. He could live with being on his own for a while. Though he couldn't help his heart sinking a little when Kendall waddled into his room, yawning, and Logan went into his room, his thinking face on.

It was almost noon on Sunday when it happened. Kendall was sitting on his bed, reading a book his mom and given him, all about little kids, and their behaviour, and how to handle them. He'd been a little offended that she'd been so sure he would need it, but he figured it might be useful. He looked around his room, smiling to himself at the little changes that had been made for when the baby arrived. A crib in the middle of the room. A toy box in the corner. And the bottom drawer of his closet filled with baby clothes, diapers and anything else needed. It all seemed so real now.

Kendall was thirsty, so he pulled himself up to his feet and was just walking towards the door when he stopped, clutching his stomach. The baby kicked him hard the same time he felt something tricking down his leg. _Shit. Not now._

He stumbled out of his room. Logan was at the pool, but he spotted Carlos on the couch, playing some sort of mindless video game. He let out a whimper of pain as he felt the first contraction. He had to get to the hospital, like _now_. "Carlos—"

"In a second, Kendall, I'm almost on the last level."

"But—"

"Look, whatever it is, I think it can wait another minute."

"No, it can't!"

"Kendall, I know you're moody and all but—"

"CARLOS! MY WATER FUCKING BROKE!"

Carlos shrieked, dropping his controller on the floor. He leaped to his feet, running over to Kendall. "Are you sure?"

"Of course I'm sure!" Kendall snapped. He winced as he felt another contraction. "Please, I need the hospital!"

"Ok, c'mon." Carlos helped Kendall out the door, grabbing the keys to the Big Time Rush mobile and his phone, going to speed dial. "Logan, you need to meet me by the car, now! Kendall's having the baby."

He hung up straight away and led Kendall to the elevator. "Kendall, you're gonna be fine, alright? Just breathe, in and out, in and out . . ."

"I know how to breathe you idiot!" Kendall snarled, whimpering in pain. "Oh, Carli, I'm sorry . . ."

"No, it's fine. I know you don't mean it."

When they got to the car, Logan was there, with Jett. "He has to come too," Logan said to Carlos's questioning glances.

They got Kendall into the car, Jett sitting next to him while Logan and Carlos got in the front. All the way to the hospital, Kendall groaned and panted and screamed occasionally. "Logan, step on it!"

"I can't break the speed limit," Logan said, getting into a panic.

"Screw the speed limit! I have a baby that wants to come out _now!_"

Carlos was on the phone again, talking frantically. "Yes, we're going there now . . . no, take your time, we're all here with him anyway . . . ok, see you soon." He hung up. "Kendall, your mom's on her way back from San Diego. They'll meet us at the hospital once they get here."

"Ok—AGGHHHH!"

Once at the hospital, they got Kendall into a wheelchair and hurried him to the maternity wing. Carlos practically leaped over the reception desk. "He's having a baby!"

The receptionist glanced at Kendall, and nodded. "Alright, we have a free ward just down there, third door on the right. If you wouldn't mind taking him in there, and I'll send a nurse in to you shortly."

Jett and Carlos lifted Kendall onto the bed in the middle of the room. "The nurse is on her way," Logan repeated, smiling. "It's gonna be fine."

Kendall smiled back, then screamed, writhing in pain as he got another contraction. "Oh God!"

Two nurses came into the room, handing everyone scrubs, which they quickly put on. "Ok, let's get started." She quickly got Kendall ready, changing his clothes before hooking his legs up. "Alright, Kendall. It's not a good idea to try a c-section because you're too dilated already. We could give you some medication, but it'd take a few minutes and-"

"Oh, I don't care. I just want it _out_ . . ." Kendall broke off and moaned, clutching his stomach.

The nurse hid her smile and stood at the foot of the bed. "Alright, push."

Kendall took a deep breath and pushed, screaming when the pain worsened. He gritted his teeth and pushed again, trying not to let the tears fall. It hurt so much, but he wanted his baby so badly . . . he _needed_ his baby. He pushed again, unable to hold the cry of pain in this time. "Oh, this is horrible!"

"Kendall, you can do this," Jett said soothingly, wincing when Kendall squeezed his hand so hard it turned purple. "It'll be over soon enough."

It wasn't. Kendall lay there for hours, pushing and screaming, body jerking and trembling. Jett and Logan's hands had gone numb at this point, and when Jett quickly checked his phone for the time he saw it was 6pm; he was two hours late for shooting. Oh well. He also saw five missed calls from his manager. He ignored them. It didn't matter right now.

Kendall was sobbing, but not stopping even for a second. He just kept pushing, kept screaming. "OH MY GOD HOW DO GIRLS _DO _THIS!"

"It's ok, Kendall, just keep going . . ."

Carlos was watching the entire procedure with wide eyes, both grossed out and fascinated by it. When Kendall screamed again, he tore his eyes away and looked back at his face. Kendall's face was gleaming with sweat, he was shaking and panting as he struggled to push the baby out. At one point the nurse chirped happily, "You're doing great; the baby's crowning!" But Carlos didn't want to look. He pushed the sweaty hair of Kendall's forehead, smiling in encouragement.

"C'mon Kenny, you're almost there."

The pain was at its worst and Kendall's screams echoed around the room. "AGGHHH! I hate James! I HATE HIM!"

"Yelling will make you feel better," Jett said, remembering this from when his mother had his two little sisters. Though half of it was because he wanted to hear Kendall rant about James.

"He's so stupid! He _did _this to me! He's not even here, the horny jackass!" Kendall pushed again. "I FUCKING HATE HIM!"

Carlos and Logan privately agreed with what Kendall was yelling. They just kept encouraging him. They needed to hear someone say it all aloud.

"I want this thing _out of here!_" Kendall screamed, giving one last push, one last painful effort. Suddenly he heard crying, and the pain was pretty much gone.

"It's a girl, Mr Knight. Congratulations."

Kendall tried to sit up and failed, falling back against the pillow. His eyes were half shut, and everything seemed echoed. The voices talking around him, the baby crying, the beeping sounds from the machines. He was so tired everything seemed blurred. He lay there for another while, trying to get his breath back.

The nurses were cleaning the baby off, cutting the cord before wrapping her up in a little pink blanket. "Is the father of the baby here?" one of them asked, picking the baby up.

Logan bit his lip, shaking his head silently.

"Oh. Ok, then." She turned to Carlos, who was standing closest to her. "Would you like to hold her?"

Carlos nodded enthusiastically. "Can I?" The nurse held her out to him, smiling. Carlos took the tiny girl in his arms, feeling tears build up in his eyes as he cradled her gently. "Oh, she's so cute . . ."

"Carli . . ." Carlos turned around to see Kendall holding out his arms. Carlos hurried over and handed him the baby. Kendall was sitting up straighter now, smiling at his minute-old daughter. "I love you," he couldn't help whispering to her. "So much."

"What's her name?" Logan asked.

Kendall, blinked dazedly, realising he still didn't know. "Um . . . ok, names?"

Logan just laughed, walking towards the door. "I need to find your family. I think they're waiting outside."

A few minutes later, Logan came back, Mrs Knight and Katie hurrying in behind him. Katie was ecstatic. "Is it a boy or a girl? Can I see it?"

"Girl," Kendall replied. He held her out, almost reluctant to put her down even for a second. "Do you wanna hold her?"

Katie took the baby in her arms, smiling in awe at her. "She looks a lot like you. Though she looks a little like—" She stopped, biting her lip. "Sorry."

Mrs Knight looked over her shoulder, smiling. "She does. So, we still need a name."

Jett sat on the bed, winding an arm around Kendall's shoulders, smiling to himself when Kendall leaned against him. "Well, it's your baby. The choice is yours."

Katie handed the baby back to Kendall. He looked at her flushed face, her little button nose. She'd definitely got that from James. Her eyes were blue, like all newborns' were, and she looked up with such an innocent expression. Kendall felt like crying. Crying with happiness because he finally had his baby, crying with sadness that James wasn't here to see her. He looked at Jett, who grinned at him.

"Maybe name her after someone?" Carlos suggested. "Like, your grandma, or something?"

"Who, _my _mom?" Kendall giggled at his mother's appalled expression. "She never wanted anything to do with us. Anyway, her name is Winter. Though it suited her cold attitude, you couldn't give that name to a little cutie like this."

Carlos was laughing too. "Actually, I've never met your mom. I was thinking about Kendall's dad's mom, Em."

"Oh, yeah." Logan smiled. "She was so sweet. Remember that time she took us to the zoo for Katie's third birthday?"

"Em is a cute name," Jett added, wanting to take part in the conversation. Kendall just sat there, listening, thinking.

Mrs Knight gave Jett a small smile. She'd never really liked him much. But Kendall came first. "Well, her name was Emily, actually. Everyone just called her Em."

There was a brief silence. Then Katie said, half to herself, "Emily. That's pretty."

Kendall grinned at her, dimples showing. "I like it." He looked back down at his little daughter. "I love it, actually. I think it suits her."

"Emily Knight. I like the sound of it too," Logan said, smiling.

Emily Bridget Knight left the hospital the next evening when Mrs Knight came to take her and Kendall home. He'd been handed a number of pamphlets on childcare by the nurses, appreciating their concern but really just wanting to get home. He wondered briefly, if he should call James and let him know. He was Emily's father, after all. But Kendall knew he probably wouldn't pick up. It was only when nobody was looking that he pulled out his phone and typed a quick text.

_Her name is Emily._

He pressed send, letting out a long sigh. "Honey, is something wrong?" his mom asked from the driver's seat.

"No," Kendall replied, smiling down at Emily, who even in the car he still held in his arms. "Everything's perfect."

… … …

_Her name is Emily._

James stared at his phone, biting his lip. Emily. Emily Knight. So, it'd been a girl. His little girl. He'd missed his little daughter being born. A tear slid down his cheek. How could he be so stupid? He quickly typed a reply, deciding it seemed a good thing to do. _When was she born?_

About ten minutes, he got his text. 6_:32 yesterday afternoon. Everyone was there._

_Even Jett?_James probably sounded furiously jealous, because he _was_ furiously jealous.

His phone beeped. _Yes. _

James dropped his phone onto the table, folding his arms and resting his head on them. It was his own fault. He knew it. But maybe someday, he'd go back. Maybe he'd be able to meet his daughter. One day.

There was a knock on his door, and he got up to answer it. "Hey, James, man!" Al greeted, waving a bottle of vodka around. "We're goin' party at Trina's place. You coming?"

"Yeah, sure." James grabbed his keys, leaving the apartment. Someday, just not today. He could live like this for a little longer. What harm could it do?

**Well, there you go! Emily Knight! Not sure why I picked that name, I though of a little blode girl running around the place and Emily just came to mind. I like the name anyway, so SUE ME! Lol, sorry, ANYWAY, who still hates me and my Kett? Hehe, reviews!**


	9. Part 2: Chapter 1

**I consider this to be like a part 2, really. I was going to do a chapter after the baby is born, but I really couldn't find the inspiration. Even after sitting in front of the computer for an hour, and watching a load of family movies. UGH it was so annoying! Oh, well. Enjoy!**

"Emily? Sweetie, you have school. Get up!"

Kendall threw the curtains of the girly purple bedroom open, letting the morning California sun shine in through the window. The blonde girl lying in the bed groaned and pulled the comforter over her head. "Dad! Do I have to go to school?"

"Yep, the same way I have to go to work. Days in bed are for the weekend, honey. Come on. Breakfast."

Emily slowly got out of bed, stretching. Her curly blonde hair was tossed all over the place. She was small, and pale like Kendall, with large hazel eyes. She skipped off to the kitchen, suddenly much more alert. Kendall followed her, already showered and dressed in his uniform of black pants, a white shirt and black tie. He made and packed a lunch while Emily quickly ate a bowl of cereal. She ran off to get dressed and brush her teeth while Kendall put her lunchbox into her backpack and grabbed both their jackets.

On the way in the car, Emily chattered loudly from the backseat about some new doll her best friend Jasmine had bought. Kendall listened, adding his own comments in now and then, saying she could get it soon enough if she wanted, but she'd have to behave herself. Not that there was much to worry about in that department.

"Hey, Dad? Can I ask you something?" They had stopped in front of the school gates, where Kendall could see many elementary school students walking or running through the large double doors.

"Sure, sweetie."

"Who was my mom?"

Kendall froze. Why did she always ask that? "Um, Emily, I . . . I can't tell you that right now."

"Why not?" Emily asked indignantly.

"I don't think you're old enough yet . . ."

"Why? When will I be old enough, then?" Emily looked thoughtful for a second. "In a month?"

"Nope."

"How about when I'm eight?"

"Um, maybe. But probably not."

"_Nine_, then?"

"Alright, nine." Kendall sighed, unable to hide the fond smile on his face. "Now go to school. I'll see you later."

"Ok." Emily hopped out of the car, pulling her backpack onto her shoulder. Kendall rolled down the driver's window and leaned out, kissing her goodbye. "Good luck in math today, honey. You'll do great."

"Thanks, Dad," Emily said with a grin. "Bye!"

Kendall watched her walk through the front door, before starting the car again and driving away. It took him about ten minutes to get to Olive Garden, the restaurant with the idiotic name that he spent every day waiting tables in. It sucked, walking around all day, but the places was fancy so people gave good tips, and the wages were good too. He didn't mind it so much.

He walked through the front door, smiling in greeting at the woman sitting behind the front desk.

"Hi, Kendall," the Latina girl said brightly, reaching under the counter and handing him a black apron.

"Hi, Vicky," Kendall replied with a smile, tying the little apron around his waist. "How're things between you and Jeff?"

Vicky rolled her eyes. "Well, turns out he did sleep with that stripper. He said it didn't mean anything but . . ." She shrugged. "It's not such a big deal. Honestly, I wouldn't mind so much if we broke up. It's him that minds, so I've got him wrapped around my little finger right now."

Kendall couldn't help laughing. "Well, that's good, I suppose. You know, I should . . ."

Vicky rolled her eyes at him. "Nice try, sweetheart. We've got two tables taken right now, and they're being waited already. You're stuck with me and my suckish love life."

"You've got a suckish love life? What about me? I haven't slept with anyone in like a year. I haven't been on a date in seven months."

"Wow." Vicky raised her eyebrows. "That's a long time. And with your looks and all."

"Pfft. Whatever."

"Don't 'Pfft' me! You've had a baby and still look great. I'm so jealous of you, and you're not even a girl. It's ridiculous."

"You still look great too, Vic. Speaking of that, how's Zach doing?"

"Grounded for coming home late. But other than that, we're getting along fine!"

"Well, that's good."

"What about Emily?"

"She's fine." He bit his lip. "She asked about her mom again."

"Oh. What did you tell her?"

"That I'd tell her when she's nine."

"But you know you won't."

"I know that, but she doesn't."

"You can't keep lying to her."

"Sure I can."

"But do you want to?"

Kendall bit his lip, shaking his head. "I feel bad about it. But, I just can't tell her yet. I just . . ." Kendall shrugged and sighed.

Vicky looked sympathetic. "Poor thing. Don't worry. Maybe you'll find yourself a nice guy to date and it'll all work out, and she'll forget about her 'mother'."

Kendall smiled. "Well, maybe later. Right now, I have to work. Later, Vic."

He worked for five solid hours, the place getting busier by the minute. He stopped for a quick snack break in the middle, before going back to waiting the tables. At two thirty, Vicky walked up to him and rested a hand on his arm. "Hey, Kendall. Work's finishing early today; we've got a couple of workmen re-painting. So, go home now. You look tired."

"I'm always tired, Vic, but thanks." He took his apron off and handed it to her before heading to the door, grabbing his jacket and leaving the restaurant. School was almost over, so Kendall sent a quick text to his mom and Katie, telling them he'd pick Emily up himself. Kendall got out of the car and walked into the schoolyard. He spotted Dylan standing a few feet away and walked over to her. She was talking to another woman that he hadn't seen before. "Hey, Dylan!" he greeted, walking up to her.

"Kendall!" They hugged, and then she pointed out the woman next to her. "This is Alicia. Her son Peter just started here."

"Oh. That's nice."

"I was just telling her about that play Emily and Jasmine were in last month."

"Oh yeah, that was cool."

"Are you Emily's brother?" the woman asked sweetly.

Kendall had to stop himself from sighing. _You'd think she'd have caught on when Dylan was talking to her._ "No. I'm her father."

"What?" She looked astounded. "That's just . . . how old are you?"

_Jesus, it's none of your business!_ "I'm twenty three."

"Whoa." Suddenly she looked embarrassed. "Well, I should probably go find my son now. Nice meeting you, Kevin . . ."

"Kendall."

"Yes, Kendall. Ok. Well, uh, bye, Kendall, Dylan." She hurried away, looking so flustered.

"Some people are way too nosy for their own good," Dylan commented, brushing her red hair aside.

"Whatever. I'm used to it." He smiled at her. They'd become so close over the past two years. When your kids were best friends, you practically ended up best friends too. "How's Gary doing?"

"He kicked again yesterday," Dylan replied, beaming with pride as she rested a hand over her large stomach. "I swear, I don't know if I can stand waiting another three months; I'm way too excited."

Emily and Jasmine came running out of school towards their parents, backpacks on their shoulders. "Hi, Dad!" Emily shrieked, leaping forward and hugging his waist.

"Hi, Emmy. You ready to go?"

"Yeah, ok."

"Hey, Jas was asking if Emily would come stay the night on Saturday," Dylan said suddenly. "I've just remembered."

"Yeah, that'd be nice. Right, honey?"

Emily nodded enthusiastically. "I can't wait!"

"Ok, well, I've gotta get going, so I'll see you tomorrow, Dylan. Later, Jas."

Kendall and Emily walked back to the car and got in. As Kendall started the engine, the radio came on. Kendall bit his lip as he heard a familiar song playing. Why were they still playing their music after all this time? Sure, they'd been popular but they hadn't been all that special . . .

"_. . . Let me take a little moment to find the right words, so when I kick it to you it ain't something that you've heard . . ."_

"Is that your old band, Dad?" Emily asked, humming along to the melody of the song.

"Uh huh."

"I like this song."

"Me too, sweetie."

"_. . . All I really wanna be is your boyfriend, can't fight that, let me down, you know I'm coming right back, I don't care at all what you've done before . . ."_

_God Dammit._ Thankfully, Emily distracted him. "Dad, this isn't the way home, is it?" she asked with a frown, looking out the car window.

"We're gonna go see you grandma; I've got these photos to give her."

Emily squealed with excitement. "And Katie too?"

"If she's around, yeah."

Emily was almost bouncing with excitement. She adored Katie; she was her number one idol. Most days she would go over there after school while Kendall was working, and often her and Katie would go around doing the many crazy things that he and the guys had done. Only toned down a little; Kendall didn't want either of them getting injured.

When they got to the Palmwoods, Emily was out of the car like a shot, running through the front door. Kendall got out and followed her in. He walked into the Palmwoods lobby, smiling fondly at the familiar setting. "Hello, Kendall," Mr Bitters greeted, looking cheerful for once.

"Hey," Kendall grinned back, walking towards the elevator, where Emily was waiting. Once they were inside, he pushed the second floor button and they headed up to 2J. His mom always told him to use his old key to let himself in, so when they walked in, he saw Katie sitting on the couch, reading a large script.

"Hey, Baby Sister," he greeted, shutting the door after him.

Emily ran over to Katie, squealing, "Hi Aunt Katie!"

"Hiya, Em," she greeted cheerfully, giving the little girl a hug as she got to her feet. Kendall went over to her and she gave him a hug too. At seventeen, she was tall and slim, with the same long brown hair and large brown eyes. New Town High was still airing and now in the middle of its sixth season, and she was working on a movie now too, some follow up to _The Vampire Stories Chronicles Saga Trilogy._

"How was work?" Katie asked.

"Long. Yours?"

"Long."

Kendall looked around the apartment, setting the large paper envelope on the table. "Where's Mom? I got those photos she asked me to print out."

"She's gone out with Steve. You know, they're getting really close. Do you think they might actually get married?"

"Hmm, maybe. Let's hope so; he's a great guy and Mom's always saying how crazy she is about him. And it has been over a year."

"If Grandma got married, would she let me be a bridesmaid?" Emily piped up, a huge smile on her face.

Kendall chuckled at her enthusiasm. "Well, maybe." He turned back to Katie. "I should get going now, but tell Mom I dropped in?"

"Yeah, sure. See ya, Big Brother." They hugged again and Kendall and Emily left the apartment, walking down the hallway to the elevator. They were both silent until they actually got back to the car, and Emily hopped into the backseat, a big smile on her face.

"Why are you so happy?" Kendall asked, smiling at her in the rearview mirror.

"I dunno. I just am."

When they got home, past the doorman and up to the apartment, the first thing Emily did was drop her backpack on the floor and skip over to the couch, picking up the drawing pad she'd left there. "So, how was school, Emmy?"

"Um . . ." Emily suddenly looked uncomfortable.

Kendall bit his lip. "Uh, I'm gonna make dinner; you can tell me about school then, ok?"

Emily still looked a little nervous, but swallowed, smiled and said, "Ok. I'm gonna go play in my room."

She ran off and Kendall got to work. As he was turning the heat on, his phone started ringing and he answered it to hear a loud, chirpy voice on the other end.

_"Hey, Shorty!"_

"Carlos!" He frowned at nothing. "Do you have to call me that?"

_"Well, it's true, you are short!"_

It was true; Kendall had barely grown two inches, and now he and Logan were the same height, and Carlos practically towered over both of them. It irritated him so much. "You don't have to rub it in all the time, Carli. Anyway, did you call for a particular reason?"

_"Nah, I just wanna chat to you, Kitty! Logan took Grace to swimming practice and I'm sitting her watching ancient _Friends_ reruns!"_

"Aw, you poor thing. So, how are Logan and Grace, anyway?"

_"Fantastic! Actually, Logan was saying the other day that we should meet up again sometime when the girls are at school. You know, just to catch up."_

"That'd be nice." The water in the pot on the stove was bubbling, and Kendall quickly turned the heat off again. "Text me with more details, yeah? Right now, I've gotta feed Emmy, so I'll talk to you soon, ok?"

_"Ok. Bye, Shorty!"_

Kendall hung up with a roll of his eyes, taking to bowls out of the cabinet. "Dinner's ready!" he called in the direction of Emily's room.

She came skipping out, busying herself with grabbing forks and cups to put on the table, before grabbing the bottle of water from the refrigerator, putting that on the table too, and sitting down, fingers drumming on the table impatiently.

Kendall set the bowl of pasta down in front of her. "There you go."

"Thanks, Dad."

Kendall sat down across from her, practically diving on his own food. He hadn't eaten since like, noon. "So how was your math test, Emmy?"

Emily's face fell. "It was really hard. I don't think I did a good job. Sorry."

"It's alright. I can't do math either, honey."

Emily giggled, face lighting up. "So, you won't be mad if I get an F?"

"No way. Though if you do, maybe Logan could give you a hand. Math is supposed to be important so . . . you wouldn't mind, would you?"

"No, I like Logan. And Carlos, he's funny. Are they gonna bring Grace over again soon?"

"Well, I'll see them soon enough, I'll ask."

"Cool." Emily grinned at him, then went back to her food. Kendall did the same, smiling to himself. Sometimes, he really couldn't believe how lucky he was.

"So, anything else happen in school today?"

Emily looked at her half-finished meal, blushing. "A kid started asking me why I don't have a mom. Then he asked me why you aren't old like the other parents—"

"They're not that old."

"—then he started telling me that his mom thinks you're irresponsible because you're not old."

Kendall was blushing too, struggling to maintain his composure. "I'm sorry about that, honey. If anyone ever says things like that, you just ignore them, ok? Because they're not worth bothering about."

"I told him you were an awesome dad and if he didn't shut up I'd hit him."

Kendall tried not to laugh, but failed. "Ok, honey. Just don't ever actually hit anyone. I don't want you getting into fights."

"Ok, Dad."

After dinner, Kendall was almost finished washing up when Emily came up to him, holding a brightly coloured DVD box. "Can we watch _Up_?" she asked, smiling hopefully.

Kendall sighed. "Ok, ok. Put it on, and I'll finish this up and then make popcorn."

"Yay!"

Ten minutes later, Kendall and Emily were curled up on opposite ends of the couch, popcorn in a bowl on the coffee table. The opening scene began, and Kendall soon got sucked into the cute animation and Russell's crazy antics. He could practically quote him by now. The little Asian boy scout reminded him so much of how he and his friends had been when they were little. It was adorable, really. Emily was watching the screen in anticipation; this had been her favourite movie for about five years now.

But by the time the movie ended, Kendall was struggling to keep his eyes open, and Emily was yawning.

"Right." Kendall straightened up. "Bedtime!"

Emily sighed, getting up. "Fine. Goodnight, Dad." She kissed him on the cheek and started down the hallway, disappearing into the bathroom and shutting the door behind her. Kendall heard her brushing her teeth and going to the bathroom, before coming back out and going into her bedroom.

"'Night, Emmy!" Kendall called down the hall. He sighed, leaning back against the couch cushions. He was exhausted. Maybe he'd be better off going to bed too. It was ridiculous that he would be as sleepy as his seven-year-old daughter. Maybe that was what being on your feet all day did to you.

Then he heard a knock on the door, and groaned quietly to himself. He stood up and walked up to the front door, holding back a yawn as he pulled it open. Then he forgot his fatigue as his mouth dropped open and his eyes widened. There was a tall, broad-shouldered man standing there. He was tall; Kendall's head was barely level with his shoulder. He had olive skin, shaggy brown hair and tired hazel eyes. He was wearing a dark shirt and jacket, along with a faded pair of jeans. He was smiling awkwardly, shifting from one foot to the other. "Um, hi?" he said, making it sound like a question.

"_James?"_

**I'm fully aware there's a lot that hasn't been explained. Some will probably be explained next chapter, and more after that. I may but some flashbacks in too. I'm sorry about the major time skip, I hope you're not mad at me! REVIEWS!**


	10. Pt2 Chapter 2

**I had this written already, so here it is! I promised explanation, and I apologise.**

"James?"

The man nodded. "Hey, Kendall."

"What are you doing here?"

"Can I come in?"

"Um . . ." Kendall was so shocked he didn't say anything, and as James stepped into the apartment and shut the door after him, Kendall took a few steps back.

"I want to talk to you," James said, wringing his hands.

All Kendall could think of was how handsome James still looked. Then he remembered, and his anger rose. "What is there to say?" he demanded, arms folded across his chest. "You left me to raise our daughter all on my own. I told you I was pregnant and you ran off! Just tell me: what is there left to say? Tell me that and I might consider listening to you!"

"Kendall, I'm sorry! I just . . . I wasn't ready to be a father—"

"Let me guess; now you are? Now that she's seven years old and still doesn't even know you exist!" Kendall shouted. He'd had enough. "She thinks she has a mother! Do you think I'm gonna let you barge in here and ruin everything? We're both fine without you!" As Kendall said this, he knew it wasn't true. He needed James; he always had. He still loved him like crazy. That was why his heart was still broken.

"Please just let me explain—"

"Explain _what?_" Kendall's frown deepened. "Don't you understand? Do you have any idea what this was like for me?"

"Oh, it's _always_ about you! Always! Everyone has to do what Kendall wants!"

"Oh really? If that was how the world worked you would've stayed!"

James's face twisted with anger, and by now they were both screaming. "Jesus, and you wonder why I left you! Like I wanted to put up with this crap every day! You're obviously the same stubborn little _bitch_ you were when—"

"_Get out!_ Leave me alone!" Kendall shoved James towards the door. "I never wanna see you again!"

"Fine! See if I care!" James yelled, storming out the door.

"Fine!"

"Fine!"

"FINE!"

The door slammed shut. Kendall rested his back against it, trembling. Then he slowly straightened up, his breath coming out in choked sobs as he stumbled towards his room. He threw himself onto his bed, face buried in the pillow as he cried over James Diamond. Once he started, he couldn't seem to stop. Funny, how he hadn't cried much over the last few years. Even when he started dating Jett, while he was still heartbroken, he hadn't needed to cry anymore. Now it was different. James had actually come back to him. He'd always hoped it would happen. It wasn't supposed to happen like this. They weren't supposed to fight, he wasn't supposed to be unhappy. Still, maybe this was reality.

Suddenly Kendall felt a small hand rubbing soothing circles in his shoulder. "It's ok, Dad, it's ok . . ."

Kendall rolled onto his side to see Emily standing there in her pyjamas. "Emmy . . ." Kendall enveloped her in a hug, face buried in her hair as he tried to control the sobs that were making his body shake. Eventually he pulled away, but didn't get up from his spot curled up on the comforter.

"You should be in bed," he murmured, drying his eyes with the back of his hand.

"I was. But I was thirsty so I got up. Then I saw you and that man yelling at each other, and then you made him leave."

"Oh. Yeah."

"Dad, who was that man?" Emily asked, eyes wide.

"Um . . ." Kendall ran a hand through his hair, taking a deep breath. "That was your dad, Emmy."

"What?" She looked confused. "But you're my dad!"

"I know, sweetheart. It's complicated." Kendall sat up straight, beckoning Emily over. She sat on the bed, kneeling between his legs. "Ok, I'm gonna explain everything to you now. I would've waited, but . . ."

"Just tell me, Dad," Emily said impatiently.

"Ok. Uh . . . you don't have a mother, honey. Not really." Kendall paused. "You know that women have babies, right? You . . . sort of know how?"

Emily nodded solemnly. "Jasmine's mom has a big tummy, she's pregnant."

"Ok, good. Well, er . . ." _Ok, just tell her._ "Some men can have babies too, sweetheart. Very few, but it can happen. And, it happened to me."

Oddly, Emily didn't look puzzled; only surprised. "So, you're my mom, and that man is my dad?"

"Yeah, sort of."

Then she asked him the question he'd been dreading. "Why did he make you cry?"

Kendall paused and bit his lip before continuing. "He left me, Emmy. When I was pregnant with you. And . . . well, I raised you on my own, without him. But I missed him, y'know? And when he came here tonight, I was angry that he just came out of nowhere expecting me to forgive him."

Emily, again surprisingly, looked like she understood. "Why did you want to wait until I was older to tell me?"

The tears had already been building up. "I thought you wouldn't love me anymore," Kendall whispered, voice cracking on the last word. Tears slid down his cheeks, but like last time, he couldn't stop them. Emily hopped off the bed and grabbed a packet of tissues from the bedside locker, before taking one out and getting back up on the bed. Instead of handing Kendall the tissue like he expected, she dried his eyes and wiped the tears off his cheeks, and said, "I love you, Dad. You know that, right?" It was as if their roles were reversed; he was the child and she was the comforting parent.

"I know, baby; I'm just being silly," Kendall murmured, sniffling and giving a tiny smile.

"Dad?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I sleep in here tonight?" She was a master at the puppy eyes—something else she'd gotten from him—but she didn't really need them.

"Sure, honey."

Kendall changed while Emily went and got her teddy bear, then they both hopped into bed, lying facing each other.

"So." Emily smiled sweetly, the dimple in her right cheek showing. "Do I call you Mom from now on?"

Kendall chuckled softly. "You call me Mom and I'm getting rid of cable."

"Ok. Goodnight, Dad."

"'Night, Emmy."

As Kendall shut his eyes, he decided that he wouldn't trade this for anything in the world. Not even James.

**I'm sorry! Nex chapter will hold explanation for ALL, I just wanted to end it here. Please review!**


	11. Pt2 Chapter 3

**Hope you like this chapter. I think you will ;)**

The next morning was quiet and slightly awkward. Kendall put on a façade and acted bright and cheerful most of the day, like nothing was wrong. Like his heart wasn't breaking a second time. All he knew was that he was desperate to talk to somebody, to get it off his chest. He didn't like keeping it to himself. This was why when Vicky sent him out to take a break for an hour, he phoned Dylan and they met at their favourite coffee shop.

"Jas is really excited about Saturday," Dylan said brightly once they were sitting down with their food.

"Emily is too." Kendall gave a tiny smile. "I just hope they don't bother you too much."

"No big. And anyway, I'll just remind myself that it's your turn next time. That'll cheer me up." She frowned suddenly. "You seem a little down. Are you ok?"

Kendall couldn't help smiling as Dylan took a spoon and started scooping smoothie out of the cup and pouring it over her cake. Weird food cravings; nothing unfamiliar to him. "Well, I have news, and, um . . . I'm worried."

"Ok." Dylan looked concerned. "Tell me."

Kendall swallowed. "Well . . . James Diamond showed up last night."

Dylan's eyes widened to the size of saucers. "You're kidding!"

"I wish I was." Kendall ran a hand through his hair. "We just got into this big argument, then he left and I went and cried for a while . . . and now Emily knows everything."

Dylan looked sympathetic. "Do the others know?"

Kendall didn't have to ask who the 'others' were. "No. I wasn't sure how much I wanted to tell them."

Dylan nodded. "So, now what?"

"What do you mean?"

"What are you gonna do about James?"

Kendall shrugged. "Nothing. He's gone now. I'm over him."

Dylan raised her eyebrows, looking very doubtful.

"I am," he insisted, scowling. He gave his watch a quick check. "I should get going; I've gotta collect Emily from soccer practice." He stood up. "See you around, yeah?"

Dylan nodded, standing up to give him a hug before sitting back down. "I'll pick Emily up from yours tomorrow, ok? It's on my way."

"Alright. I'll see you then. Bye, Dylan."

* * *

><p>"Remember, she has to be in bed, lights out by nine," Kendall repeated, pulling his jacket on.<p>

"I know, honey," Mrs Knight reassured him, rolling her eyes as she kissed him goodbye. "Tell me, was I like this when you were young?"

Kendall chuckled. "You were probably worse." He bent down and gave Emily a hug, kissing he on the forehead. "Be good, ok?"

"Yes, Dad."

"Enjoy work!" his mom teased as she closed the apartment door after him.

Kendall sighed to himself as he took the elevator down to the underground parking lot and got into his car. Work. Ugh. Being a single parent and all, he worked two jobs. Two waiting jobs. While he worked five days a week in Olive Garden, he also Friday, Saturday and Sunday nights in a cocktail bar. It was a pretty typical one; lights, music, silver tables, uniforms that hugged everything that _should not_ be emphasised in a place full of horny drunk men.

To put it simply, it was probably his lest favourite place in the entire universe. But the wages were good, and the tips even better. He had to deal with feeling like some cheap prostitute every time he walked through those doors. Why did he have to need the money so much? Grr . . .

"Hey, Kendall," Max, the barman greeted when he walked in.

Kendall smiled at him. "Hi, Max." Max was alright; he wasn't an asshole like some of the people here.

Kendall took off his jacket and hung it up on a hook, his eyes wandering down almost automatically. Ugh, this _uniform_. These stupid pants, the stupid shirt . . . like he said, everything that shouldn't be shown off when he was surrounded by drunken men. He grabbed one of the round black trays off the bar, along with an order pad and a pen.

"Can you take a couple tables outside?" Max instructed as he poured out a shot of tequila for a woman sitting on one of the stools. "And in here too? We're a little crowded."

"Ok, fine."

Kendall got to work. It wasn't so bad indoors, with everybody else around. There was only the occasional snide comment or a wink in his direction. In a way, it could've been a lot worse. Sure, waiting tables meant being on your feet all night long, but it wasn't so bad. It was work anyway; everybody had to do it.

He walked out to the small patio-garden thing at the back of the bar, and over to a group of three who beckoned him over when they saw him. Across from them was a table with three guys who looked a few years older than Kendall was; maybe thirty or something. He ignored them and turned to the others, writing down what they wanted when he heard wolf-whistles behind him. He gave a long sigh, smiled at the customers he was with and glared over his shoulder at the others. Two had brown hair, and one—the tallest, and the one closest to him—had black hair. He was smirking in a way that made Kendall feel both annoyed and uncomfortable.

"That is one fine ass you got there, blondie," the prick said, leering at Kendall as he turned around and just shot him a withering look.

Kendall picked up the empty glasses from another table nearby and dumped them on a tray, turning to leave when he heard, "I'd like to bend you over my table, baby."

Kendall gritted his teeth and went back inside and in behind the bar. _I hate this job_, he thought furiously as he dumped the glasses on the counter. _I hate it so much._

"What's with the long face, blondie?" Max the barman asked, smiling at him.

Kendall rolled his eyes. "Like you don't know." He took his little notepad out of his back pocket and glanced at it. "Two apple martinis and some soda water."

"Right, one second." As Max busied himself with preparing the drinks he said, "How's Emily?"

"She's great. We're both great."

"Who does she stay with when you're here?"

"My mom goes over to babysit." Kendall sighed. "Max, do you know if this place was ever a strip club?"

Max laughed. "What makes you think that, blondie?"

Kendall laughed too, but waved his hands up and down gesturing to his uniform. "Have a guess, Maxie." He took the drinks and put them on his tray, lifting it up. "You know, I'm thinking of taking part in feminist movements."

Max rolled his eyes. "You know what the manager says. It attracts more customers." He smirked and said, "At least I'm safe back here."

Kendall smiled at him and turned to leave.

"You really do look great in that uniform," Max said after a moment's silence. "I know you hate it, but you really do."

Kendall looked over his shoulder at Max, and winked. "Thanks, Maxie."

Kendall walked back outside, keeping his eyes focused on the empty space in front of him and nowhere else. He walked over and handed the trio at the table their drinks, smiling when they thanked him. Some customers were sweet, and he enjoyed serving them. Even if he did have to dress like a slut. He picked up his tray again when he heard the three voices whistling again. He clenched his mouth shut and told himself not to react. He was about to leave when one of the guys—the asshole from earlier—got up, eyeing him with a nasty grin. He stepped a little closer. "Hey honey, how 'bout a lap dance?"

Kendall wasn't sure whether he should be annoyed or scared. He turned to leave, but the taller man grabbed him from behind by both arms, squeezing them tightly. "Hey, where are you going?"

His two companions laughed loudly in praise, the guy holding Kendall chuckling along with them as Kendall tried to break free. He wasn't annoyed anymore; he was just scared. Terrified. "Get your hands off of me!"

"Aw, why should I, baby? You like it, don't you?" The three were laughing at Kendall's obvious fear as the asshole (who was actually frightening) tugged him over to where the other two were standing.

"Stop it!" Kendall protested, squirming, but the jerk just laughed harder. "Get off me, you're hurting me!"

Then suddenly there was a grunt of pain and the grip on his arms was loosening. He broke free and spun around to see the guy sporting a bloody nose, looking furious. James was standing a few feet away, fist raised in preparation for another blow. Kendall watched him with wide eyes. Of all the people to rescue him, it had to be this guy? Seriously?

Max had rushed out through the doors to see what all the commotion was about, having been fetched by one of the stricken customers. "Hey, you three," he snarled at the jerk and his cronies. "Get the hell out of here before I call the cops."

"Are you freaking kidding me? That prick punched me!"

"Yeah, you report him, and you go down for attempted assault. Do the math."

They left within moments. "Kendall, are you alright?" Max asked, hand on Kendall's arm. "That's gonna leave bruises."

"I'm ok," Kendall managed to reply.

"You wanna head home? I won't dock you none. You can get some rest."

Kendall swallowed. "Ok. Thanks, Max."

"Tomorrow, too."

"What? But—"

"Yeah, I get it, you have to work. Like I said, I won't dock you none." Max shook his head at him, eyes flickering to James for a second before going back to Kendall. "There's no doubt he'll be back here."

Kendall nodded, then without giving his saviour a second glance, he hurried away. The drive home was spent chanting in his head, _I don't love James, I don't, I hate him, I __**hate **__him—_

"You're back early," his mom commented when he walked in.

"Yeah. Wasn't needed." Kendall just shrugged. "Thanks, Mom. I'll call you tomorrow?"

"Yeah, alright." She got ready to leave, but stopped when she got to the door. "Are you alright, honey? You just seem . . . unhappy."

_Nope, everything's peachy! Only problem is I was attacked at that stupid bar and guess who saved me! James Diamond! Yeah, I bet you remember him, you know, the one who ditched me when I was pregnant with his child? Yeah, that's the one. Oh, and he showed up Wednesday night too, did I not say?_ "I'm fine, Mom. Just tired."

The next day were spent wandering aimlessly around the apartment, cleaning and tidying every little corner just so he had something to keep his mind off . . . well, everything. Emily seemed to sense it and played quietly in her room or gave him a hand with the housework. He was almost thankful when Dylan came to pick her up for the night. He just wanted to be alone.

Yet, once he was, he didn't know what to do. He could watch TV, or read, or do more cleaning, or phone someone . . .

In the end, he just lay down on the couch with some book Logan had given him. But it was so boring; three chapters in and he hated the protagonist, he thought the storyline was stupid and he didn't understand anything. "I don't get it," he mumbled furiously, slamming the book shut and tossing it onto the coffee table, folding his arms crossly. Stupid book.

Then he heard a knock on the door. He hoped whoever was there heard him groaning as he got up and walked over. He pulled the door open, and his jaw dropped when he saw who was there. Oh God, not _again._

James walked in without invitation, shutting the door behind him. "Hey, Kendall. I wanna talk to you."

"How did you even find out where I live?" Kendall demanded furiously.

"Doesn't matter. I wanna talk about what happened last night."

"What about it? It doesn't matter." Kendall bit his lip. "I mean, um . . . thanks for saving me." He sighed. "So will you leave now?"

"Nope."

"Jesus, James—"

"Just let me try one thing."

"James—"

"_Please._" Without waiting for an answer, James shot forward so quickly he caught Kendall off guard and ended up pinning him against the door, rested his hands on the door either side of Kendall's waist and kissed him.

Fireworks. That was all Kendall could think of for a moment, but then his eyes widened when he realised what was happening. James was kissing him. His ex (who he hated, not loved) was kissing him! He had to stop this . . . but James's lips were so soft, and he'd missed them so much, and suddenly everything that had happened didn't matter anymore . . .

Him kissing back for half a second was all it took. James pulled back for a moment and they looked each other in the eyes longingly. Then James kissed him again, this time Kendall could feel the passion in it. He still didn't mind, even as James practically forced his mouth open and stuck his tongue inside, mapping out all those weak spots he seemed to remember from before.

But then James's lips were on his neck, sucking and nipping on it and his arms were suddenly holding Kendall very tightly. Somehow it was this that brought back Kendall's common sense, and his hands grabbed onto James's shoulders. "James, get off . . ."

James ignored him, holding him tighter as he licked at his neck. Kendall tried to push him away and found himself slammed against the door. "James, let go of me!" Kendall shouted, suddenly angry. "I don't want this; leave me alone!"

James's response was pulling Kendall closer so their bodies were pressed together and saying, "I think you do want this, Kendall. Just look at you."

Kendall's eyes strayed downward and he cursed his body for liking what James was doing to him. Then he saw the matching bulge in James's jeans and it all became too real for him. He got angrier. "Let go!" he yelled, struggling with James's hold on him.

"No," James just replied, before sealing their lips together again. Then suddenly Kendall had left the ground, still in James's arms as the brunette made his way across the floor of the apartment towards the hall. He kicked open the first door and peeked inside, before moving to the next one.

Kendall knew what was happening, but he didn't want it. Did he? "James, put me down!" he protested one last time. He was pushed against the doorframe of his bedroom, and when James looked at him he only saw love in his eyes. That was when he gave himself up to it, sighing and pulling James closer by the hair to kiss him hard on the mouth.

James groaned and stumbled backwards, tossing Kendall gently onto the bed before climbing on top of him. They kissed again and kicked off their shoes as James quickly lifted Kendall's shirt up and over his head, tossing it away before getting rid of his own. Before they knew it, all their clothes were strewn across the floor and they were just staring, taking each other in. James was still the same stupid Adonis he'd been when he left, with the huge biceps and the amazing abs. Kendall felt himself turning red under James's eager gaze. He felt so inferior. Meanwhile, James was almost hypnotised. Kendall possessed curves he definitely didn't have before the pregnancy, and it just turned him on.

James kissed Kendall again, grabbing onto his dick with one hand and making him gasp and moan. He quickly pulled back and stuck three fingers of his free hand into his mouth, getting them as wet as possible before moving them down and pushing one inside Kendall. Kendall moaned in pain at the sensation he hadn't felt for quite some time, but within moments he was pressing down against the finger and James was adding two more. It seemed as if they were gone only a second afterwards, because suddenly Kendall felt strangely empty and he saw James spitting on his hand before rubbing the saliva over his cock.

Then James was slamming into him, striking his prostate instantly. Kendall groaned. "Oh, James!"

James was already moving, pulling out and slamming back in with a grunt of pleasure. It was clear both of them had wanted this for a long time; both had ached to feel each other for so long. James was thrusting in and out of him as hard as he could, Kendall was screaming his name in encouragement, and they both seemed to have forgotten their yelling match less than four days ago. Suddenly James's teeth sank into Kendall's neck as he came harder than he ever had in his life, filling Kendall to the brim. He grabbed Kendall's dick again and quickly stroked him until he came too. Tired out, James pulled out and lay down next to Kendall, staring at the ceiling. It was probably a good idea to give Kendall some breathing space for a moment.

Kendall lay there, panting, when suddenly something in his mind switched itself back on and screamed, _You just had sex with James! What the fuck?_Kendall's eyes widened and suddenly he felt like he couldn't breathe. "Oh my God, I can't believe we just did that . . ."

"Kendall, you're shaking, are you alright?"

Kendall turned to look at James in horror. James was there, with him, in his bed. He'd just slept with James, that wasn't good, that was terrible, what had he been thinking? He felt so exposed. His bed hadn't been made that morning, and because of that the blanket was just crumpled up at the foot of it, making it very easy for Kendall to grab it and pull it up over the lower half of his body. "How could I be so _stupid?_"

"Kendall, I—"

"And you! Forcing yourself on me, I'm pretty sure this could be considered rape!"

"It's not rape if you like it." James bit his lip after he said it, knowing it was a stupid thing to say when he saw Kendall trembling even more.

"I think you'd better leave," Kendall whispered.

"Kendall . . ."

"Please, just go. _Now._"

"Kendall, I'm not leaving until you listen to what I have to say."

Kendall looked like he wanted to slap James. Instead he huffed, "_Fine._ But this better be good."

James gave him a small smile of gratitude and began to speak. "Kendall, I've made some huge mistakes. Believe me, I know that. After I left you, I just fell apart. On the inside, anyway. I was fooling myself into being happy when all I wanted was to come back. Then I started drinking, partying all night, getting hooked on pot, just making a total mess of myself."

"What made you stop?" Kendall couldn't help asking. This news shocked him into actually becoming interested in what James had to say.

James bit his lip, looking seriously downhearted. "I made some new friends who were making the same stupid mistakes as I was, and one of them, Trina . . . she died. She got drunk and she went driving and she crashed and _died._"

"I'm sorry." He meant it, too.

James was still talking. "It really scared me, because it could've been me who'd done it. So after that I did my best to change. And I managed to fix myself. I got a good job, started earning and saving money, and it took a while but it was all so I could get you back."

Kendall couldn't help scowling at him. "If that's all you wanted, why didn't you just come back sooner? It took you seven years, James. _Seven._"

"I know, I know. It wasn't just because I was ashamed, and kind of worried that you'd hate me." James sighed, biting his lip. "I saw all those interviews in magazines, with you and Jett looking so happy together, and it really hurt. Because I didn't think you needed me anymore. Or even wanted me."

Oh. That was what he thought. Kendall shut his eyes. "Those stories, I was only telling them what they wanted to hear," he whispered. "They were bullshit. I always needed you, and you weren't there . . ."

"Hey—no, Kendall, don't cry. Hey, Kenny." James reached out and brushed the tears off his cheeks. Kendall didn't bother moving away from him. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you cry."

"Well, it's nothing new anymore." Kendall mumbled, not really up to staying angry.

"Um . . ." James looked awkward, and quickly changed the subject. "So, now it's your turn."

"Huh?"

"Well, I've filled you in, so now it's your turn. What have I missed?"

Kendall really didn't think he deserved to know, but he caved. "Well, Carlos and Logan are together—"

"No way!" James looked delighted. "Since when?"

"Well, just after Emily was born, Carlos asked Logan out, and then they were together for about three years. But then there was a lot of drama and some stupid fights so they broke up. They kept dating other people for over a year, but then we got them to see sense and they got back together. Now they have an adopted daughter. She's six, and her name is Grace . . . and they just got engaged. But they're waiting a while to get married, they're saying there's a lot they want to sort out first."

There was a brief pause. "Anything else?"

"Um, well . . . I'm in touch with my dad again."

"Really?"

"Uh huh. A couple years ago he just showed up in LA, asking for everyone's forgiveness. At first none of us would speak to him, but he was persistent and eventually we kinda started acting like an almost-family again." Kendall couldn't help smiling. "I'm glad of it. We see each other a lot now. Him and Mom are friends now; she's seeing someone else."

James suddenly looked gloomy. "What about Jett?"

"Jett? Oh." Kendall sighed. "We broke up when Emily was two. We're still good friends, but I just felt like that's all I wanted."

"Good." James smiled grimly. "I didn't like him."

"He's still around, James." Kendall had to resist smiling at the immature behaviour he'd missed so much. "He hasn't vanished off the face of the earth."

"Not yet." James took a deep breath. "I've been holding back all this time, so I'm just gonna come out and say it. I want you back, Kendall. I need you back. I've never stopped loving you, and I'm never _gonna_ stop. Please, _please_ give me another chance. I promise I won't ever hurt you again."

Kendall thought about it for a minute. "Ok," he said slowly. "If I was to take you back—and I'm not saying I am—we're gonna have to lay down some rules for a while."

"Alright. What are they? Conditions are yours."

"Rule one; no doing what you did tonight."

"Meaning . . .?"

"If I'm mad at you, you are not to start trying to seduce me, got it? I will yell at you all I want if you deserve it."

"Ok, I can deal with that. Next?"

"Rule two; you're not staying here. Go back to wherever it is you came from. We're gonna be like a new couple, if you wanna do this whole 'fresh start' thing right."

James looked puzzled. "But, if I don't live here, then . . ."

"I know what you're gonna ask and that brings us to rule three. You're not gonna meet Emily until I say so."

"_What?_" James was objecting to this one. "She's my daughter! Don't I have a right to see her?"

"Don't start talking about your rights, James Diamond," Kendall snapped. He sighed and decided to be a little kinder. "Ok, picture this. You're a seven-year-old girl—"

James chuckled. "Great way to start the explanation."

"Shut up and let me finish. Anyway. So, you live with your single dad who refuses to tell you who your mother is. Then after a fight between your dad and a man who leaves your dad in a sobbing mess—"

"Now you're just trying to make me feel guilty."

"You _are_ guilty. _Anyway_. When you ask about it, you find out your dad was your sort-of-mom and the stranger is the dad who abandoned you. Then he comes back. You're happy, because you feel like you've finally got a full family. Then one day, he's gone again. He's abandoned you again. How do you feel?"

"Ok, you've made your point." James leaned forward and kissed Kendall on the forehead. "But I'm not leaving this time. You're stuck with me for good."

"Hmm. We'll see. Now, there's one more thing."

"Another rule?"

"Something like that." Kendall kissed James on the nose, staying close to him as he said quietly, "Promise you'll still be here tomorrow morning?"

James nodded, kissing Kendall's bottom lip lightly. "I promise."

Kendall gave a half smile, before lying down fully and rolling onto his side, away from James. He turned the bedside lamp off, shutting his eyes. Everything was still for a moment, then he heard the sounds of the sheets shifting and an arm wrapping around his waist, a warm body pressing up against his back. Despite himself, Kendall smiled and snuggled closer to him. Maybe he'd get some sleep tonight after all.

**Well, what you all wanted has happened? But will it last? Find out in the next episode (chapter) of Hanging on by a thread! Review and you may find out sooner! lol**


	12. Pt2 Chapter 4

**New chapter! Lol, sorry it took a while. I had writer's block, and even now I don't like this chapter much.**

When Kendall woke up in the morning, there was that distinctive pain in his backside that he hadn't felt for a while. He groaned quietly into the pillow, then his eyes widened as he remembered. James. Him and James. James had come back, they'd had sex, Kendall had taken him back straight away.

Kendall sat up, ignoring the sting as he looked around the room. It was empty. He looked again just to be sure, but he was definitely the only one in the room. The bedroom door hung open, the sheets were tangled up, his clothes scattered on the floor. His clothes only. James's were gone. So was he.

Kendall suddenly felt very cold, even though he was still wrapped up in the bed sheets. He couldn't believe it, it couldn't be possible . . .

Kendall hugged his knees and rested his head on them, and it wasn't long before he felt tears seep through his closed eyelids. He should've known. Why had he been stupid enough to fall for it? James clearly didn't care about him or Emily; he didn't want to be tied down. All he wanted was a good fuck and then he was gone again . . .

Kendall was crying so hard that there was a ringing in his ears, blocking everything out. This was probably why he didn't hear footsteps or the bedroom door being pushed open. "Kendall, are you ok?"

Kendall's head snapped up, his eyes widening. Because James was _there,_standing at the foot of the bed his in boxers and shirt, looking totally bewildered. Kendall squealed in shock. James was here, he didn't leave him? "James!" Naked as he was, Kendall leaped out of the bed and straight at the taller man, throwing his arms around his neck. "Oh my God, James!"

James immediately held Kendall back, arms draped around his waist. "Why were you crying, babe?"

Kendall just sniffled, face buried in James's neck as he kissed his Adam's apple softly.

James suddenly stiffened, and he tilted Kendall's chin up to look him in the eyes. "You thought I left you again, didn't you?" When Kendall didn't say anything, James went on. "Kendall, I told you I'm here to stay. I was using your shower, by the way. I didn't think you'd mind."

Kendall smiled up at James. Then for the first time he realised he still had no clothes on. His face turned red and he let go of James, sitting down on the bad and fumbling with the sheets again. "I wish you wouldn't do that," James said, sitting down and pulling the blanket from Kendall's hands. "Covering yourself up, I mean."

Kendall shrugged, avoiding his eager gaze. "Well, I feel kind of . . . I don't know, you're still Mr Washboard Abs and I'm just . . . meh."

James chuckled. "If by 'meh', you mean that you're beautiful and absolutely stunning, then sure." He kissed Kendall softly. "So, how about some breakfast?"

Kendall didn't bother to resist rolling his eyes. "What am I, your slave?"

"Of course not. You stay here, and I'll take care of everything."

Kendall smiled and watched as James skipped out of the room. But after sitting there for a moment or two, he realised there was no way he would ever let the brunette loose in his kitchen without supervision. So he got up, grabbed a clean pair of boxers and put them on along with a t-shirt, and walked out into the kitchen. James was rooting through the refrigerator and the cupboards, taking out things like eggs, flour and milk. "What are you doing?" Kendall asked, taking a seat on the couch, folding his legs up underneath him as he turned to face the back of the couch, watching James curiously.

"I'm making my world famous pancakes, duh!" James said with a roll of his eyes as he found a frying pan.

"Jamie, they're not even state famous."

"Alright, good point. But, they're still amazing."

"That they are."

"And you still love them."

"True."

James grinned at him as he got to work on the breakfast. "So, that bar. You work there?"

Kendall shut his eyes in a grimace. "Weekend nights. I hate it."

"So why don't you quit?"

"I need the money."

"Oh." James bit his lip awkwardly. "So, do you have two jobs?"

"Yeah. I work five days a week at Olive Garden. That's not bad; it's just tiring." Kendall paused, twiddling his thumbs. "So, what job do you have now?"

"Oh." James chuckled, some of that narcissism coming back. "I work with Man Fashion magazine, as a journalist. It's awesome."

Kendall laughed. "I would've expected you to be the modelling type."

"Well, I was offered that at first. But the thing is, I don't really wanna be in the spotlight much after . . . After everything I did. People disliked me after it."

"Oh." Kendall didn't really know what to say to that.

There was silence for a minute or two as James made the pancakes. Then Kendall said quietly, "Thanks for saving me, by the way."

James shrugged, though he was smiling. "Eh, whatever, blondie. Anything for you."

Kendall looked away so James wouldn't see him blushing. When the food was ready and he went to sit down, James grabbed him by the waist and pulled him onto his lap. As they ate, James left little kisses on his neck. They talked cheerfully, about each other, what they'd missed, and about the past. James pushed his empty plate aside and said, "Now what?"

Kendall shrugged and just pressed his lips against James's, hand running through his hair. He'd really missed that perfect hair. Then suddenly his phone rang. He tried to get up, only to be pulled back down by James. He started lauding when James tickled his sides, but eventually managed to hop up and get his phone.

Kendall grabbed his phone and held it up to his ear. "Hello?"

_"Kendall, hi! Listen, I have a doctor's appointment this morning that I totally forgot about. Do you mind if I drop Emily home now, and you could take Jas too, for a little while?"_

"Yeah, that's fine. See you soon."

Kendall hung up with a sigh. "What's up?" James asked.

"Emily's on her way home," Kendall said quickly. "So, that means you have to leave."

James smiled hopefully. "Can't you tell her I'm just a friend?"

"She already knows who you are," Kendall replied, leaving the plates in the sink.

"Well, can I at least see a picture of her before I go?" James asked desperately.

Kendall pointed over at the framed pictures on the coffee table before he resumed the washing up. Out of the corner of his eye, he watched James eagerly walk over and pick one of the photos up, examining it closely. A smile appeared on his face. "She's so cute." His smile widened. "That's my little girl," he said softly, and Kendall wasn't sure if he was talking to himself or not.

"She has you eyes," he said as he dried the plates off. He chuckled to himself. "And your eyebrows, thankfully."

"I love your eyebrows."

"Yes, but imagine them on a seven-year-old girl."

James laughed at that, putting the photo down and walking over to Kendall. He wrapped his arms around the blonde's waist and gave him a soft, slow kiss. Kendall kissed back eagerly, hands wrapping around James's neck. When James pulled back, there was some kind of wonder in his eyes. "God, I love you so much,' he murmured, kissing Kendall's hair as he held him close.

"I love you too," Kendall replied quietly, and he meant every word.

James grinned at him, but his face fell in disappointment when Kendall moved out of his arms. "You really need to get going, Jamie."

James nodded reluctantly. "Ok." He walked down the hallway towards Kendall's room, and a minute later came back out wearing his jeans, jacket and shoes. He gave Kendall a quick kiss goodbye, and then he was gone. Kendall sat down and thought to himself for a little while, about how good a decision he was making here. He wondered how it would affect everyone if they knew. This worried him, which was why he decided that for now, he'd keep it to himself.

When Dylan arrived with Emily and Jasmine, the two girls immediately ran off to play in Emily's room, so Kendall and Dylan sat at the table with cups of coffee and talked. "I haven't got to be at the doctor's for thirty minutes," Dylan was saying vaguely.

Kendall nodded just as vaguely, mind returning to James Diamond and the previous night's activities. His face heated up when he thought about it. Especially when he wondered how on earth James could call him beautiful and all of that when he was so stunning himself. It confused him.

"Kendall? Hey, Kendall! Wake up, Kendahlia!"

"Huh?" Kendall's head snapped up. "Yes?"

"What are you dreaming about, or are you just half asleep?"

"Oh." Kendall bit his lip, trying to hide a smile as he thought about his reason for zoning out. "Nothing."

"Hmm. I don't buy it. You've got that look."

"What look?"

"You've just got this glow about you." Then Dylan smiled. "I know what it is! It's the I'm-in-an-awesome-new-relationship look!" Her eyes narrowed mischievously. "Honestly, I we leave you alone for one night and you go out and meet someone new. So, who is he?"

Kendall bit his lip sheepishly. "Well, I didn't exactly meet him. That is, I sort of already know him and we're . . . doing it again?"

Dylan gasped. "Not Jett Stetson!"

"Um, no. But you're getting pretty close."

Dylan though for a moment. Then her eyes widened even further. "Kendall, you didn't."

Kendall's cheeks turned red. "I did," he replied quietly.

Dylan looked shocked. "Kendall Knight, what on earth are you thinking? James Diamond, of all people?"

"Um, well. I love him. And . . . he told me he loves me too."

"And if he's lying?"

"Then, it's my own mistake and I won't complain. I made the choice, so it's all on me." Kendall shrugged feebly. "That's why I haven't brought Emily into this. I don't want her to get hurt."

"And what about you, honey? You don't deserve another broken heart."

"I don't think anyone does. But, like I said, it's my own choice."

Dylan sighed, nodding. "Yeah, I suppose it is." Suddenly she grinned. "So, what did you two do, exactly?"

So that was how it went. Whenever Kendall was home alone, James would call over. Sometimes they would go out, other times they'd stay in the apartment. There were those Tuesday evenings that James looked forward to every week when Emily was gone to soccer practice and he had Kendall to himself for at least an hour. And often o weekend nights, he would go to Kendall's work place, just to be around him, to talk to him when he had a spare minute or two, or just to stare at him in that hot uniform. He was also there to ward off any drunken or just annoying men who came at him, and sometimes there were plenty of those.

Logan, Carlos and the others didn't know anything and Kendall planned to keep it that way, at least until he was sure James was really going to stick around. However, one day about ten weeks later, he called James and said, "Hey, are you busy? Can you come over?"

James's reply was, _"I can come. But isn't Emily at home?"  
><em>  
>Kendall swallowed. Ok, here goes nothing. "Yes, she is. I want you to meet her."<p>

At first, Kendall didn't hear anything on the other end. Then he heard a stutter, _"A-are you sure?"  
><em>  
>"I'm sure."<p>

Kendall didn't think James had ever sounded happier when he said, _"I'll be there in ten minutes!"_and hung up.

Kendall put the phone down, biting his lip. He just prayed that this would go well. If a meeting between the two most important people in his life went wrong, what would he do?

**Reviews are greatly appreciated!**


	13. Pt2 Chapter 5

**New chapter! Who's excited? XD**

Kendall took a deep breath and opened his mouth. "Emily! Will you come here a minute?"

Emily appeared a moment or two later. "What is it, Dad?"

"Um . . . listen, there's someone I want you to meet," Kendall replied, wringing his hands nervously. "They'll be here soon."

"Ok. Who is it?"

"Um . . . just wait until they arrive, ok?" Kendall didn't want to admit how nervous he was.

But James was worse. He was so nervous he was on the verge of crashing the car as he drove to Kendall's apartment. But he was excited too, so excited he could burst. He was finally gonna meet his daughter, his precious little girl. What was she like? Would she be shy, or confident? What did she like to do? He knew she played soccer, but that was pretty much it.

He pulled up into the apartment parking lot and leaped out of the car. He ran into the building and ran to the elevator. When that took more than five seconds he ran to the stairs, bounding up two at a time. He stopped in front of Kendall's apartment door and took a deep breath to compose himself. Then he knocked. Kendall opened the door and smiled in greeting. "Hi, Jamie. Come on in."

James walked in with shaky legs, looking around. And there she was. Standing next to Kendall. She was quite small, with masses of long blonde curls, pale skin and large hazel eyes. She was adorable, her mouth in a slight pout as she looked up at him.

"Emily, this is James. You remember him. Your dad." Kendall stopped, watching them both apprehensively. "Well, say hi."

"Hi," Emily said quietly, unsmiling as she stared up at him.

James smiled at her, praying he wouldn't just burst into tears. "Hi, Emily." He crouched down so his height was level with hers. "Um, it's really great to finally meet you."

Emily folded her arms. "You hurt Dad, you know. You made him cry."

James bit his lip. "I know, but I'm really sorry. And, I really love your dad. I love both of you."

Emily gave him a big smile, dimples in her cheeks. "Ok." then she jumped at him, giving him a hug. James hugged her back tightly, face buried in her hair as he felt tears building up in his eyes. He looked up for a moment to see Kendall standing there smiling at them, unshed tears in his own eyes. He got down on his knees next to them and joined in the hug, laughing at the mushiness of the whole thing.

From then on James was there often, in the afternoons and evenings. Sometimes he slept over, but not often. Emily was getting used to him, and he was getting to know more about her. One evening, James and Kendall were sitting on the couch holding hands, Emily in between them. They were watching cartoons on TV when Kendall's phone rang. He got up to answer it, standing by the counter. "Hello?"

_"Kendall, __hi! __It's __Bryson!"_

"Bryson?" Why was Dylan's husband calling him? Unless . . . "Is something wrong?"

_"Dylan's __having __the __baby, __right __now! __We're __on__the __way __to __the __hospital! __She __said __to __call __you__.__.__."  
><em>  
>"Yeah, I got it. I'll be there soon. See you later."<p>

He hung up with a sigh and reached for his jacket on the rack by the door.

"Something wrong, baby?" James asked worriedly.

"It's Dylan. She's gone into labour," Kendall replied quickly. "I've gotta go to the hospital, to watch Jas and just to be there." Suddenly he stopped, looking up at James pleadingly. "Can you watch Emily? I don't have time to call a babysitter."

James just laughed. "She's my daughter, genius, of course I can watch her."

Kendall rolled his eyes at him. "Well, make sure she's in bed with the lights out by nine," he said as he grabbed his jacket and pulled it on. "I'll be back in a few hours."

He walked towards the door, then turned back and hurried over to James, giving him a gentle kiss on the lips before turning away again. Within another few seconds the front door had shut and he was gone. James turned around to face Emily, who was watching him with a slightly disapproving look. Well, about as disapproving as a seven-year-old could look, that is. "So, what do you wanna do?" James asked her, trying not to sound too eager.

"Can I watch TV?" she asked.

"Um . . . Yeah, ok."

She skipped over to the couch and continued watching cartoons. James went and sat next to her. They just watched TV for a while, occasionally speaking to each other about random things. James wondered what Kendall was doing in the hospital for most of it. Bedtime came a little too soon for him. Damn parenting.

"You should probably get to bed," James said. He smiled. "Dad will murder me of you stay up to late; you've got school tomorrow."

"Alright." Emily got up and ran off obediently. She brushed her teeth and got ready for bed, hopping in when James went to check on her.

"Want me to . . . tuck you in or something?" James asked awkwardly. He was so new to this.

"Ok," Emily replied nonchalantly. James tucked the blanket in around her, trying to work out how to do it right. He gave her a quick kiss on the head, hoping she wouldn't object. She didn't.

He straightened up with a smile. "Goodnight, Emily," he said as he made his way towards the bedroom door.

"Goodnight, James," she whispered back as he turned off the light and pulled the door shut.

He went and sat on the couch, turning on the TV. He couldn't stop smiling, not even paying great attention to what was playing on the screen. Emily. His sweet little girl. And Kendall. Life couldn't get better . . .

"James? Jamie, wake up."

James wanted to slap whoever was shaking his shoulder, but then he realised who the voice belonged to. He half opened his eyes, groaning tiredly as he sat up in his place on the couch. Kendall was sitting next to him, perched gingerly on the edge since James had the whole couch taken over, his body stretched across it. The TV had been switched off, the apartment half dark. "It's 2am," Kendall said quietly. "You must have passed out."

"Two in the morning? Must've been asleep for ages," James mumbled back. Then he remembered. "Oh, Dylan had the baby, right?"

Kendall nodded, smiling. "Yep, baby Gary. She's delighted, they all are."

"That's nice." James smiled sleepily. "Well, I guess I should sleepwalk down to the parking lot, drive home."

"Don't do that." Kendall looked shy for a moment, his cheeks reddening. "Do you wanna sleep here instead?"

James grinned. "Yeah, ok. I'd like that."

Kendall smiled back at him and stood up, walking down the hallway towards his bedroom, James following closely behind. James just pulled his jeans off along with his shoes and socks. He went and used the bathroom, then sat on Kendall's bed until the blonde himself came out, wearing his t-shirt and a baggy pair of sweatpants. "Why are you wearing those?" James asked as Kendall crawled under the covers, slightly disappointed at the unrevealing fashion choice.

"They're comfortable," Kendall replied breezily, lying down on the pillow and turning the lamp off. James lay down next to him, shutting his eyes and sighing contentedly. He heard slight movement under the covers and a sigh coming from Kendall. He ignored it and focused on how tired he was, how it was 2am and he had to work in the morning.

But he could still hear shuffling under the comforter. "Kendall?" he whispered. "Something wrong?"

He heard a faint shiver, then, "I'm cold."

James chuckled quietly, rolling onto his side and scooting closer to him. "Why didn't you say so?"

He wrapped his arms around Kendall's waist, smiling when Kendall giggled and turned around to face him. Kendall gave him a kiss on the lips, hands moving to rest on his shoulders. "Kendall, you feel warm," James murmured, their noses barely touching.

Kendall smiled. "I know."

James rolled his eyes at the blonde's ridiculous (though successful) plan and ran a hand along Kendall's hip, and the blonde shivered slightly, though not from the cold. "I love you," James whispered in his ear.

"I love you too," Kendall replied, smiling sweetly at him.

They kissed again, James pulling Kendall closer so their bodies were pressed together. He rolled onto his back, Kendal ending up half lying on top of him. James kissed his face gently, smiling when Kendall kissed his neck in response. Kendall's hand rested on James's hip, on a patch of bare skin where his shirt had rode up. James found himself coming out of his dazed, tired state as he copied the movement, running his fingers along Kendall's bare back.

Kendall moved until he was straddling James's lap, before running his fingers through his hair and kissing him again. James kissed him back immediately, much more awake now. He wrapped his arms around Kendall's waist, running his hands down over Kendall's butt and cupping it through the sweatpants he was wearing. Kendall gave a little squeak at this, mouth opening as his tongue came out to meet James's.

They both wanted it, and they could both feel it when the kisses got more heated and the touches more arousing. Neither of them really cared that it was two in the morning anymore as James gently rolled them over so he was on top, their legs tangling in the sheets in the process. "We have to be quiet," Kendall whispered as they simultaneously pulled their shirts off and threw them onto the floor.

James nodded, struggling to pull his boxers completely off in the position he was in. But he managed it, then watched impatiently as Kendall slid his pants and boxers down his legs with slight difficulty, being trapped underneath a fully grown man and all. As the rest of their clothes were tossed aside, Kendall pulled James in for another passionate kiss, hands caressing the heated skin of his shoulders.

James reached over towards the nightstand, opened the drawer and dug through it until he found what he was looking for; the usual bottle of lube and box of condoms they always used. As he reached into the box he found nothing but empty air. Shit. It was empty. James glanced quickly at Kendall, who was just looking at the ceiling, eyes half closed with a slightly dazed look on his face. He hadn't noticed. James bit his lip, looking at the drawer, than at Kendall again, then the drawer again and the bottle of lube in his hand. Well, nothing bad could come from this. What was the worst that could happen?

"Jamie," Kendall murmured, hand reaching out to grab his wrist. He gave a sleepy laugh. "What's taking so long?"

"I'm—getting to it, babe," James replied quickly, squirting some of the liquid onto his fingers and bringing them down to Kendall's entrance. Getting him ready only took a minute or two, and then James was taking a deep breath, coating his dick with lube and getting ready to push in. Nothing could happen, he kept telling himself. He won't even know the difference. _This__could__work__for__me.  
><em>  
>Kendall moaned quietly when James thrust slowly into him. Their bodies were pressed together, their legs still tangled in the sheets as they began rolling their hips together. Kendall wound his arms around James's neck, kissing his jaw line as James ran his hands along the back of Kendall's thighs, lifting and folding his legs to rest on either side of his waist.<p>

Their movements became uneven as they got closer to the edge. James sensed his approaching climax and took hold of Kendall's erection, pumping him into coming at the same time. What he hoped to come from this seemed to have worked; Kendall looked as though he didn't even notice when James's seed filled him. James breathed a sigh of relief at this, pulling out to lie next to Kendall, wrapping him up in his arms again.

Kendall gave him a quick kiss and was asleep within seconds afterwards. James fell asleep with a slightly guilty conscience.

* * *

><p>"James is moving in with us," Kendall said bravely.<p>

"What?" Emily looked shocked. "Do I have to give him my room?"

"Huh? No, of course not." Kendall smiled. "But, he's going to be around a lot from now on, and I don't want you to be rude to him, ok? I know it'll take some getting used to."

Emily nodded, seeming to understand. "When's he coming?"

"He's over at his apartment right now, packing up all his stuff. He's going to rent it out to make some extra money. He'll be here soon enough."

James called them when he did arrive, and Kendall went down to the parking lot to help him with his stuff, having already cleared out some closet and drawer space for him. "Hey," he greeted with a smile, walking over to James's car. "How much do you have?"

"Six boxes and a bag," James replied, glancing inside the car.

Kendall rolled his eyes. "Naturally. C'mon, give me a box."

As James and Kendall dropped the fifth box off in the apartment. Kendall leaned against the kitchen table, yawning. He was feeling so drained now, even more so than usual. "Kendall, you look a bit pale," James said, Emily looking up from her place sitting at the table at his words.

"I'm fine," Kendall murmured, stifling a yawn.

"I think you're tired," James persisted, looking worried. "Maybe you should rest."

"James—"

"Just for a few minutes. Just sit on the couch, and I'll bring the rest of the stuff up."

"Fine," Kendall sighed, sitting on the couch, kicking his shoes off, lifting his feet and curling up his feet. "But I'm helping unpack."

"Whatever you say, blondie," James replied with a roll of his eyes. He went back down to the parking lot, picking up the last box and throwing the bag on top of it. Getting the car locked and making his way to the elevator was kind of difficult when he couldn't see much in front of him.

When he got up to the third floor and into the apartment, Emily immediately hissed, "Shhh!" at him when he walked in.

"What's wrong?" he asked quietly, shutting the door and resting the boxes on the floor.

"Dad's asleep," Emily said with a giggle, pointing at the couch.

James walked over and looked. Yes, Kendall had passed out on the couch. James smiled fondly. "I guess he's just exhausted. He works very hard for you, sweetie."

Emily nodded. She went back to her drawing. James picked up the box and bag and was making his way towards his and Kendall's room when he heard Emily speak again. "I like you, James. You're not so bad."

James grinned to himself. "Good. Love you, baby girl."

* * *

><p>Kendall threw up the contents of his stomach into the toilet, retching and gagging as he pushed his hand against the bathroom wall to steady himself. His head was spinning as he clutched his stomach in a grimace. For the last three days he'd felt horrible.<p>

He had an instinct, a bad feeling in his gut. Deep down, he'd been wondering about this ever since James came back. But he hadn't thought it would happen so soon, if at all. Carlos, Logan and the others didn't even know about him and James, and now this?

He needed help. Or at least an answer, and some advice.

Kendall picked up his phone and called Dylan. Waiting for her to pick up was agonising, and yet when he heard, _"Hello?"_on the other end, he wasn't sure what to say.

"Dylan, hi . . . um, are you busy?"

_"Nope, __just __sitting __at __home __reading __a __romance __novel. __Bryson __took __Gary __and __Jasmine __for __a __walk. __Why?"  
><em>  
>"I . . ." Kendall gulped. "I just need someone to, to talk to."<p>

_"Oh __honey, __I'll __be __right __over,"_she replied, sounding concerned.

"Ok. Um, could you do me a favour, and bring something over with you?"

_"Yeah, __what?"_

Kendall gulped. "I need a pregnancy test."

**BOM BOM BOM! Please review! XD**


	14. Pt2 Chapter 6

**This chapter is too short. :( In fact it's likely I'll re-write it sometime because I hate it so much. Sorry.**

Kendall was sitting on the couch, twiddling his thumbs nervously. Dylan was on her way over, but he didn't know how long he could wait.

"I'm taking Emily to the park," James said, watching Kendall with slightly concerned eyes. "Are you ok?"

"Huh? Oh yeah, I'm fine." Kendall faked a smile.

"You'll be ok by yourself?"

"I'm not a child, Jamie. And Dylan's coming over anyway."

"Oh. Alright." James sat down next to Kendall. "I want to ask you something."

"Ok," Kendall replied slowly. "What is it?"

"I want you to quit working at the bar."

"What?" Kendall's eyes widened. "Why?"

"Because I'll be earning more now with renting my old place, and the job at the magazine gets good wages. You don't need to work there anymore." James bit his lip. "Plus, it's dangerous. Being there at night, walking in the parking lot by yourself. I just don't like it."

Kendall chuckled despite himself. "You just don't like the perverts staring at my ass."

"That too. Come on, please?"

Kendall rolled his eyes. "Honestly, it won't take much to convince to leave that dump. I'll go in during the week, ok?"

"Ok," James replied with a grin. "Thank you. We'll be back soon enough."

He stood up. "Emily, I'm heading out the door!"

The little girl appeared immediately, dressed n et faded sneakers and her denim jacket. "I'm ready!"

Within a few minutes they were gone. And Kendall just sat there, breathing deeply to try and calm himself down. He probably wasn't even pregnant. He was overreacting . . . wasn't he? And even if he was pregnant, it wasn't such a big deal. It wasn't, it _wasn't_. . .

There was a knock on the door and Kendall almost fainted. Oh God. He got up to answer the door. Dylan was standing there, looking worried. "I got here as fast as I could. I have the test."

"Ok. Thank you." Kendall let her in and shut the door behind her.

Dylan dug around in her bag, pulling out the test and handing it over. "I've got a couple more, just in case." She paused. "So, you think you're pregnant?"

Kendall shrugged. "I . . . I don't know. Maybe."

"Well, the test will tell you." Dylan pointed down the hallway, a comforting smile on her face. "Hop on down to the bathroom and see. Call me when you're finished."

"Ok." Kendall glanced down the hallway, then at the test, then at Dylan. Then back at the test again, and back at Dylan. "Dylan? One question."

"Yeah?"

"Um . . ." Kendall blushed furiously as he stared at the little stick. "How the heck do I use this?"

"Oh!" Dylan laughed. "You piss in a cup, then dip it in."

Kendall wrinkled his nose in disgust. He would never understand women. Ever.

Fifteen minutes later, Kendall stared at the hateful little stick, a gigantic lump in his throat. That little red line. Positive. Kendall rested his head in his hand, glaring at the sink where the stupid test lay. This could ruin everything. _Everything._He didn't want to be alone again . . .

"Kendall? Are you done?" came the knock on the door.

Kendall walked over and opened it. "It's positive." He meant to say it with what little confidence he had left, but it came out a a weak whisper.

"Oh, sweetheart." Dylan gave him a hug. "I'd congratulate you, but I genuinely don't know if you're happy or not."

"Neither do I," Kendall said softly. "I mean, of course another kid would be nice, but there's work, and time . . . and then there's James."

"Well, you're going to have to tell him, you know. He's going to find out either way," Dylan replied sensibly.

"I know. But . . . I'm scared. I don't want to lose him." Kendall sniffed, feeling tears build up in his eyes. "I couldn't stand it if I did."

"I know, Kendall. But, the thing is you're going to have to do the right thing here. And you said before that asking him back was your own choice, and you would deal with the consequences."

Kendall sighed. "Why do you always have to be right?"

* * *

><p>"Logan, please, I'm really sorry—"<p>

"Yeah, you should be." Logan ran a hand through his hair with a groan. "I mean, when were you planning on telling that James was even back in the first place? And now you're back together! We were all best friends. And you didn't say a damn thing for two months!"

"I know, Logie," Kendall said sadly. "I just . . . I didn't want to say anything until I knew for sure he was going to stick around. I just didn't want you or Carlos to hurt again like before . . ."

"So now you're sure he'll stay?" Logan asked, eyebrows raised.

"Um, well . . . I thought he was, but now I'm not sure." Kendall swallowed. "Because I . . . I'm having another baby."

"Oh. Wow." Logan's angry expression faded away. "What are you gonna do?"

Kendall shrugged. "I don't know. I mean . . . I guess I probably have to tell him."

"Probably?" Logan raised his eyebrows again.

"Ok, I know I have to tell him. I just have to wait until the right moment," Kendall said with a begrudging sigh.

Logan grinned. "How about when you're like. In the middle of getting it on and you just scream it out in the middle of having sex?"

"Logan!" Kendall exclaimed, cheeks turning red.

"No, how about you text it to him when he's driving the car? Or when you're having dinner and he's taking a drink? Or—"

"Logan, please take this seriously."

Logan stopped laughing, putting on a serious face. "Fine. Kendall, I don't think they'll ever really be a right moment. You'll just have to suck it up and say it."

Kendall sighed. "I guess so." Kendall stood up. "I should probably get going; Emily's at soccer practice and I have to pick her up." He turned to Logan. "Do you mind explaining this to Carlos? I think he'll take it better from you."

"Ok. On one condition."

Kendall sighed. "Ok. What?"

"You have to tell James. Soon."

**Bleh. Well, at least you found out Kendall was preggo so it wasn't a total failure! Please review!**


	15. Pt2 Chapter 7

**New chapter! With a surprise :) Hope you like!**

Two months. Well, Logan had said to tell James soon. It wasn't a specific instruction. And hey, the right moment had never appeared (or maybe it did once or twice) so what was he supposed to do? Kendall stared into the mirror, his hands resting on his belly. It still looked pretty normal; it just looked as though he'd put on a little weight. No big deal. James hadn't noticed anything. Not yet anyway. Kendall sighed. He had his ten week ultrasound on Monday. He'd been hiding this for two stinking months; surely he could hide it a little longer?

But that was dishonest. He couldn't do that. And if James wanted to clear off again, well . . . he wasn't worth it. Or he was, he really was—no! Either James stayed, or he didn't. Kendall would face the consequences; he was the one who'd taken him back, he was the idiot who hadn't been careful enough and ended up pregnant again.

He had to deal with this like an adult. He wasn't a child anymore, he wasn't sixteen anymore. Ok, so how to put this into words . . .

_"James, you have once again impregnated me!"_

"Hey, guess what! We've got another little Knight-Diamond on the way!"

"I plan to sue the condom company due to the fact I am bearing another child."

Alright, none of that worked.

"Hey, I'm home!" came the hall from the living room. Kendall took a deep breath and turned around, leaving their room and walking down the hallway and into the living room.

"Hi. How was work?" Kendall asked, faking a carefree smile.

"Oh, it was fine. What about you? How was your day?"

"Good, it was good." Um . . ." He couldn't keep up the smile any longer. "James, I have something to tell you." Kendall swallowed.

"Did I do something wrong?" James asked, looking worried.

"No, not at all. I just . . . I mean. I . . ." Kendall ran a hand through his hair. "There's no easy way to say it, so I'm just gonna . . ." He took another deep breath, though it didn't seem to fill his lungs even a little. "I'm pregnant. Again."

James stared at him with wide eyes for a second or two. Then, "You're kidding."

Kendall shook his head, forcing himself to be strong. "No, I'm not."

To his amazement, James cheered loudly, his face lighting up in a huge grin. _"Yes!"_He grabbed Kendall around the waist, lifting him up and spinning him around, chanting, "Yes, yes, yes!" like a child on Christmas morning.

"James, _pregnant!_Watch the stomach!" Kendall managed to reply, his head spinning a little. He stumbled when he landed back on his feet, James holding him up. "Why are you so happy?" Kendall asked, hand on his forehead.

"Well, because," James bit his lip. "Um, don't take this the wrong way alright? I was sort of . . . remember when Dylan had her baby and we had sex at like, two in the morning?"

"Uh huh. What about it?" Kendall was puzzled.

"Yeah, we . . . unprotected. You didn't notice, so I just decided I wouldn't say anything. And . . . honestly I was kind of hoping this would happen."

"So, this is your fault? You did this on purpose?" Kendall folded his arms with an angry sigh. _"Why?"_

"Because . . . well, I still feel bad about Emily. I mean, I missed everything. When she was born, her first words, her first steps, when she started school . . . and I just, sort of wanted another chance, to redeem myself, in a way." James shrugged. "And, I really want to raise a child with you, properly, from the start."

Kendall rolled his eyes. "You're an idiot, James Diamond." Then he gave him a hug, kissing him gently. "I love you."

"I love you too," James grinned. He rested a hand on Kendall's stomach. "And I love our baby too." He paused. "How far along are you?"

"Ten weeks on Monday, I've got an ultrasound."

"How long have you known?" James asked, a frown appearing on his face.

Kendall shrugged. "Two months, I guess. Around that."

James's frown grew slightly. "Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"Oh." Kendall sighed again. "James, I'm sorry. I was scared, that you'd . . ." He couldn't bring himself to say it. He settled with, "That you wouldn't want another kid."

James knew what he'd been thinking, anyway. He gave a cheerful smile. "Well, no worries, blondie. I'm here to stay." He started jumping up and down excitedly. "I can't wait another seven months! Do you know the sex yet?"

"I haven't gone for any scans yet; I just phoned them and they gave me a recommended date. I don't know anything yet."

"I'm coming to the doctor with you," James replied firmly. "I wanna be there."

Kendall smiled. "Well, I have no objection to that." Then his smile fell. "Oh, God. What about Emily?"

"What about her?"

"She's gonna be home in an hour. How am I supposed to tell her?"

"It'll be ok, Kenny," James reassured him, wrapping him up in his arms again. "Everything's gonna be good."

Kendall wanted to believe him. But when Dylan showed up with Emily he was almost shaking. Screw that, he _was_shaking. "Relax," James murmured in his ear, giving his shoulder a comforting squeeze. "Emily," he said, raising his voice so she could hear. "Can we talk to you for a minute?"

"Ok!"

James lead Kendall over to the couch and they sat down, Emily walking over to sit next to them. "Emily," James started, because Kendall was totally silent. "We have some news."

"About what?" Emily asked, looking confused.

"Well, all of us, really. The thing is . . . um . . ." He bit his lip, "He's having another baby," James said slowly, a reassuring arm wrapped around Kendall's shoulders.

There was silence for a moment or two. Then Emily quietly said, ". . . what?"

This time it was Kendall who answered. "I'm having another baby," he said, watching her worriedly. "I'm pregnant."

Emily's eyes widened, and her little smile vanished as she leaped off the couch to stand in front of them. "Why? You can't have another baby!"

"But, Emily—"

"This isn't fair!" she cried, turning and running off down the hallway, and a second later the slam of her bedroom door could be heard.

"Oh my God . . ." Kendall murmured, hand clapping to his mouth as tears filled his eyes. "What'll I do?" He moved to stand up, but James pushed him back down.

"I'll talk to her," he said with a smile, getting up and leaving Kendall behind on the couch.

He walked down the hallway and opened the door to Emily's room. The little girl was lying on her bed, crying quietly. "Oh, sweetie. Are you ok?"

"No," she snapped, sitting up and wiping at her eyes. "I don't want Dad to have another baby!"

James sat down next to her, smiling sympathetically. "Why not, honey? I'm sure having a little brother or sister will be fun. Don't you think so?"

"He won't love me anymore once the new baby comes," she sniffled.

"Oh, Emily . . ." James bit his lip. "Sweetie, you're totally wrong there. He loves you so much." he sat down and pulled the little girl onto his lap, stroking her hair gently. "And, yes, maybe when the baby is born he or she will keep him a little busy, but he'll always have time for you."

"How do you know?"

"Well, for one thing, Kendall as exactly like his before Katie was born, and that all turned out fine. And secondly . . . ok, when I, when I came back, he didn't want anything to do with me at first, and it was only because of you."

"Me?" Emily looked puzzled. "Why?"

"Because he didn't want the whole thing to upset you. He cares about you so, so much, Emmy, enough to put you before anything he wants. You're always first to him." Oddly enough, James didn't feel my bitterness at this. None whatsoever. He stood up, "I think that's really all I can say to you, Emily."

He left the room, going back to the living room where Kendall was still sitting on the couch, head in his hands. James sat down next to him, wrapping his arm around him and pulling him close. Kendall dropped his hands and rested his head on James's shoulder, sighing mournfully. "What did you say to her?"

James shrugged slightly. "Just stuff."

"Helpful," Kendall snorted.

A few minutes later, they both heard the light patter of small feet in the hallway. Emily walked in, Kendall and James immediately sitting up straighter and slightly away from ach other when they saw her. She walked over and sat up on Kendall's lap, before bending her head down to rest her hear against his stomach, frowning intently.

"What are you doing, Emmy?" James asked, smiling in slight bemusement.

"I'm trying to see if I can hear the baby," she replied, solemnly, making Kendall's whole face light up in delight and relief.

"Um, I think it's a little early for that, honey," the blonde said softly, so she sat up,cresting her hand against his stomach instead.

"When the baby's born, can I teach them to play soccer?"

Kendall chuckled at that. "When they're old enough, sure."

"Is it a boy or a girl?"

"We don't know yet."

"Oh. Ok." Emily looked at both of them, then giggled as she said, "I hope the baby doesn't have Dad's nose."

James burst out lauding, clutching his sides at the indignant look on Kendall's face. "Even my seven-year-old daughter makes fun of my nose," Kendall muttered, hiding a smile. "Typical."

For the rest of the day, all Emily could talk about was the new baby. What they would look like, what they would be like.

On Monday, James could hardly sit still all day. He was taking his lunch break at the time of Kendall's doctor's appointment, and was fidgeting all the way to the apartment to pick up Kendall. And when they were driving there, he couldn't stop grinning, and occasionally giggling. "You are getting way too excited," Kendall told him with a smirk.

"I am not! This is a huge deal for us! Well, for me anyway."

When they got to the doctor's office, they only had to sit for ten minutes in the waiting room before being called in. "Hello, Mr Knight," the doctor greeted in a bubbly voice. "I'm Doctor Collins. How have you been feeling?"

"Alright," Kendall replied with a smile. "A little hormonal, but y'know, whatever."

"Of course, that's to be expected. Ok, let's get started. Take a seat right here."

Kendall sat down in the chair, leaning back and pulling his shirt up to his chest, exposing the slight bulge in his stomach. Dr Collins got the blue gel and began to spread it onto Kendall's skin. James reached out and took Kendall's hand in his as the doctor set up the machine, Kendall turning to smile at him.

"Ok . . . let's take a look at your baby, shall we?" Dr Collins got the stick at the end of the machine and held it so it was barely touching Kendall's belly. "Ok . . ."

James could see a dark blurry picture on the screen, trying to make out anything recognisable. "Can you see them?"

"Oh, wow." The doctor gave a slightly nervous smile.

"What is it?" James asked nervously, gripping Kendall's hand tighter.

The doctor turned to look at him. "There's two of them. You're having twins."

Kendall stared at him at shock, then at the screen with wide eyes. James was just as surprised as he was. He mentally shook himself and said, "Is it too early to tell the sex?"

The doctor nodded. "You'd have to wait at least another seven weeks, probably more." He straightened up, wiped the gel of Kendall's stomach and picked up his clipboard. "I'll be back in a minute or two."

As soon as he left, James turned to see tears forming in Kendall's eyes. "Kendall, are you ok?"

"Jamie, what are we going to do?" Kendall asked quietly. "We can't afford to have twins."

James didn't know what to say to that. In the end he settled with, "Well, I guess I could take some longer hours, or find a second job . . ."

"James, that's not fair on you." Kendall sniffed, wiping at his eyes. "W-we can't do this. M-maybe I . . . maybe I should have an abortion."

"What?" James's eyes widened in horror. "But you can't—"

James, it's not fair on Emily either. We can't go ahead and have two other kids if we can't afford to give them all what they need. I won't be able to work for a good while as it is . . ." Kendall shut his eyes as James leaned forward and brushed the tears off his face. "I'm sorry, Jamie . . ."

"No, it's ok," James replied quickly. "Just . . . wait a little while, ok? Just another week or two. Maybe something will work out."

"I doubt that." But Kendall nodded slowly. "Ok. One more week. But that's it. Not that anything is going to change . . ."

James bit his lip worriedly. We'll see about that, he thought determinedly. He would make this work. He had to.

* * *

><p>"So, you're asking for a raise?" Patrick Carlson folded his arms, leaning back in his chair. He stared hard over the desk at James Diamond, who was sitting in one of the wooden chairs in front of his desk, looking slightly nervous but determined. "Can I ask why?"<p>

James swallowed. "My family, we're just . . . having some financial issues."

"Since when do you have a family?"

"My . . . you remember. My daughter, Emily Bridget? It was all over every tabloid."

"Yes, of course. How could I forget?" Mr Carlson said with a touch of sarcasm. "Ok, James. I know you said before that you didn't want to do any modelling . . ." He paused, before continuing, "If you take part-time modelling job for the magazine along with your journalism, I'll double your salary."

"You'll . . ." James wasn't sure he'd heard right. "You'll double it?"

"I'll double it," Mr Carlson repeated, nodding.

James grinned. "Yes, absolutely, I'll do it! Thank you."

James came home to see Kendall sitting at the table with Emily, who was doing her homework. "Hey," he greeted, hanging his jacket up and walking over to them. "How's everybody?"

"Fine," came Emily's cheerful reply, Kendall giving him a small smile. Before saying quietly, "There's lasagne for dinner, I just put it in the oven."

"Ok, cool." James leaned down to give Kendall a gentle kiss. Then he pulled back and murmured in the blonde's ear, "I need to speak with you."

Kendall looked puzzled, but nodded and stood up, following James over to sit on the couch. James couldn't help giving Kendall a worried look-over. He was very pale, with dark shadows under his eyes. It was obvious he hadn't got much sleep lately, worrying about the twins and what they would do. It only made him happier to bring this good news.

"Kendall, I . . . I fixed it."

"What?" Kendall looked confused.

James couldn't help grinning. "I just got my salary doubled, that's what."

"You . . . huh?" Kendall's eyes widened. "How the heck did you do that?"

"Well, I took the modelling job," James replied simply.

"James, you . . . you said before you didn't want—"

"Look, I know, but that doesn't matter anymore. I like modelling, and maybe I might have an extra hour or two sometimes but all that matters to me is that we can keep the twins and raise them, together. It means more than anything to me."

Kendall just stared at him for another second. Then his face broke into a hue smile an he threw his arms around James's neck. "Jamie, you're the best! Really, you are."

"Oh, I know," James chuckled, kissing Kendall on the head. "We're gonna make this work."

Kendall smiled at him, pulling back a little to kiss James on the lips. "I love you." He stood up. "I need to check the food. I don't want it to burn."

James nodded, standing up too. He went and sat down next to Emily, who was writing little sentences in her blue notebook. "Hey, princess. Need any help?"

"No thanks."

James looked up to see Kendall smiling at him lovingly. He couldn't help grinning back. They were making this work.

**Next chapter will reveal the sex of the twins, plus Cargan will be back in please review!**


	16. Pt2 Chapter 8

**New chapter! Hope you like!**

When James got home from work one evening, Kendall was there with some news to tell him. "Carlos and Logan have an official date for their wedding," the blonde announced with a smile. "Two weeks from today; they've even organising it for a while, apparently. I was asked to be the best man."

"Ok, cool." James bit his lip worriedly. "Um . . ."

"I know what you're thinking, Jamie. And yes, they did invite you."

"Really?" James's face lit up on delight. "So, they're not mad at me anymore?"

"Well, I'm not sure. But, obviously they're up to speaking to you again."

James couldn't help cheering, jumping up and down. "I'm so excited! This is gonna be amazing!"

* * *

><p>"Ok, let's check on the twins, shall we?" Dr Collins said with a smile, spreading the gel out over Kendall's belly before taking the transducer and moving it over the skin, images beginning to appear on the screen. Kendall was now eighteen weeks along, now into food cravings and constant exhaustion. "Hmm, there they are. They're both doing great, see? Here's the head of one, and it's hands and feet, and here's the other one."<p>

Kendall and James smiled at the screen, James holding onto Kendall's hand tightly.

"Would you like to know the sex of the twins?" Dr Collins asked them with a smile.

They both nodded simultaneously. "Ok . . ."He turned back to the screen. "Sometimes with twins it can be hard to tell, but . . . I think I see two little girls here. Congratulations."

Kendall turned to smile at James, who grinned back. "Awesome."

"Ok, well that's all for today," Dr Collins said, turning the machine off and beginning to wipe the gel off Kendall's skin. "So, how've you two been?"

"Good," James replied, watching as Kendall pulled his shirt back down over his stomach. "We're going to a wedding tomorrow. I was thinking, is there anything Kendall shouldn't do?"

"Well, not too much dancing, obviously. Only slow ones. And don't stay on your feet too long, if you're feeling tired you need to sit down. That's really all there is. And no alcohol or raw food, though you know that already."

Kendall nodded, getting up out of the chair with James's assistance. "God, I'm getting so big."

"And you're going to get bigger," Dr Collins said with a smile. "So, have you felt a baby kicking yet?"

Kendall shook his head, biting his lip nervously. "Is that normal?"

"Oh, yes. It'll happen soon enough, what matters is that the twins are growing healthy and happy."

The next day, it was about two in the afternoon and the three were getting ready for the wedding.

"This shirt doesn't fit me anymore!" Kendall groaned. "I thought it would. Why do I have to be so fat?"

"You're not fat," James replied firmly, opening the closet and digging around inside it. "Here, you can take one of mine. This one is a little big on me too, so it should be comfortable."

When they were ready, they walked back out into the living room where Emily was waiting, having already helped her into her pretty sky blue dress and brushed out her curly hair. "Come on, we're leaving!" It didn't take them long to drive to the hotel where the ceremony was taking place.

Since Logan had been the one who'd plucked up the courage to ask Carlos, he had persisted that the Latino would e the one walking down the aisle. This was why it was Logan James walked up to see at the top of the altar before the ceremony began.

"Our ceremony is going to be pretty short," Logan said. "It's not just because we both agreed Kendall being the best man would have him on his feet too much. You know how fidgety we'd both get of we were listening to the preacher rambling on for an extra twenty or thirty minutes."

"I get that," James replied with a smile. "Well, um, we're gonna go back to our seats now."

James and Emily went and sat down in their seats close to the front. James caught Kendall's eye and smiled at him. The blonde smiled back sweetly, before he looked away as the music began to start. Carlos appeared around the corner and came walking down the aisle as everyone got to their feet, arm linked with his mother's, who had insisted on giving him away whether he liked it or not.

He arrived up next to Logan, turning to face the preacher, the two reaching out to join hands.

"Let us begin," the preacher began with a warm smile, Carlos and Logan turning to grin lovingly at each other.

All throughout the ceremony, James and Kendall kept sneaking little glances at each other, giving subtle smiles in each other's direction.

"I now pronounce you married," the preacher said with a smile. "You may—"

Logan threw himself at Carlos, arms around his neck as he kissed him hard on the mouth.

"—kiss," the preacher finished with a tired smile.

Everyone sitting and watching the ceremony stood up and cheered and Carlos and Logan made their way back up the aisle. But once they had passed, James took Emily's hand and hurried up to where Kendall was, immediately holding his arm for support. "You ok? You're not tired or anything?"

"I might need to sit down for a second," Kendall replied a little breathlessly, hand resting on his stomach as he sat down in one of the front row seats.

James sat down next to him, Emily hopping up on Kendall's other side. "It's a really nice place for a wedding," James said dreamily, looking around the ballroom. "You know, I'd love to get married here, someday."

Kendall gave a little gasp, turning to gape at James with wide eyes. "Jamie?"

James shrugged, smiling down at him. "It's just an idea. Maybe someday, when we've sort of got everything settled down."

Kendall grinned, leaning up to kiss James on the cheek. "I'd like that." He put a hand on James's shoulder, slowly getting to his feet. "Come on, they'll be wondering where we are."

The three got up and walked out of the ballroom, following the other wedding guests to where the reception was taking place. Once inside, the hurried over to where the crowd congratulating the newly wed couple was standing. They managed to get to the front eventually.

"Hi, guys!" Carlos greeted cheerfully, hugging all of them. "Glad you could make it! You all look fantastic!"

"I'm fat," Kendall replied with a laugh. "But thanks, Carli."

They stood there and chatted for a while as Emily ran off to play with Grace and some of the other kids. The evening dragged on, lively music played as various couples and groups of friends spun around on the the dance floor. Kendall sat in a chair, watching them but unable to join in. He sighed mournfully to himself, hand on his belly. "You two better be worth it," Kendall mumbled at his stomach, smiling to himself. "Preventing me from dancing at my best friends' wedding . . ."

Soon enough a slow song came on and almost everyone was still dancing. James walked over to Kendall, giving a little mock bow and holding out his hand. "May I have this dance?"

Kendall chuckled fondly at him, but took his hand anyway, letting James lead him out onto the dance floor.

James took Kendall in his arms, swaying him gently back and forth across the dance floor, keeping the pace slow and steady. "When the twins are born, maybe we can buy a nice house somewhere," James said. "There'd be more space for us."

"Mmm, maybe. If we can afford one." Kendall rested his head against James's shoulder, sighing happily. "Though it'd be handy. The girls could share a room when they're younger, but they'll probably decide they wanna be individuals as they grow up. Twins can like that, I think."

"I guess so." James looked down at Kendall when the blonde gave a not-so-subtle yawn. "Are you tired? Do you wanna sit down?"

"No, I'm ok," Kendall replied, shutting his eyes for a few seconds. "I can stay like this a little longer. I'm enjoying it too much."

However, only fifteen minutes later of gently swaying and stepping back and forth, Kendall had to sit down to catch his breath. We James immediately stood by his side, Kendall waved him off with, "Go have fun, I don't need a nurse."

"Are you sure you don't want me to stay?" James persisted.

"Positive. This is a party, babe."

"You're not partying."

"I'm pregnant, you're not. Go on." Kendall waved a hand off towards the rest of the guests. "Go mingle, it's good for you."

James chuckled. "Ok."

So he mingled. He saw so many people from the Palmwoods that he hadn't spoken to in over seven years. Some were cold to him, others just ran at him with a huge hug as if nothing had changed. The Jennifers were surprisingly friendly, but Guitar Dude was surprisingly cold towards him. However, some people were just how he expected them to be.

"It's really great to see you again," Camille was saying with a grin.

"You too, Cam. I missed talking to you." James stopped when he felt a hand tugging his jacket. He looked down to see Emily staring up at him. "What is it, sweetie?"

"Dad's falling asleep," she replied with a smile, pointing over to where Kendall was sitting. James had to smile fondly at the sight, before turning back to the little girl," Try and get him up, ok?"

"Ok," she mumbled back, yawning as she made her way back to where her dad was.

James turned back to Camille, "I should get going. Nice seeing you." They hugged, and then James walked over to where Carlos and Logan were dancing together. "Sorry to interrupt," he greeted, tapping Logan on the shoulder.

"Hey, James," the brunette smiled. What's up?"

"Kendall is tired," James explained. "Emmy too. I'm gonna take them home."

"Ok," Carlos said with a grin, then he and Logan both darted forward and hugged the brunette, surprising him. "Goodnight. Glad you could come."

James grinned. "Yeah. Me too. Congrats, again." He turned and went to find Kendall, who was sitting in a chair leaning his head on his hand, eyes shut. Emily was standing next to him. "Come on sweetie, we're gonna head home."

"Ok, Dad."

James's heart skipped a beat. Did she just . . .? "Did you call me Dad?"

Emily nodded, obviously unsure of there this was going. James bent down and gave her a warm hug, furiously telling himself he wouldn't cry over this. "I love you, honey."

"Love you too," the little girl said, a smile in her voice.

James grinned to himself as he stood up, moving his hand to Kendall's shoulder and shaking him gently. "Babe, come on. We're going home."

"Hmm?" Kendall's eyes opened as he yawned. "Did I fall asleep?"

"Nah, I think you were just dozing. Come on." James helped Kendall up and led him towards the door, getting their coats from the pile on the way. "You need to rest for a while."

The drive home was quiet; Kendall and Emily were both half asleep, Kendall's head leaning back against the headrest, a hand resting on his bulging stomach. When they got home, James had to hold Kendall up during the walk to the elevator and later down the third floor hallway.

James left the exhausted Kendall sitting on the couch and saw Emily to bed, helping her hang up her dress, took down her hair and tucked her in. "You want me to read you something tomorrow night?" he offered with a smile. "I think you need to sleep now."

"Ok," Emily muttered sleepily, kissing him goodnight before lying down and shutting her eyes, snuggling into the pillow. "Goodnight, Dad."

"Goodnight, Emmy," James replied, standing up and leaving the room, shutting the door behind him.

He walked over to Kendall, who was slumped on the couch, eyes opening a little when he heard James walking in. James went over to him, easily bending down and picking the blonde up bridal style and began carrying him into their room, the blonde protesting weakly. "I'm too heavy for you," Kendall mumbled sleepily as James pushed the door of their bedroom open.

"I hardly notice the extra weight," James replied honestly, carefully setting Kendall down on the bed.

Suddenly Kendall gasped, clutching his stomach with a look of discomfort on his face. Then his face broke into a huge smile. "Oh my God . . ."

"What, what's wrong?" James asked anxiously.

"One of the twins just kicked," Kendall said softly, smiling up at him. "Dunno which one, but she's strong."

James's face broke into a surprised and delighted grin. "Can I . . .?"

"Of course," Kendall replied with a roll of his eyes.

James eagerly sat on the bed, leaning down and resting both his hands on Kendall's belly. He waited. And waited. His smile fell in disappointment. "I can't feel it," he whispered sadly. "They're not kicking for me."

"Don't freak, Jamie. Try talking to them."

"Um, ok." James put his face down closer to Kendall's belly. "Um, hi babies," he said softly. "It's your dad, James. Um, I can't wait until you're born. You're gonna be two beautiful girls, I know it—" James cut off with a gasp as he felt a soft tapping against his hands, then a harder, firmer tap. Kendall was giggling breathlessly at the feeling. James looked up at him with tears in his eyes. "Those are our babies."

Kendall nodded, smiling as James moved up and kissed him softly. "I love you."

"I love you too." James looked back down at Kendall's stomach, stroking it gently. "And I love you two, too," he added with a grin.

* * *

><p>" . . . James, I'm not so sure about this name you picked."<p>

"Which one?"

"Jaime."

"What's wrong with it?"

Kendall looked up from the list to stare at James in disbelief. "We are not naming either of them Jaime. It's practically calling them James Jr, for crying out loud!"

"Why do you think I chose it?" James asked, but he sighed and crossed it off his name list. They'd been brainstorming for almost half an hour, and he was getting a little fed up. Even though he, like Kendall, wanted good names for both of the twins. "Let me see yours." He took the piece of paper and scanned through it. "Hmm, I like this one; Nicole. It's cute." He read a little further. "But . . . I'm not sure about Isabel. I'm not feeling it."

"Cross it out, then. There's no point in a name one of us hates."

In the end they combined both their lists together after a lot more crossing off. What they now had listed were Nicole, Suzanne and Hannah chosen by Kendall and Catherine, Rachel and Sarah chosen by James. They decided if they came up with any other names they'd add them on, and eventually pick two when the twins were born.

* * *

><p>"James, pick up your socks off the floor, please."<p>

"Yes, Mom."

"_James_—"

"Ok, sorry! Easy on the hormones!"

Kendall rolled his eyes towards the ceiling, before continuing to dry the dishes with a cloth.

"Why do I have to clean up, anyway?" James complained as he picked up the socks strewn on the floor by the couch, choosing not to mention it when he also fond a pair of his boxers there.

"Because I'm not a housewife, and I don't want anyone thinking we live in a complete mess with no regard for our surroundings."

"I never said you were a—wait." James's eyes narrowed. "There's someone coming over, isn't there? Who is it?"

"An old friend," Kendall replied breezily, though James didn't miss the slightly embarrassed look that appeared on his face.

"When?"

"Um . . ." Kendall glanced at his watch. "Well, they're usually on time so . . . five minutes?"

"Kendall, why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"Well, because I thought you'd start making excuses to not be here, and I just want to settle things even though it's been a really long time . . ."

"Kendall, who is it?"

Kendall just clamped his lips shut and wouldn't say. Only a few minutes later, there was a knock on the door. He went over to get it, but before he opened it he turned to give James a warning look and a, "Be civil." Then he opened the door.

James's jaw dropped. Fuck no. It was Jett Stetson. Standing there, with that trademark cocky grin on his face, blue eyes glinting. "Hey, Kendall."

"Hi." They gave each other a quick hug, which pissed James off even more.

"Who's here . . .?" James turned to see Emily appear in the living room. Her face lit up in a huge smile. "Jett!" She ran forward and leaped up, giving him a huge hug, which he immediately returned.

"Hey, princess. How are you doing?"

"Good. I haven't seen you in forever!"

_That's my daughter, you asshole_, James wanted to shout. _Stop hugging her._

Jett let go of Emily, straightening up and looking at him for the first time. His smile was slightly strained. "Hello, James."

"Hi, Jett." James forced a smile on his face. "How've you been?"

"Oh, good. And you?"

"Yeah, good."

A slightly awkward silence.

"Go sit down," Kendall said, pushing Jett over towards the couch by his shoulder. Emily eagerly followed him and they both sat down.

"Want me to make some coffee?" Kendall offered with a smile. "Or tea?"

"No, you shouldn't strain yourself—" Jett began, but James cut in.

"I'll make coffee, babe. Sit your ass down."

Kendall laughed at his abruptness, sitting down on the couch next to Jett. "Ok. Thank you."

James brought the hot drinks in a few minutes later, only to see Jett and Kendall sitting together, Kendall laughing at some joke the actor had made. He gritted his teeth, handing them their drinks and sitting down, immediately forcing himself onto the conversation.

They all sat together, chatting about old times, well it was mostly Kendall and Jett doing that, with James occasionally asking a question or adding a comment in. He wanted to try and be friends with Jett, but he couldn't help feeling that urge to punch something (or a certain someone) whenever he saw that cocky smile. It was six in the evening when the visit (finally) came to an end.

"I should get going," Jett said apologetically. "It was nice seeing you guys again.

"I'm gonna see him to the door," James said to Kendall. The blonde raised his eyebrows sceptically, which made James quickly add, "I'll be civil, I swear."

Kendall sighed and nodded, letting him go and walk Jett to the door of the apartment. The actor pulled his jacket on and opened the door, lingering in the doorway for a minute. "Bye, James."

However, James didn't say anything back. Instead he stepped out into the hallway with him, resting his back against the wall. "I'm just wondering."

"Wondering about what?" Jett asked slowly

"You and Kendall," James replied bluntly. "Just, about everything."

Jett rolled his eyes, smiling tiredly. "I know I would be the same." He paused, biting his lip. "Well, you know when we got together. Um, and we went out for a couple of years, I'm sure you know that too. He broke up with me, he said he was more comfortable with me as a friend, and I agreed that it was the right thing to do. I knew it was because he still loved you, really. Honestly, there are times when I think about him, and wonder what it'd be like of we'd stayed together. But he's a good friend to have, and I'm happy with that now."

James thought for a minute, then asked the question he slightly dreaded. "Did you ever have sex with him?"

Jett nodded. "Obviously. I doubt you expected a different answer."

"When he was pregnant, did you?"

"Yes. A few times. He just had this super horny moment and that's how it started . . ."

"No more details necessary!" James said quickly. He sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Um, well I guess I don't hate you anymore. Just don't try and steal him from me, or I might have to ensure you suffer a slow and painful death."

"I can live with that," Jett replied with a chuckle. "But, on one condition."

"What is it?"

"You have him now, so you'd better be good to him," Jett warned. "He deserves it, and he really doesn't need you breaking his heart again."

"That'll never happen," James promised. "Never. I love him, Jett."

Jett sighed, giving a sad smile. "I know."

**I have news! My story Lost & Found has been nominated on the BTR slash awards! I'm like over the moon right now. I looked at the other nominations and i was like "Ok, yeah that's the end of that . . ." but if any of you really like that story and wanna vote for me it would mean a lot! Thank you!**

**Oh and something else! I'm gonna open a poll for the twins' names, so if anyone has a name they wanna suggest (try to suggest only one, since i have a few already) and i'll add them to the voting list! Pleease give names and then vote on the poll!**

**Please review! XD**


	17. Pt2 Chapter 9

**The chapter with the birth of the little babies! Sorry it took so long and that it's kind of short (and bad), I hope you enjoy it anyway!**

Kendall was starting to get contractions during the day, in preparation for the birth of the twins. It hurt him a little sometimes, and a lot other times. And almost every time it happened and Kendall had a noticeable reaction to it, James would freak out and immediately assume the worst. "James, I'm fine," Kendall would practically yell every time. "If the baby was coming, I would know."

"But—"

"James, shut up. My head hurts."

This was what happened almost every day. Kendall was frequently moaning about the effects of the pregnancy on him. James wondered if the former residents of 2J had been forced to put up with this in such extreme measures. But he doubted it. Kendall wasn't one to complain unless it really sucked. It must have been because he was carrying two babies instead of one this time. He definitely looked much bigger than he had in the pictures James had seen of him.

His back hurt, his feet hurt, his head hurt, he was fat, he was way too hungry, he was always tired, his hormones were annoying him, there was nearly always something he complained about. Although the worst had to be the mood swings, when Kendall would scream at him and start fights, then he would cry and sob and wail until James had assured him a good few times that he was forgiven. It was awful to deal with, for both of them and for Emily too.

"This is what having a baby does," James explained to her. "But once they're born he'll be back to the way he was. He's just tired right now."

Understatement of the century. Since Kendall didn't go to work anymore, he spent a lot of time sleeping. James would get Emily ready for school and let Kendall sleep in. Kendall normally wouldn't get out of bed or even wake up until about two hours before he had to pick Emily up from school. Then he would busy himself in the apartment, making lunch for Emily, helping her with her homework, cooking and cleaning until he just ended up tiring himself out. Then they'd have dinner and he would just slump down on the couch, cuddling with James and watching tv after Emily had gone to bed.

He'd often end up falling asleep there, or else he would just go into their room and lie down, passing out immediately. James hadn't gotten laid in over a month, something Kendall frequently apologised for. "I'm just too tired, Jamie," he would say guiltily. James didn't mind much; he had no idea what Kendall was dealing with, after all.

The third bedroom in the apartment had even converted into a cute nursery, with soft pink painted on the walls and two identical cribs, long with the necessities like a changing table and a dresser for all their things. Everything was ready; all that was needed were the twins themselves. And when they did eventually come into the world, quite a lot of drama came with them.

One evening when the rain heavy poured down and the sky rumbled, Kendall met Camille in a little coffee shop to catch up.

"I hear you're engaged now," Kendall said to her with a grin. "To Dak Zevon. How's that going?"

"Oh, pretty good," Camille replied with a laugh. "And guess what!" She left space for a dramatic pause, before squealing, "I'm pregnant!"

"Oh my God!" Kendall exclaimed. "Congratulations! Does he know?"

"I told him last night." Camille giggled. "He fainted."

They both burst into laughter.

"Speaking of babies, when are you due?" Camille asked.

"The 17th," Kendall replied with a tired smile, resting a hand on his belly.

"Oh my God, that's not even two weeks from now!" she squealed in excitement. "I would've thought James would be keeping you in a three meter radius of him at all times."

"Oh, he tries to." Kendall rolled his eyes. He briefly glanced out the window at the stormy weather before turning back to Camille. "He's picking Emily up from her friend Jasmine's house. I just hope he actually found it."

They both laughed, because they both knew what James Diamond could be like when it came to directions. "Actually," Kendall added slowly, with an edge of disappointment in his voice. "That reminds me, I have to get home and make dinner."

He just managed to heave himself up out of his chair, pulling on his jacket.

Kendall's phone rang suddenly. He saw the caller ID was James, and immediately picked up. "Hello?" All he could hear was a buzzing noise. Bad connection. "James?" Still nothing. He hung up with a sigh.

A few minutes later it rang again. "James? I think there's a bad connection—"

_"Dad!—_buzz—_daddy, please!—scared—"_

"Emily? Are you ok?" Kendall was perplexed. And worried. "Where's James?"

_"Daddy—James—wrong—please—"_

"Um, ok, I'm coming." Kendall hurried towards his car, waving goodbye to Camille. He hopped in and started the engine. "Emmy, where are you?"

_"Daddy, help!"_

"I'm on my way, I just need to know where you are!"

_"—in the car, we hit something!"_

"Honey, what happened to James? Isn't he with you?"

_"He hit his head—not moving—I'm scared—"_

"Where are you?"

_"I don't know! There's . . . there's water—"_

"Water? Are you at a lake or something? Or near the beach?"

_"No, there's water in the car . . ."_

"In the car?" Kendall took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. The babies kicking at his stomach weren't helping. "Can you get out?"

_"No!"_

"It'll be ok, sweetie. Just listen to me, ok? When you were in the car where were you going?"

_"Home—"_

"Ok, did you see any hotels, or anything?"

_"I saw Grandma's hotel—"_

"Ok. Did you, did you see the park? And the ice rink?"

_"Yeah—there was a road—went through a fence—"_

"Emily?" More buzzing on the other end. "Dammit!" He flung the phone on the passenger seat and sped up the car. Fence . . . ok, they went past the rink, and the park . . . the canal. Shit, they had to be there. Shaking slightly, he sped up the car.

Kendall drove along parallel with the canal, keeping a close eye on the fence. He saw a gap. It was broken off. Kendall hit the brakes, the car skidding across the wet concrete. He was out of the car before it even came to a complete stop. He hurried over to the edge, looking down the bank. He saw James's car, tilted sideways. He could see James in the driver's seat. And Emily in the back. She saw him too, turning, screaming. "Daddy! Daddy, I'm down here!"

"Ok, just hang on, honey!" Kendall hurried to the trunk of the car, opening it up. He dug around in various junk until he finally pulled out the wrench he never used. He was so glad Logan always told him to be prepared. He ran back, sliding down the bank.

He groaned as his stomach lurched. The twins weren't happy. He slammed against the car, trying to ignore the dizziness. "Emily!"

She tapped on the glass, sobbing. "Daddy, help me!"

"Ok. Sweetie, I need you to listen carefully, ok? You need to turn around."

She did, and Kendall swung his arm around, smashing the glass window with the wrench. He reached in as Emily turned around to face him again, taking hold of her under the arms. He lifted her out slowly, panting as he rested her on the bank. She was still crying. "Are you alright now?"

She nodded shakily.

"Good. Ok, now I need you to crawl back up the bank, ok? And wait in the car."

"Ok." She had always been a good climber, and was up in a matter of seconds.

Kendall turned back and smashed the driver's seat window. He grimaced as shards flew everywhere, some striking James, who was still unconscious, blood in his hair. Kendall couldn't lift James out the window, he knew that. So he reached forward, the pain coming back when his stomach got in the way. He pulled the keys out of the ignition and unbuckled James's seatbelt. He hit 'unlock' on the keys, thanking his lucky stars that they still worked. Then he pulled open the door and dragged James out. For a second he lay there on the concrete bank, James next to him. He needed to get his breath back.

He rested a hand on his bulging stomach, where he could still feel the tapping of the babies' feet. "I'm sorry, darlings," he murmured, just managing to get back to his feet. Dragging James along, he finally made it back to the road, soaking wet from both sweat and the pouring rain. He managed to lift James into the backseat next to Emily, buckling him in. He got into his own seat, and started the car.

He turned back to look at his daughter, who was watching him with wide eyes. "Emmy, I need you to try and wake him up, alright? We'll be at the hospital soon."

"Ok."

Kendall drove along the deserted road, trying to see through the rain pouring down. He heard groaning from the back but didn't dare take his eyes off the road. Then he heard James mumble, "What am I sitting on? It's moving . . ."

Any other time Kendall would've laughed. Now he just sped up the car as they got closer to the hospital. As soon as they got there, Kendall hurried them to the reception and explained what had happened. She left them in one of the examination room and told them a doctor would be along to check them shortly.

They sat down in the exam room, James holding his head in pain as he slumped on the examination table. A few minutes later a handsome male doctor walked in. "Hello, everybody." He gave them all one brief look-over before asking, "What kind of car accident was this?"

"The car skidded and broke through a fence," Kendall answered. "James hit his head on the steering wheel, I think."

"I see. Well, that's not a problem." The doctor did a very brief check of James, before looking at Emily. "You didn't hurt yourself or anything, did you, sweetie?"

Emily shook her head, slightly shy.

"Ok, great. Well, there don't seem to be any serious injuries—"

Kendall squeaked with pain again as the babies kicked him. James immediately turned to look at the doctor. "Can you check him? He got us out of the car, but as you can see he's gonna have twins really soon and I'm just worried that . . ."

"Not a problem, I'll get right on that." The doctor smiled at Kendall, who gave a small smile back.

James couldn't help glaring jealously as the doctor helped Kendall into a wheelchair, still smiling all the way. "We'll be back in a few moments. And, honey," The man turned towards Emily. "If you can make sure your dad doesn't fall asleep, it would be very helpful."

They left, and James was left siting on the examination table with a pouty face. Emily sat in the chair next to him and watched him carefully. "Don't fall asleep, Dad."

"I know."

"Are the babies ok?" She looked worried, and it immediately caused James's expression to soften and his anger to decrease.

"I'm sure they are, honey. They just want to make sure."

"But what if they're hurt?"

"They're not, I promise you. They'll be just fine."

But when they ended up sitting there much longer than expected, James began to worry. What was taking them so long? Maybe the accident had caused something to happen to the twins after all.

Plus, his head was really killing him and that wasn't helping. He was convinced he might have a concussion because his head was starting to spin a little.

Twenty minutes had passed when the male doctor from before came hurrying into their exam room. "Mr Diamond, you may have to come with me now."

"Why?" James asked, immediately panicking. "Are the twins ok?"

"You could say that," the doctor replied a little breathlessly. "Considering Kendall's about to give birth to them."

James choked in nothing. "What? He's not due for another ten days!"

"I know that! But one second he was getting up and I was ready take him back here, and now he's gone into labor! We've got him in ward 3 down the hall."

The doctor hurried off, and James pulled out his phone, going straight to speed dial. He left a very panicked and angry voicemail, "Logan, answer your phone, Kendall's having the babies right now and Emily's here with me!" before hanging up and leading their daughter down the hallway after the doctor. He could already hear Kendall crying inside the room and burst in, unable to breathe. "Is he ok?"

No, he most definitely did not look ok. Kendall was lying on the bed, legs hanging up, wailing in pain as a nurse stood down at the end of the bed, murmuring words of encouragement to him as he pushed the first of the twins out. Tears were falling down his cheeks, his fists clenched so tightly they were red.

James hurried over to the bed, suddenly forgetting all about Emily. Kendall was in pain, and it scared him. "Kendall . . ."

"Jamie," Kendall gasped out, face scrunched up on pain. He reached out a hand for him almost blindly, James quickly grasping his hand in reassurance.

"It's ok, Kendall, you can do this."

"But it hurts—" Kendall cut off with another shriek of pain. "Uggh, ohh God . . ."

"D-Dad . . ."

James spun around to see Emily watching the whole procedure with scared eyes. "Emmy, he's ok, it's ok."

"But he's crying," Emily whimpered.

"I know, but he's going to be alright, and so are the twins. I promised, remember?"

There was a sudden knock on the door of the ward, and when a nurse went to check, Logan and Carlos came bursting in. "Oh, finally!" James breathed out in relief.

"I'm sorry, but you can't stay in here—" the nurse began, but Logan interrupted her. "We're only here to get Emily. Come on, sweetie."

"But, I don't have anything . . ."

" Take Kendall's keys," James said quickly, tossing them to Carlos. "I still have mine, you can go get her some clothes." James winced as he felt Kendall squeeze his hands tighter, if that was possible, gasping and moaning with pain. Then he screamed, the sound tearing at James's insides.

"Daddy, are you ok?" Emily asked, looking very frightened.

"I—nnggghhh—I'm fine, honey," Kendall managed to gasp, beckoning her over and leaning to kiss her forehead. "It's o-ok. Just go with them, it'll be alright . . . UUUGGGHH!"

Throwing his head back and sobbing breathlessly, Kendall only stared at the ceiling as Emily was taken from the room before she could see any more. "Is he alright?" James asked, clutching Kendall's hand tighter. "The pain is really bad!"

"The first twin is crowning, sweetie; it means her head is coming out, it's always the worst part."

Kendall screamed louder, eyes squeezed shut as an outburst of profanity came out, along with the first wailing twin. A push or two later, and she was out. A nurse quickly picked her up before James could really see her at all.

"How is she?" James asked, glancing at the nurses handling the baby and cutting the chord.

One of them chuckled. "She's a boy."

"What?" Kendall exclaimed, head snapping up. "Seriously—OW!"

"Ok, Kendall, ready for round two?" one nurse said with a reassuring smile, standing by him as the others took care of the baby.

Kendall groaned. "If I have to . . . ugh, God . . ."

James patted his hand gently with his own free hand, "It'll be over soon Kendall, and you can hold the twins, it's almost over."

Kendall wasn't paying any attention to him; he was screaming again, voice hoarse now as he whimpered and cried, worrying James all over again. And when this went on for a while, once the screaming got worse and James saw the nurse checking Kendall and watching for the baby, he couldn't help asking again. "Is he ok?"

"I'm not sure."

James choked. "W-what?"

"There's a problem with the second child," the nurse said briskly. "She's not moving down the way she should be. It can happen, but we're going to have to carry out a caesarian section, and we need your consent."

Kendall just nodded, whimpering quietly.

"Alright." The nurses immediately went to work, one grabbing the screen curtain, another getting a drip for Kendall's arm. The nurse who'd been speaking handed James some hospital scrubs. "On, now."

James did as he was told and hurried back over to Kendall, who immediately gripped onto his hand. The machine next to him beeped steadily, calming him down a tiny bit.

One of the nurses quickly moved to Kendall's other side. "Kendall, I need to give you the anaesthesia, can you roll onto your side?"

With James's help Kendall could, and the nurse dug the little needle into his back, the medication immediately taking effect and numbing his lower body. Rolling onto his back again, another nurse spread the screen over his chest so he couldn't see what they were doing. "Alright, we're going to make the incision," the nurse said steadily.

Kendall shook his head, panting. "Oh God, oh God—"

"Keep him calm," one of the nurses murmured to James. "He has to keep a steady heartbeat, don't let him panic."

"Um . . ." James moved back to Kendall, who was now close to hyperventilating. "Kendall, listen to me. I need you to listen to my voice, ok?"

Kendall stopped with wide and frightened eyes.

"I was thinking, when I was at work the other day, there was this little ad up on the wall, about writing advice and lifestyle columns once a week in the magazine. The old writer quit, or something. Chances are you probably won't go back to work again once we get home. I mean, they are three kids, after all. It can be from home and I thought you might enjoy it, to pass the time when you're at home. What do you think?"

Kendall gave a giddy little laugh, smiling up at him. "That sounds . . . n-nice . . ." Then he cut off, his free hand clutching his chest with a gasp.

"Kendall?" James stared at him, starting to panic.

"I-I can't breathe!" Kendall gasped out, shivering and gripping James's hand tighter, mouth wide open as he tried to take air into his lungs.

The machines beeping began to speed up and get louder very rapidly. "He can't breathe!" James yelled at the nurses, his panic suddenly too much as tears built up in his eyes. "Do something!"

One of the nurses immediately went and put an oxygen mask over Kendall's nose and mouth, the blonde's eyes drifting shut as the lack of air brought him in and out of consciousness. "It's a side effect of the anaesthesia," she explained to the terrified James. "It doesn't happen often, but it's ok, we can carry on with the surgery."

Another five minutes, and suddenly James heard high-pitched crying coming from where the nurses were. He looked over and his eyes widened as one of the nurses held the screaming baby in her arms, blood on her skin, her face scrunched up and her mouth wide open. James looked away, feeling slightly nauseous. And the worry for Kendall was overwhelming.

"Ohh . . . my head . . ." James stumbled backwards, hand on the wall to steady himself. "Shit, my head . . ."

"Sir, are you ok?"

"He was in a car accident," one of the nurses said. "He hit his head. Sit down, in case you pass out."

James slumped down into the hard plastic chair, head in his hands, eyes squeezed shut. "Everything's spinning . . ."

"Someone take him out, he's unstable—"

Who, who was unstable? Was Kendall unstable? James quickly stood up and immediately realised it was a mistake, as everything faded to black and he fell back to the floor.

* * *

><p>James's eyes fluttered open to gaze at a bright white ceiling. He sat up, realising he was lying on a hospital bed in a small ward, completely alone. There was an IV in his arm. He looked around wondering how the heck he got there and where Kendall was.<p>

Then a nurse from earlier walked in, smiling in greeting. "You're awake! Lovely. I'll just get rid of this for you, you don't need it anymore . . ."

The nurse removed the IV before doing things like checking his heartbeat and temperature. James just stared at her, still worried and terrified. "Kendall . . ."

"Kendall is fine," the nurse said with a reassuring smile. "Exhausted, of course, but perfectly fine. He's breathing normally again, all stitched up."

"Thank God," James breathed out, letting out a long sigh of relief. "Can I go see him?"

James was led down to Kendall's room. When he went inside, Kendall shifted slightly in the bed, blinking dazedly at him. "Jamie . . ."

James grinned at him, before rushing over to sit next to him, leaning down at kissing him gently. He rested his hand on Kendall's upper leg, rubbing it gently in hopes it would distract him from any pain. "How are you?"

"Sore," Kendall sighed, smiling back at him weakly. "I feel like I fell down a hill or something. How are you? The nurses told me you were in another ward."

"I'm ok. It was the car accident, but I'm fine now. They checked me over before they let me down here."

"Good, I'm glad you're alright."

There was a small pause.

"What happened to the first birth always being the worst?" Kendall murmured, eyes half closed. "That was horrible."

"Maybe twins are just more stressful," James replied with a shrug.

"Maybe. Hopefully there'll be no pregnancies with twins. I don't want to go through that again."

James's head snapped up. "So, you want more kids?"

"I don't know. We'll see what happens." Kendall gave a tired smile and held out his hand. James took it and squeezed it, smiling back at him. "How are the twins, anyway?"

"In the nursery. They kept crying and you needed rest so they took them away. They'll bring them back soon enough."

"Kay." Kendall shuffled backwards, half sitting up, a hand on his stomach with a pained expression. "So, a boy and a girl. That was unexpected."

"I know, right?" James chuckled, before his face turned serious again. "You really scared me earlier, with the girl, when they had to give you a section. I thought . . . I thought I'd lose you."

A weak hand lifted up and gently cupped James's cheek. "Have faith, Jamie. I'm fine."

"I know."

It was that moment when a nurse walked in, wheeling a cot into the room with her. "Ready to meet the twins?" she greeted with a smile.

Both parents nodded eagerly, as she picked up the babies one at a time, handing the boy to James and the girl to Kendall, both wrapped in a blue and a pink blanket to separate them.

"Naming time," James announced, bouncing the little boy lightly. "Any suggestions for this little guy?"

"Since I'm still half asleep, I'll admit nothing comes to mind right now. Do you have something?"

"Well, uh, I was thinking about it before . . . and I thought, maybe . . . how about Adam?" James suggested, almost embarrassed to say it out loud.

"That's perfect," Kendall smiled. "Um, now the girl. Do you have that name list?"

"Um . . . nope," James replied with a chuckle. "I never got around to putting it in my phone."

"That's fine, I think I can remember them anyway." Kendall smiled down at the newborn girl. "But, I don't know about you, I think she looks like a Hannah."

"Hannah it is." James grinned. "I have a great middle name for her."

"Yeah, what is it?"

James smiled at Kendall. "Faith."

* * *

><p>"Hi, honey!" James greeted, hugging the little girl who came charging across Carlos and Logan's living room towards him. "How was your night here?"<p>

"I couldn't sleep that much, I was worried about Dad." Her eyes were wide, and indeed very worried. "Is he ok?"

Logan and Carlos were both standing behind her, the same question clearly on their minds. "Dad is fine," James told her with a smile. "He's tired, but just fine. And the twins are ok too, and guess what, honey? They're a boy and a girl!"

Emily squealed, "A baby brother _and_ sister?"

"Uh huh." James straightened up so he was now addressing the three people standing in the room. "Adam Robert and Hannah Faith Diamond."

"Nice," Logan commented with a grin.

"Can we go see them?" Emily asked impatiently.

"I don't see why not. These two idiots can come with us, if they want."

"Oh, don't be silly, of course we want to come!" Carlos practically shouted, running to grab his car keys. "You're probably still tired, so I'll drive! Now let's go!"

James was pretty tired. After leaving Kendall and driving home pretty much in the middle of the night, he'd only managed to get a couple of hours of sleep. They drove back to the hospital and followed the long hallways to Kendall's room. When they walked in quietly, James grinned when he saw Kendall curled up in the bed, fast asleep on his side and looking so damn innocent and adorable.

Emily kicked her shoes off and climbed onto the bed, lying down next to Kendall and cuddling up next to him. James smiled at the sight. "There they are," he said softly, pointing to the twins in the hospital cots by the bed. "Adam and Hannah."

"They're gorgeous!" Carlos whisper-shouted, earning a slap on the shoulder from Logan. "Sorry, I know, silence . . ."

But it was too late. Hannah's eyes and mouth opened and she gave a little whimper, which soon turned into a wail. James stared at her, completely frozen in horror. "Oh God, I'm supposed to be her father! What the hell do I do?"

"Um, try rocking her," Logan suggested, looking just as worried as James was.

James leaned down and carefully picked the crying baby up, rocking her a little. "Come on, be quiet, Kendall is sleeping, shhh . . ."

She did not obey him, wailing a little louder, her face turning a little red.

"Oh no, please be quiet!" James was getting desperate, and frustrated. He clearly wasn't cut out to be a parent of he couldn't even—

"Jamie, let me take her."

James turned to see Kendall slowly sitting up in bed, eyelids fluttering sleepily. He held out his arms, yawning a little. "Come on, she's giving me a headache."

James handed her over reluctantly, and watched with amazement as only a few seconds of Kendall's rocking her gently lulled her into silence. Kendall looked up and smiled at James. "It takes practice, you'll get better. Don't worry about it."

James still felt like a moron as he watched Kendall take care of the baby so expertly. Then again, he'd had practice with Emily. James hadn't.

"Do you wanna hold her, sweetie?" James watched with a smile as Kendall slowly set Hannah down in Emily's arms, the blonde girl's eyes lighting up at the feeling of responsibility that came with this.

"She's so little," Emily said softly, beaming at her baby sister.

"Well, she's gonna get bigger, and start walking, and talking. It all takes time."

Kendall and the twins left the hospital the next morning, strapped into the backseat in baby chairs on either side of Emily. When they got home, Emily was eager to play with them, but to her disappointment all they did was sleep. "They're not that fun," she pouted as she watched them.

"They're too small to play with now, hun," James said reassuringly, patting her on the back with the hand that wasn't wrapped around Kendall's waist, half holding the exhausted blonde up. Kendall stayed in bed for the rest of the afternoon, getting up again in the evening to join the rest of them and insist that he make dinner.

"James, the last thing we need is the smoke alarm waking the kids up," he said its a roll of his eyes when James protested.

The next day, James and Kendall invited their families over and some more close friends to see the twins. Fair enough, the babies still spent most of it asleep, but everyone cooed and doted over them nonetheless.

"It's funny," Katie commented as she cuddled Hannah while her mother held Adam. "How Emily has James's eyes but looks like Kendall, and now these two look like James, and have Kendall's eyes."

"Adam doesn't," Kendall smiled, currently sitting in James's lap on the loveseat while the guests crowded around the babies. "He looks just like his father."

That night, Kendall and James left Emily watching cartoons while they brought the twins to bed. Holding Adam in his arms, James had never felt happier in his life. He was the father of three beautiful children, and got to spend every day with them and the most perfect person in the world by his side. He was so glad Jett had obnoxiously flirted with Kendall those days back when they were sixteen.

James tucked the sleeping Adam into his crib, kissing him goodnight gently before straightening up, turning on the nightlight and the little music player, a soft lullaby immediately beginning to echo around the room.

"I love you," James said softly as Kendall turned around from tucking Hannah into her crib.

"I love you too," Kendall whispered back, walking into his open arms. "So, Jamie, about that house . . ."

"I'll take a look at the paper tomorrow morning."

**Mmkay, I ended it there for a reason. It's an open emding. So it's the end of the story, right? OR IS IT?**

**See, I'm thinking of doing a oneshot collection or sorts, about Kendall and James raising the children as they get older and bla bla bla. You know, James's first time looking after the twins alone, a Christmas one, high school, getting lost, all this kind of stuff. However, my question is; if you want this, do you want it as part of this story or a separate thing altogether? There would probably be the occasional smut scene so it would probably still be rated M. And I might take requests, but I'm not too sure yet.**

**DO YOU WANT THIS, AND IF SO, HOW? Review and tell me, and also tell me your thoughts on this chapter and the rest of the story!**


	18. Out of the Blue

**These oneshots are mostly gonna be in order, but there will be a couple that go back in time. The first oneshot I was gonna do was going to be where James watches the twins alone for the first time, but I couldn't really write it well. So I did this instead :) I'll still do the other one, just not for a while. Hope you like it! XD**

"Hey, Kendall!" James greeted, walking into the apartment. "Where are you?"

"Kitchen!" Kendall called from his place by Hannah's high chair. He was plcaing a little bowl of puréed peas on the table as he looked in the drawers for a plastic spoon, bouncing Adam slowly in his other arm. The twins were now seven months old, which meant they were crawling and they'd started to eat solid foods at last. "Hi, Jamie," he smiled, eyes still on the baby's food. "What are you doing here?"

"Well, I've got my lunch break now, so I figured I'd come home and see my beautiful family," James chuckled. "Turn around, babe."

Kendall did, and grinned. "Aww. You bought me flowers?"

"I did," James grinned, placing them on the table. "Do you like them?"

"Yeah, they're great. What's the occasion?" Kendall asked, kissing James gently.

"I just felt like it," James shrugged, smiling. "Is that so weird?"

"No. It's sweet." Kendall handed Adam over to James. "Hold him for a second? He's being so clingy today. I'll find a vase to put them in, I think we have one somewhere . . ."

He dug around in the cupboard under the sink while James held Adam, bouncing him and listening to his high-pitched giggles.

Kendall filled up a glass vase with water and placed the flowers in, setting them in the middle of the kitchen table. He pulled his chair forward and sat down on front of Hannah, picking up the baby food. "So how's work today?"

"Oh, it's fine. Uneventful, really."

"Yeah?" Kendall held out a spoonful of the food for Hannah, sighing when she turned her head away. "She eats fine every other day . . . so no exciting stories to tell me?"

"Not a thing." James sat down with Adam still in his arms. "Want me to pick Emily up today?"

"Oh, you don't have to do that—"

"No, it's fine! It'll only take half an hour off work, tops. I might end up staying a little later tonight, but you don't mind, do you? You just seem busy here, it might be easier if I picked her up."

"Mmm," Kendall replied absent-mindedly, smiling as Hannah swallowed another spoonful of the food. "Good girl!"

"Are you listening?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah!" Kendall leaned over and gave James a peck on the lips. "Thanks so much, Jamie. I'm just a little tired today, I'm sorry . . ."

"No, don't worry." James glanced around the kitchen. It was a bit of a mess; dirty dishes piled up on the sink, the babies' things littered all over the floor. "Want me to tidy up a bit in here?"

"I can do it. Wait, hold on." Kendall stood up, holding the baby food out to James. "You have a go at feeding her, you need to get used to it. I'll clean."

He took Adam from James and lay him down on the baby rug he'd placed on the floor. Immediately the baby started whimpering, wanting to be picked up again. Then Kendall handed him his rattle and he quietened down immediaitely.

"When did you say they were gonna start talking?" James asked curiously as he held a spoonful out to Hannah, cooing at her with a grin.

"Oh, not until they're at least a year old." Kendall sighed as he filled the sink up with warm water. "They're meant to start walking soon enough; that'll be a nightmare."

"I know what you mean," James chuckled. "We'll never sleep again."

Kendall laughed, scrubbing at a pot with the cloth as he looked up at the clock. His face fell. "You need to get back to work soon."

"Yeah, you're right," James sighed. "I'll finish feeding Hannah first, she's almost done."

Once Hannah had finished, James got up, grabbed his jacket snd kissed Kendall goodbye. Then he kissed Hannah goodbye, and when Adam crawled after him he kissed him goodbye too.

"Oh, one last thing!" James turned to look at Kendall before he left. "Do you wanna go out for dinner tomorrow night? I think you deserve it."

Kendall's face lit up in a huge grin. "That'd be wonderful."

"Cool! We can find a babysitter. Love you!"

"Love you too!"

As soon as James left, Kendall hurried over and lifted Hannah up out of her chair, removing her bib (which was clean for once) and putting her down on the rug. He took out his phone and quickly called Logan, putting the phone on speaker and setting it on the counter as he resumed washing the dishes.

_"Logie speaking!"_ came the cheerful voice.

"Hey, Logan!" Kendall chuckled to himself as he set the frying pan out on the draining board. "Listen, I need a favour."

_'Yeah?"_

"I was wondering if—_no!_"

_"Huh?"_

Kendall dashed over to Hannah, prying her off the tilting umbrella stand. "Don't touch that!" He picked Adam up in his other arm and brought them into the living room, sitting them down in the corner, safely fenced up in the playpen.

He ran back into the kitchen. "Sorry, Logan, the twins were giving me trouble."

_"It's cool,"_ Logan chuckled. _"You were saying?"_

"I might need a babysitter for tomorrow night."

_"Oh yeah? Why's that?"_

"I'm going out with James, for dinner," Kendall replied, unable to help smiling. He gave a happy sigh. "I think . . . he's been so sweet lately, and I think this might be the night."

_"No . . ."_ Logan squealed. _"You're kidding! Oh my God! You think he's gonna propose to you!"_

"Well, I don't know," Kendall replied shyly, blushing. "It just seems like he's been thinking about it, y'know?"

_"I get that."_ He heard Logan laugh happily. _"This is so exciting!"_ A pause. _"So, you need me to watch the kids?"_

"Maybe. I know you'll have Grace to look after, so I'll try to fnd someone else. But if nobody else can . . . would you mind?"

_"No, it's cool! I can bring Grace over there if I have to, it'll be fine."_

"Thanks, Logan!" Kendall smiled to himself; he was probably getting worked up for no reason, but he couldn't help it. He was getting so excited! He loved James so much, this was all he'd ever wanted. And now it seemed it was finally going to happen.

_"No problem. I've gotta go, so I'll talk to you later!"_

"Ok, bye!"

Kendall hung up, having finished washing the dishes. He left them to drain and walked into the living room, picking up all the babies' stuff as he did.

As he walked in, the twins began whining, holding their little hands up to him. "Hi, darlings," he cooed, kneeling down inside the playpen. "Have you been behaving yourselves? I've got good news for you two." He smiled to himself. "Daddy might be getting married soon."

* * *

><p>"You seem really happy, Mom," Kendall smiled.<p>

He was sitting in the loving room of the old Palmwoods apartment. He'd been there all afternoon; Katie was babysitting that night, and had offered to babysit in the afternoon too, if she was paid. James told Kendall he would phone him with details about their dinner date amd when he needed to get home and get ready.

"Well, so do you," Kendall's mother replied happily. She was sitting on the couch with her boyfriend John, their hands intertwined. Well, her fiancé, now; they'd just got engaged three days ago. "Thank you, honey. And you and James seem to be doing well. How are the kids?"

"They're fine," Kendall replied with a grin. Well, maybe his mother wouldn't be the only Knight to get engaged soon enough. God, he really, really hoped so! "It can be tough though, keeping an eye on two babies at the same time. But I'm managing."

"That's good." She laughed. "So, I believe he's taking you to dinner tonight?"

"Yup. We haven't been out properly without the kids since the twins were born, so I can't wait!" Kendall glanced at his watch with a frown. "I thought he would've called me by now, though." He reached for his phone. "I'll just text him—"

Then there was a knock on the door, before it opened and James strode in. "Hey, Mama Knight, hi John!"

"Hello, James," they both smiled.

Kendall stood up and walked over to James. "What are you doing here?" he asked, puzzled. "And what's in the bag?" Then he realised James was wearing a crisp white shirt, a black blazer and black slacks, looking very neat and tidy.

James handed Kendall the duffel bag with a grin. "Your shirt, jacket and slacks, and your shoes. Everything folded very neatly and ready for you to change into. I stopped at home before I came here, to change and make sure Katie was ok. And I figured I'd take your clothes and pick you up from here!"

"But my car . . ."

"We can pick it up in the morning, ok? Come on, babe." James leaned down and kissed Kendall gently. "Go change."

Kendall couldn't help smiling. "Ok." He walked off down the hall, quickly changing in one of the bedrooms and stuffing his other clothes into the duffel bag, zipping it up and walking back out. James whistled when he saw him, chuckling as he walked over and grabbed Kendall's hips, pulling him in for a kiss. Kendall smiled, one hand lightly running through James's hair, careful not to mess it up too much.

James pulled back at last, grinning as he pressed a quick kiss to Kendall's forehead. "Alright, let's get going. Don't wanna miss our reservation."

"I'll see you soon, Mom!" Kendall called, as James dragged him out the door. "Bye, John!"

James held his hand as they walked down the hallway, swinging their hands back and forth and chatting all the way to the elevator. "I got reservations for Marconi's. You know, the Italian place with the marble statues? I know you love that place."

"I do. Thanks, Jamie." Kendall leaned up and kissed his cheek, grinning. "It sounds perfect."

"Good. I wanted tonight to be special."

"Oh yeah?" Kendall's smile widened. "Why is that?"

"Oh, no reason." James kissed Kendall again as they entered the elevator. "Just that I love you."

Ok," Kendall giggled, cheeks pink. _Oh my God oh my God—_

James led Kendall to the car, opening the passenger's side door and closing it after him, before walking around and hopping into the driver's seat. "What date are Mama Knight and John thinking about for their wedding?" James asked as he started the car.

"Oh, they don't know yet. Another six months at least. They haven't started any of the planning yet." Kendall couldn't help smiling. "I have a feeling Mom wants a huge ceremony though. Apparently her and my dad had a fairly quiet wedding. She wants to go big this time. That's why it's gonna take longer."

"Well, I can't wait," James chuckled. "Open bar, yay!"

Kendall rolled his eyes. "So you like weddings becaue they have an open bar where you can get wasted?"

"Nope." James briefly glanced at Kendall with a smirk. "I like weddings because they have an open bar where I can get _you_ wasted."

Kendall bit his lip, cheeks flushing yet again. "Oh . . ."

"Well, you're not protesting, so shall I take it you'll agree to this?"

"I would . . . but the kids."

"Oh, I could watch the four of you at the same time. And then when I got you home and they were gone to bed . . ." James's smirk widened. "I hope they're heavy sleepers."

"James!" Kendall squeaked, cheeks turning even darker. But he couldn't help laughing. And thinking about that idea. He bit his lip, trying to hide his smile by looking out the window at the streets of LA.

"We're here," James announced as they pulled into the restaurant parking lot. He stopped the car in a space close to the door, unbuckling his seatbelt and turning to smile at Kendall. "Hungry?"

Kendall nodded eagerly, opening his seatbelt too. "Starving." Then he suddenly leaned forward, took hold of James's cheeks and pulled him in for a kiss. James gave a happy sigh, grabbing Kendall and pulling him forward by the hips so he was practically on the brunette's lap. Kendall slid his tongue into James's mouth, unable to help moaning when James's hands slid down to grab his butt and his tongue pressed up against Kendall's.

Then James pulled back, breathing deeply as he stared into Kendall's eyes. "I swear," he whispered huskily, leaning and nipping on Kendall's ear. "You have no idea how tempted I am to just throw you in the backseat and take you, right here and right now."

Kendall smirked, leaning in to kiss him again. But James only kissed him back for a second before pulling away. "Come on, let's go inside. There's always afterwards."

Kendall nodded and pulled away, and they both got out of the car. They walked into the restaurant arm in arm and up to the maitre d, a bald man in a black suit. "Reservation for Diamond?" James said to him, making Kendall grin. Diamond, Diamond . . .

Ok, he was really losing his mind.

"This way, gentlemen." They were led to a table in the corner, where they were handed two menus. "Do you wanna get a glass of wine or anything?" James asked Kendall. "I mean, I can't since I'll be driving . . ."

"No, it's ok. I'm fine with water or something." Kendall bit his lip as he read through the long list of Italian dishes. They all looked good, but right now he couldn't concentrate. He was too nervous, too excited . . . and probably completely overreacting. He didn't know for sure James was going to propose, it was just a wild guess! Really, there was so reason to get so hyped up over it.

"Kendall?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

Kendall smiled. "Where did that come from?"

"What, I can't just say it out of the blue?" James asked, putting on an offended expression.

"I love you too, James."

"That's more like it."

Ok, maybe there was reason to get excited after all.

During their dinner, the waiter serving them greeted them every time with a winning smile and a coy wink. It was only as James reached out and took hold of Kendall's hand when he came to collect their plates that the waiter's mood seemed to deteriorate. "You know he was flirting with you, right?" James said the second he was out of earshot.

"Oh. Yeah, I know. Why does it matter?" Kendall chuckled. "You've no idea how many people flirt with you when we're out together. I don't let it bother me."

"Why not?" James asked, looking puzzled. "Don't you care?"

"Oh, of course I care! But the thing is, I know you wouldn't be unfaithful to me. Or leave me for some cheap slut. Wanna know why?"

"Why?"

Kendall grinned. "Reason one, three children you don't wanna risk losing. Reason two . . . you're afraid I'd get over you."

"What makes you think that?"

"I can tell. That's why it took you so long to come back the first time." Kendall leaned forward, looking James right in the eye. "You know I love you, Jamie."

"And you know I love you, right?"

"Right."

James grinned and pulled Kendall in for a kiss, not minding they both had to lean over the table to do so. When the both pulled away after a minute or two, James smiled and held up a little menu. "Dessert?"

"I'd love that, but I'm so full," Kendall chuckled.

"Ok, let's see . . ." James lead down the list. And he gave a knowing smile, looking back at Kendall.

"They have that little strawberry cheesecake. We can share one if you like."

Kendall nodded. "Ok. That sounds nice." And of course James remembered that the strawberry cheesecake was Kendall's favourite thing _ever_.

"Wow, you're smiling like crazy, aren't you?" James teased as he called the waiter over.

"I can't help it," Kendall grinned. "I'm just really happy tonight."

"Me too," James replied sweetly, before turning and ordering the dessert.

Kendall was beaming. Ok, never on any date night had James been this sweet. Not ever. They each took turns eating spoonfuls of the cake, chatting and laughing. James was repeatedly complimenting him, making him blush and giggle like a dumb schoolgirl. James had always had that effect on him.

"You know, you're the cutest ever when you blush," James grinned, giving Kendall a little wink.

"No I'm not . . ."

"You are, babe."

Kendall smiled shyly.

"You want the last spoonful?" James offered, pushing the plate towards him.

"Sure. Thanks, Jamie."

"Listen, Kendall," James began.

Kendall glanced up, eyes wide. He bit his lip. "Yeah?"

"There's something I've been meaning to ask you all night." James cleared his throat nervously. "God, I just can't stop thinking about it, and it's got me all nervous but I need to get it out, sooner rather than later."

"Yes?" Kendall could feel his cheeks turning pink; could this finally be the moment?

"I wanted to ask . . ."

_Oh, please say it James!_

"Emily was talking about boys the other day. And it got me thinking, when do you think she'll be old enough for a boyfriend?"

Kendall's face fell. He'd never felt disappointment like this; not ever.

"Kenny?"

"Hmm? Oh." Kendall took a deep breath and forced a smile on his face. "Well, I don't know. What do you think?"

"I don't know either! I mean, I don't want to be a complete killjoy parent but at the same time I don't want her to be one of those skanks who loses their virginity at twelve years old . . ."

Kendall couldn't help laughing. "Well, I guess maybe thirteen or fourteen. How old were we when we started dating?"

"I was about twelve when I got my first girlfriend, I think." James chuckled. "She was hot."

Kendall folded his arms, scowling.

"I m-mean, at the time," James stuttered quickly. "Obviously you're hotter, obviously. You know I love you, babe."

If you love me, why don't you ask me, you idiot?! But Kendall smiled sweetly. "I know, Jamie." He leaned forward and kissed James on the cheek.

James grinned. "Good. So, how old were you when you had your first girl? You were like, fourteen or smething, weren't you?" He smirked teasingly. "Before that you were too short for any of them to take interest in you."

"Hey, stop making fun of that!" Kendall rolled his eyes, "I wasn't even into them, you know that now."

"Hmm." James bit his lip. "I know you came out to us when we were fifteen . . . but what about before that?"

"Hmm?"

"Did you date any guys, like before you told us?"

Kendall paused, thinking. He couldn't help smiling. "Well, there were one or two . . ."

"Did I know them?" James asked instantly, jealous-boyfriend-mode in action.

"Well, a couple. Let's see . . ." Kendall couldn't resist having little fun with this. "There was Greg Johnston. You know, the senior?"

"Him?" James looked amazed—and furious. "You dated that guy? But he was such an ass, he had a girl a week!"

"Actually, he didn't." Kendall was giggling. "We only dated for a couple of months; he was in the closet, apparently. He was a really nice guy."

"Who else?"

"Sam . . . oh, I forget his last name. I think he was in your Spanish class?"

"Sam Anderson? Really?" James gave a sigh. "Anyone else I should know about?"

Kendall smirked. "No, they're the only two that were in our school. There was another guy I met at a hockey camp, then this one guy I ran into at the park once—"

"Well, I hope you never see any of them again," James replied abruptly. "You're mine."

"I know I am," Kendall grinned. Making James jealous of past flings he had absolutely no interest in was so much fun. It made him feel wanted. Made him feel better about what hadn't happened tonight.

But then James called a waiter over and asked for the bill, and Kendall felt disappointed all over again. James paid and grabbed Kendall by the hand, leading him out towards the doors. The drive home was quiet, except for when James asked him to text Katie and tell her they were on their way home. Not that he knew why, but he didn't really care enough to ask. The walk through the lobby of the building and into the elevator was just as silent. As they stepped in, James grinned, wrapping his arm around Kendall's waist and pulling him tight up against his body. "Maybe when we get inside, we can get some whipped cream, maybe some syrup . . ."

"Ok, whatever," Kendall sighed, leaning on James's shoulder and trying to smile.

"Are you alright?" James asked as they left the elevator, walking towards their apartment. "You seem quiet."

"I'm ok," Kendall sighed as they walked towards door. "I guess I just . . . I thought that—"

"Hold that thought."

Kendall stopped, eyes narrowed. "Excuse me?"

"One second, ok?" James was fishing around in his pocket. "You know what? I think I left my apartment key behind. I'm not sure . . ." He turned to Kendall with an sly smile. "Lead the way, princess?"

"Ugh," Kendall snarled, storming ahead of him and pulling out his keys. "You are just unbelievable, James Diamond!"

"What did I do?"

"You're impossible! Do you seriously not get that I thought you would—"

Kendall stopped, the door hanging open. James smirked, hand diving into his jacket pocket.

The apartment was empty; Katie was nowhere in sight. The apartment hallway was decorated with roses, every kind of colour. They were all over the place, making a path down the hallway and into the living room. Kendall followed it slowly, a dumbfounded expressed on his face. And as he walked into the living room, up on the doorframe hung a huge banner, little photos of Kendall and James stuck all over the outside, like a frame.

_Will you marry me?_

Kendall turned around to stare at James, and found he had to look down. James was down on one knee, open ring box held out in his hand. He was grinning. "I figured I would surprise you," he smiled softly. "Are you surprised?"

Kendall nodded dumbly, before reaching out and slapping James across the face. Hard.

"Ow!"

"You idiot," Kendall giggled, eyes full of tears. "You've been winding me up all night on purpose, haven't you?"

"Uh huh," James nodded, free hand on his stinging cheek. "I thought it'd be funny. And it was. For me, at least."

"You're unbelievable, James Diamond," Kendall repeated, biting his lip at the end of his sentence. His cheeks hurt from how wide his smile was.

"That's why you love me." James paused. "So, um . . . you haven't answered yet."

"Oh, right." Kendall gave a choked laugh, nodding eagerly. "Yes, yes I will marry you. I want it more than anything. Though you knew that already, didn't you!"

James chuckled, picking up the ring and taking Kendall's left hand sliding it onto his ring finger as he stood up. "Yeah, I knew."

Kendall wrapped his arms around James's neck, pulling him in for a hard kiss. James wound his arms around Kendall's waist, holding him tightly as Kendall's tongue slid along his lips. James opened his mouth and pushed his tongue out against Kendall's, moaning happily as he squeezed Kendall's ass. Kendall ended up slamming back against the wall, breathless as he leaped up into James's arms and wound his legs around his waist. "Are we gonna clean that stuff up?" James asked with a smirk, hands moving to grip Kendall's hips.

"Leave it until the morning," Kendall replied, panting as James latched onto his neck. "We can clean up the flowers then. But I want the banner there for a while. It's wonderful; did you make it?"

"Well, I needed help getting some of the photos, but yeah, I did," James replied, running a hand up under Kendall's shirt. "You like it?"

"I love it. I love you." Kendall kissed James again, hands gripping his hair tightly as James carried him down the hall to their room.

James placed Kendall carefully on the bed, moving in between his legs as he stuck his tongue right down the blonde's throat. Kendall moaned breathlessly, mouth hanging open as he started unbuttoning James's shirt. "How much do you like this shirt?" James pulled back to ask, hands gripping the collar of Kendall's blue shirt.

"Umm, not much I guess. It's a shirt."

So James's hands moved down and he ripped Kendall's shirt open, the buttons clattering over the floor. Instantly his lips were on Kendall's chest, sucking and biting at his nipples as his hands struggled to push the shirt completely off Kendall's arms. Kendall was moaning and writhing against him, legs wrapped around him again as he ground their hips together.

Then the air filled with one long, piercing sound.

A baby crying.

Then two babies crying.

"You've got to be kidding me!" James groaned. "Babe, can't we ignore them?"

Kendall chuckled, pushing James off him reluctantly. "That's another thing about babies. They frequently interrupt sexy time."

"I'm gonna remember this when they're old enough to be grounded." James couldn't help laughing too as he got off the bed, Kendall following him as they walked to the twins' room.

"You realise now," James said as they walked inside and he picked up the crying twin closest to him; Hannah. "That since we're engaged, it's gonna move the new house back another bit. Weddings cost money."

"I know they do," Kendall smiled as he picked up Adam. "But we don't have to go crazy on it. We can have a simple wedding, can't we? And I don't see why we should wait too long to do it."

"I agree. We'll need to plan a lot."

"I'm at home all day; I can take care of it. I'll probably be calling you at work a little to get your opinion, but I can make the calls and talk to the right people, yeah?"

"Yeah, good." James leaned down and kissed him gently. "I can't wait for this."

"Neither can I, Jamie." He pulled back, pausing. "Katie knew, didn't she?"

"What makes you say that?"

"Well, you got me to text her when we were coming home. And she wasn't here. So she must've known . . ."

"Wow, you could be a detective," James chuckled. "Yeah, she knew. I was keeping the banner in her and your mom's place, she brought it over this afternoon. Then she scattered some roses with me, and we made a plan to ensure she'd be gone when you got home."

"I guess I'll have to thank her," Kendall giggled, resting his forehead against James's shoulder as he rocked Adam back to sleep. "I love you."

"I love you too." James grinned. "I hope the twins are heavy sleepers."

**I hope you liked this! XD I decided I will take requests for this if people have them! HOWEVER. I'd rather do most of the oneshots I already have planned first! So if you have a request, hold it until I start taking them, please!**

**Review? :)**


	19. Author's Note

So, listen. All I've really got for this story is a couple of oneshots in progress that are really only a couple of hundred words long and nothing more. I can't really get the words out for some reason, I just seem to be lacking inspiration :/ so I think I'll take some requests if anyone has some. If not, I'll leave this story on hiatus I guess, and come back to it sometime when or if I have the drive to do so. There's also new stuff I wanna work on, so . . .

If you have something in particular you want me to do, let me know in a review. That's all I have to say, I guess :)

If it so happens that people think the story is better left finished here, then imma just say I enjoyed writing it and getting all your feedback. Thanks so much! :D *big hug*


	20. I Love You More

**Okay, so this is the last chapter. I've tied what people wanted to happen into this long thing of a few different years :P at the start of each part will be the time of year and the ages of the children. Enjoy!**

**_July 8th — Emily 8, twins 1_**

"And this," the saleswoman said, leading Kendall and James through the back door. "This is the backyard. Spacious, as you can see. Lots of room for the children, some flower beds at the back."

"The place is really nice," Kendall agreed, glancing up at James. "Good neighbourhood too. It's safe, know what I mean?"

James nodded. "And the kids have all got their own room, and we've got one spare."

Kendall walked back into the empty kitchen, looking around one more time. "Jamie, if you love it as much as I do . . ."

James nodded, turning towards the saleswoman and holding out his hand. "We'll take it."

"Great!" She shook his hand, glancing down at the simple gold band around his fingers. "You two are married, then?"

"Yeah, but just for a couple of months," James grinned, wrapping an arm around Kendall's waist. "It wasn't anything hugely exciting; we wanted to save up for this place."

"Well, you made the right choice!"

"I always think salespeople are so overly peppy," Kendall said sometime later, as he and James unpacked the twins' things into their rooms. They'd left the children staying with their grandma until they'd unpacked the majority of their things, they could sort out redecorating and other things at a later stage. The children were coming to the house that evening.

"I do too," James chuckled, folding up the last of Hannah's clothes and shutting the drawer. "But on the bright side, we've got this awesome place now. It's perfect!"

"That's true." Kendall stacked up the last of the empty boxes, giving a tired smile. "There, all done! Maybe at the weekend the kids can stay with your mom and we can start painting the place the way we all want."

"I guess that could be arranged," James grinned, looking around the room with a kind of wonder in his eyes. "So . . . yeah. Wow, this is really happening."

Kendall nodded, holding his hand. "It feels kind of surreal; never thought this would be happening to me . . . that I'd be here with you, together with Emily and two more children, married and moving into a cute house together with a picket fence and everything."

"Like some kind of modern fairytale, right?" James teased.

"Exactly," Kendall teased back, pecking him on the nose. He heard a knock on the door and grinned. "Okay, they're here!"

They showed the children around the house, letting them run around and examine each and every room, before sprinting around the garden and squealing in excitement. "You like it, right?" James asked at last as they gathered in their new living room. "I know it's a bit of a change, but trust me, this place is better for us. There's a lot more room, it's easier to go back and forth since it's not in the middle of the city anymore."

Emily nodded like she kind of understood. Hannah and Adam just smiled sweetly up at them. They ordered pizza and ate together while watching some Disney movie where the pretty girl and the handsome guy got together in the end. Really, it could've been any of them. James couldn't remember. Though he could swear there'd been a frog in it somewhere. Afterwards, they put the children to bed and kissed them goodnight. Emily seemed perfectly content, while the twins seemed slightly uneasy but happy to settle down for the night.

Kendall lay down in their own bed, snuggling into James' side. "Our first official night together in our new home. Feels good, right?"

James nodded, grinning and nuzzling Kendall's cheek fondly. "But, you know . . . I don't think it's official until we've had sex in this room."

"Wow, you're blunt."

"You love me for it."

"I guess I do." Kendall cuddled closer, hand on James' chest as he leaned in to kiss him. "Okay then. Let's make it official before I get too drowsy."

James licked a line down Kendall's neck, the blind moaning softly and pressing his hips against James' thigh. "You have no idea how sexy you are when you make those noises, do you?" James rasped against his pale neck. "I mean, it's like, gay porn kind of sexy."

Kendall laughed, hand playing with James' hair lightly. "Maybe I should be a porn star, then."

"No," James replied bluntly. "No one's going to watch you have sex with someone else."

"No complaints there."

Kendall straddled James' lap and continued to kiss him. James grinned against the blond's lips, wrapping his arms snugly around his waist and pushing his shirt up.

Then suddenly, they heard the click of the door opening. Kendall rolled off his husband and lay sprawled on the bed, biting his lip. James looked to see Adam standing in the doorway, holding onto the door handle. "Adam?"

Adam pouted, sucking his thumb.

James gave a small chuckle. "I guess it's a bit strange sleeping in a new house, right?"

Adam nodded, still suckling on his thumb. He blinked up at them with large green eyes. James just gave him a tired smile, lifting the covers and getting up to go over to him. He picked his son up in his arms, kissing his forehead before walking back to the bed and sitting him down between himself and Kendall. Kendall tickled under Adam's chin, making him giggle and kick his small feet.

James suddenly felt a little hand tugging at his hair and turned to see Hannah standing by the bed, frowning. She lifted her arms, and he sighed before picking her up too. "Didn't want to be left out, I suppose," Kendall shrugged, nestling close to them. "My wittle babies."

Hannah giggled. Kendall tapped her on the nose and she laughed louder. Then James prodded her in the side and she squealed. "Okay, okay," James said at last, laughing. "We need to be quiet, or Emmy's gonna wake up."

"Too late."

Emily stood at the door in her Hello Kitty pyjamas, rubbing at her eye sleepily. "Sorry sweetie," Kendall said. "We didn't mean to wake you."

Emily shrugged, yawning before mumbling, "Can I sleep here tonight too?"

"We can probably squeeze you in."

Kendall and James found themselves lying on the opposite sides of the bed, their three children snuggled in between them. "Now, go to sleep," James said sternly. "Or we'll all be like zombies in the morning."

The twins were already falling asleep, and Emily's eyes were closed. Kendall smiled softly over at James, lifting his hand and blowing him a kiss. "Night, Jamie. I love you."

James pretended to catch it, before winking and replying, "I love you more."

**_April 24th — Emily: 9, twins: 2_**

At the moment, Kendall was kind of tired. Or every tired, and very stressed out.

"Shh, sweetie," he said soothingly, rubbing Emily's back as she threw up into the toilet, gagging and shivering. "It's okay . . ."

Emily had been diagnosed with what Kendall called stomach flu for a while now. Two weeks, to be exact. Not that anyone was counting . . . except Kendall. He'd been counting. The whole thing was a nightmare; he'd had stomach flu once or twice as a kid and it had never been this bad. All the fevers and the sneezing and the coughing and the stomach pains and the vomiting led to one huge nightmare for both Kendall and Emily. He could barely concentrate on feeding the two kids who could actually keep their dinner down, not to mention his work that he was seriously falling behind on. It didn't help that James was never around to help with anything.

Kendall himself had felt a bit strange before Emily got sick. But since he'd really only seriously thought about it in the last two weeks, he deemed it as his mind turning it into something it wasn't. He just continued with giving the twins their dinner and struggling to swallow any himself. He left James' portion in the microwave for him to heat it up when he eventually got his ass home. Though who knew how long that would take? He kept coming home late recently. To avoid the responsibility of taking care of his children, maybe? Or just to avoid Kendall?

Kendall waited until James eventually showed his ridiculously handsome face, acting as though this was a perfectly normal time to show up at. "Hi, James."

"Hi, Kenny." James grinned at him, pecking him on the lips. Kendall barely responded, and James misinterpreted it. "Emily's still sick, huh?" he asked, mouth drooped in disappointment.

"Well, duh. She didn't just spring out of bed and start singing and dancing around the house, did she?" Thought how the hell would James know, he wasn't even fucking there!

"Um . . . so . . ."

"She's still really sick," Kendall sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I'm worried about her, okay? That's all." Kendall turned to glare at James. "And where were you?!"

"Kendall," James relied slowly, frowning. "I was at work. You know, making a _living_, for my _family_?"

"Your work doesn't end this late!" Kendall snapped. Then he stopped. "Hold on. What are you saying?"

"What am I—"

"I'm making a living for my family," Kendall mimicked. "In case you haven't noticed, I'm doing plenty for this family, I'm the one cleaning up our daughter's vomit and giving her medicine every few hours!"

"I never said you weren't doing your bit for this family, stop putting words in my mouth!" James snarled, Kendall's condescending tone getting to him. "I was just explaining where I was, since you had to go all 'where were you for the past two hours' nutjob on me! What, do you think I'm having an affair or something now?! Is that what you think?!"

"I don't know, are you?! You seemed very quick to jump to that conclusion."

"You've got to be fucking kidding me, why the heck would I go off and do that? In case you haven't noticed I do kind of love you and have no interest in losing that—"

"Oh you don't?! Then what were your intentions the last time you ditched me?!"

James stopped. Kendall stopped.

"Wow . . ." was all James managed to say. "I . . . I guess I deserved that."

"No, no you didn't!" Kendall said frantically, eyes wide with horror. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say that!"

"I think you did . . ." James said numbly. "I'm sorry, Kendall . . ."

"No, I'm sorry! Jamie, please!"

James finally looked up again. Kendall grabbed his arm, eyes full of tears. James was startled out of being mad; he hadn't expected that. Surely Kendall didn't feel that guilty about it?

"I'm s-so sorry," Kendall wept. "I don't know what's gotten into me . . ."

"Babe, shh. It's okay." James wrapped his arms around him, holding his trembling husband close to his body in an attempt to soothe him. "Don't cry, please . . ." He tilted Kendall's chin up. "You're not getting sick too, are you?"

"I don't think so," Kendall hiccuped. "Well, I have been getting sick a little, but not like Emmy and I don't gave a fever . . . I think I'm just stressed. I'm sorry I lost my temper and turned into a psychotic monster, I'm just worried about her."

"I know, sweetie," James said soothingly. "She's your baby, it's understandable. You can't help getting upset over her being unwell."

Kendall sniffled, drying his eyes and trying to smile. "On the bright side," he said at last. "Her fever's gone down and she's not as stuck to the bed. She's just still throwing up."

"Look, it's just one of those things we have to let be," James said gently. "She just has to get better herself. There's nothing you can do except make her feel a bit more comfortable while doing it."

Kendall nodded at last, swallowing. "O-okay."

James smiled, kissing his forehead. "Good. Now go and get some rest, okay? I'll take care of Emily if she needs anything."

"No, you just came home from work—"

"I'm fine. Go, Kendall."

Kendall kissed James goodnight and reluctantly did as he was asked, going upstairs for a nap. James went upstairs and peeked into Emily's room. She was sitting up in bed, reading a book. She looked up, her brown eyes blinking at him sleepily. "Call me if you need anything, okay?" James said. She nodded and he left the room again, going to the kitchen to sniff out something to eat. He found the note Kendall had taped to the microwave and smiled to himself.

Throughout the evening, Emily needed things like a hot water bottle when her stomach hurt, or a glass of water, or just come company and comfort. It wasn't so much the work itself that was stressful, but the state their daughter was in. James could now see why Kendall had turned into a raging psychopath over it, if he'd been dealing with this for the past two weeks.

Emily was sick for at least another week, but eventually she stopped throwing up and she stopped staying in bed all day. Her biggest step to recovery was when she went outside to play a gentle game of soccer with her younger brother and sister. It gave Kendall the peace of mind he needed to get back to his daily routine, and finally do his work for James' magazine again. James, meanwhile, could concentrate on his writing and modelling without having to worry about any of his family members. It was a huge relief for all of them.

Then one evening a few days later, James came home from work to see Emily building Lego houses with the twins. "Dad's in the bathroom," she told him when he asked.

James walked upstairs into his room, putting down his bag and glancing at the closed bathroom door. "Hey, Kendall," he called. "I'm home. Now was your day?"

"Fine, it was fine . . . Hey, James?" Kendall called from the bathroom.

"Yeah?" James kicked off his shoes and pushed them under the bed, unbuttoning his shirt.

"I'm pregnant."

"You what?!" James' hand caught on a button. He winced and sprinted into the bathroom. "What?!"

Kendall, standing there completely nonchalantly, pointed to the three positive pregnancy tests sitting in the bathroom sink. "I'm pregnant."

". . . Oh."

"I decided to check, because even though Emily's been better for a while I haven't been completely myself, so . . . yeah." Kendall gave a nervous smile. "Well?"

"Babe, that's great!" James wrapped his arms around Kendall, kissing him. "I'm really happy, honestly. I'm just kind of surprised is all. Though I guess it explains all those moods."

"Trust me, so am I," Kendall chuckled. "So, I booked a checkup appointment for next week. You'll come, right?"

"Nah, I'll just let you fend for yourself. Ouch! I'm kidding, of course I'll go! As if I'd miss it!"

The following week, the two got out of the car and walked hand in hand into the clinic. Once it was their turn, the two hurried into the room and greeted the nurse with big smiles. What with Emily finally better, and another little Diamond on the way, they were over the moon.

"Nice to see you both again," the nurse smiled sweetly, taking out her equipment as Kendall sat down in the chair and lifted his shirt up. As usual, she rubbed the blue gel into his skin, and he hardly flinched. She rubbed the sensor over his belly and the fuzzy images began to appear on the screen. "So, when did you find out you were pregnant?"

"Just last week," Kendall replied, holding James's hand. "Thing is, I probably had the symptoms for a while but I didn't realise. My daughter's been sick so I was a bit stressed out . . ."

"I see. Okay . . ." The nurse studied the image carefully, moving the sensor slowly over Kendall's belly. "Judging by the size of the fetus, I'd say you're about six or seven weeks along . . ." Her voice died out, brow furrowed slightly. "Hmm . . ."

"Is something wrong?" James asked, frowning. He glanced at Kendall, who just looked slightly puzzled.

"I want to go have a word with Dr Collins," the nurse replied, putting down the sensor. She smiled at them. "Don't be worried. I'll only be a moment." Then she left the room.

"Jamie, you're squeezing my hand really hard . . ."

"Sorry." James loosened his hold. "I'm just kind of worried, what if something's wrong?"

"She said not to worry," Kendall said bluntly.

"But don't they always—"

"James, I'm sure nothing's wrong." The tone of Kendall's voice told James he needed to stop talking, immediately. Kendall looked away, biting his lip and pouting slightly.

"Good afternoon." Dr Collins had entered the room, nurse pattering along behind him. He smiled at the two men in greeting, walking over to the ultrasound machine, turning some knobs on it and picking up the sensor again. "So, Amy tells me you're at most seven weeks long? You didn't notice any symptoms?"

"I was a bit unwell," Kendall answered slowly. "But I thought it was because of stress."

"Stress?"

"Our daughter's been very sick for a couple of weeks, but she's better now . ."

"I see."

A few seconds of silence passed. Eventually James burst out, "Is something wrong?!"

"James!" Kendall snapped.

"What can you see?" James urged, ignoring him.

Dr Collins sighed. "Not something I see, but it is something that shouldn't be there at seven weeks, I'm afraid . . ."

"What?" Kendall choked, eyes widening. "What are you talking about?"

Dr Collins sighed, switching off the machine. He quickly wiped down Kendall's stomach and sat next to them on a stool. "Kendall," he said at last, sighing. "There's no heartbeat . . ."

Kendall and James just stared at him, both feeling completely numb.

"It's not entirely uncommon," Dr Collins continued. "This can happen in maybe 20% of pregnancies. Plus you've been under a lot of stress lately . . . it just happens. I'm sorry."

Whatever happened afterwards, Kendall didn't say a word.

"You know," James said at last, as they drove home from the clinic. "He said that if we wanna have another baby at some point, we can try again in a few months . . ."

Kendall stayed silent, looking out the window.

"You know . . . it's not your fault."

"But it is."

James turned to glance at Kendall: he hadn't expected to blonde to say anything. Kendall finally turned to look at him, tears dripping down his cheeks. His lip quivered. "I m-must have fine something wrong . . ."

"You didn't know you were pregnant, and you were worried about Emmy, we both were. It's nobody's fault."

"I know I shouldn't be so upset about it," Kendall continued softly. "Because it's not like we're losing our first kid . . ."

"You have every right to be upset," James reassured him, moving a hand over to intertwine it with his. "It'll be okay . . ."

Kendall just looked down, crying silently. When they got home, Katie took one look at them and immediately knew something was wrong. However, she thought it would be better not to ask, and told Kendall to go upstairs and rest for a while. "You can just tell the kids that he's tired," Katie said quietly to James. "I guess it's not a lie."

James was glad they hadn't told the children about the pregnancy; he knew explaining what had happened would break their hearts. So instead he cooked them dinner and they watched a movie together. After he sent them all to bed, he finally went to his and Kendall's room to see his husband. He found him curled up asleep on the bed, clutching a pillow close to his chest. James gently pried it from his hands and lay down next to him, holding him close and secure in his arms. Kendall snuggled into his chest and continued to sleep softly.

James had hoped that by the end of the week, Kendall would would be back to his old self. But he knew this was a high expectation and wasn't particularly surprised when Kendall was in the same state of depression. However, he'd been sure that after another week, he'd have some of his old bounce back. But he didn't.

And another two weeks passed. He still acted as he had before they found out about the baby. He read to the kids, he cooked for them, he cleaned, he played with them, he worked on his column. But outside of that, he did nothing else. He just sat and read quietly, speaking only when spoken to. He didn't smile much, not even for the children, and if he did, it never really reached his eyes. James would never have expected losing a baby he'd barely known about could've affected him so badly. It was worrying him. He wanted his old Kendall back, the one with the dimples and sparkly eyes and adorable laugh. He missed him like crazy.

Eventually, he decided that he had to do something, something drastic. Small sweet gestures weren't enough anymore. So he called his 'Mini Chief Advisor' as she'd named herself, and the two sat down in the kitchen to talk, while Kendall was upstairs giving the twins a bath.

"I'm really worried about Dad too," Emily sighed mournfully. "He's always so sad now."

"I know," James replied. "And I called you here because I wanted to get your opinion on my plan to try and help him get better."

"Tell me," she said eagerly.

"Well, his birthday is coming up soon, so it fits in well," James said to her. "And, I was thinking . . ."

"Yeah?"

"Maybe a puppy?"

"A puppy?" Emily's eyebrows rose. "You think that'll cheer him up?"

"Well, I dunno. That's the thing. But I've tried so many ther things and it's just . . . it's staring to really worry me." James paused. "But, think about it. Everyone loves puppies, especially Kendall. And it'd be a distraction for him."

"I guess so," his daughter replied thoughtfully, brow furrowed. She looked so much like Kendall when she did that, it was almost frightening. "Where will we get the puppy?"

"I was thinking the animal shelter that's just on the outskirts of town. He can pick a dog from there, and it'll be an abandoned one too so everyone's happy, know what I mean?"

Emily nodded, grinning. James could tell she was starting to get excited bout the idea of a dog in the house. "When will we bring him?"

"I think this weekend. I don't want it to be too close to his birthday either; I want him to be surprised."

Emily nodded. "Are you gonna tell Hannah and Adam?"

James chuckled. "I'm not sure they can keep a secret. I'll tell them the night before, I guess. Make them promise to stay quiet. I could give them some candy for the car trip, that might keep them silent."

Emily giggled, nodding in agreement. "So, we're getting a puppy?"

James nodded. "We're getting a puppy."

That weekend, James told the twins what he was planning. A threat from Emily ensured that they would stay silent. He'd checked the visiting hours for the shelter, and deemed everything ready when he walked into the kitchen that morning. He just prayed and prayed that it would all go well.

"Hey, Kendall."

Kendall looked up from where he was pouring out orange juice for the twins. The corners of his mouth rose in a slight smile. "Yeah?"

"We're going out today," James told him, keeping an eye on the twins as he spoke to make sure they didn't giggle. "To a surprise location. So . . ."

Kendall nodded. "I'll get dressed." As he finished giving the children their breakfast, he walked past James, gave him a small peck on the lips, and continued out of the room towards the stairs.

James got the children dressed and ready. "Okay," he whispered to them. "Are you ready to go get a new puppy?"

They all nodded eagerly and ran to put on their jackets. Kendall walked over to James and did the same. He wrapped his arms around James's middle and pressed a gentle kiss to his chin. "I'm sorry I've been so glum," he said quietly. "I've been trying to perk myself up . . ."

"Maybe today will help," James replied, grinning down at him. "Come on, let's get going."

They went down to the car. As soon as they all sat down and were safely strapped in, James took out a bandana and held it up. "Babe, I'm gonna blindfold you."

"Now I'm getting suspicious," Kendall said, cocking an eyebrow.

James just chuckled and tied the bandana over Kendall's eyes. "And now, off we go!"

James drove off through the town, turning on the radio and humming along in time to the latest overrated pop hit. Emily sang along for the chorus. Adam and Hannah tried, but most of their words didn't make sense. He just smiled at them encouragingly through the rearview mirror and let them continue. "How much further?" Kendall asked at last, glancing towards the window and then towards James.

"We've only been driving for fifteen minutes," James told him. "Another ten." Their surroundings were starting to get quieter. He spotted a sign for the animal shelter on the side of the road and smiled to himself, following the directions. Eventually, they drove down what he almost considered a bit of a dirt track, and he pulled into an available parking space. "Okay, we're here!"

Kendall moved to take the blindfold off, but James slapped his hand away before he could. "Not yet," he said sternly. "I'll take it off."

"Whatever," Kendall sighed, giving in and slumping down on the seat.

The children jumped out of the car, jumping up and down in excitement. James helped Kendall out of the car, wrapping an arm securely around his waist. "Okay. Just follow me."

"Do I hear barking?" Kendall asked slowly, looking around.

"I dunno, probably in a garden somewhere," James murmured, before leading him up to the front gate. A woman walked out to meet them, giving a bright smile. "Morning! Are you here to take a look around?"

"Yeah, we are," James replied, reaching out and shaking her hand. "I'm James, and this is my family. Kendall, Emily, Adam and Hannah." He pointed them all out before adding, "We're here to adopt." As he looked at the dogs in the nearby outdoor pens, he wondered how they were going to choose one. Or more, how Kendall was going to choose one, he was such an animal lover.

"Adopt?!" Kendall's mouth dropped open.

James just laughed and tugged the blondfold off. "I know it's early, but I wanted to surprise you and cheer you up. Happy birthday, babe."

Kendall looked around, eyes lit up in a way James hadn't seen since they'd gone to that damned doctors office. "Oh my god, Jamie . . . we're getting a dog?!"

"Well, yeah." James turned to the woman. "Have you got puppies here?"

She nodded. "Two litters, one of sheepdogs, one of alsatians. But most of the dogs here make good family pets."

"They're all so cute!" Kendall was squealing, petting a small terrier through a gap in the fence. "I just want them all!"

"Our house isn't big enough, I'm afraid. You're limited to one."

"Okay, I guess I can handle that . . ." Kendall straightened up and walked back to the woman. "So, can we see the puppies?"

The woman, who introduced herself as Becky, led them around to the pens at the back. Side by side were two large pens containing two litters of puppies. At the sight of visitors, they immediately scampered toward the fence, yapping and jumping up and down in excitement. Kendall, Emily and the twins all squealed. James just chuckled and smiled fondly.

"Can I go in?!" Kendall asked eagerly.

Becky nodded. "Any particular breed you fancy?"

Kendall pointed towards the alsatians and Becky opened the gate, letting him go in to greet them. The children watched him enviously as he knelt on the ground, the puppies leaping into his arms and licking at his face. Becky glanced down at the children and smiled sweetly, moving towards the sheepdog pen. "How about you three keep these little guys company while your dad picks one of the others?"

The children all shrieked with excitement and ran into the pen.

"Adam, stop pulling its tail!" James called worriedly. "Hannah, don't touch that!"

"I suppose it must be hectic, adopting so many children," Becky said to him a little sympathetically.

James nodded, deciding not to correct her. They'd learned that it was better not to.

"Think you'll ever adopt more?"

James shrugged. "I don't know. The thing is, we were going to. But the mother lost the baby about a month ago. Kendall was very upset about it, he's been in a bit of a slump ever since."

"So, that's why you brought him here?"

James nodded. "I thought it would cheer him up. I know how much he loves animals, and I thought the kids would like it too. If we ever do adopt another child, it certainly won't be for a while. Not until this whole thing has kind of cleared up, if you get what I mean."

"I do." Becky smiled fondly and watched Kendall cuddling one of the puppies in his arms. "Well, I can already see one of these little guys is gonna be going to a sweet, loving family."

"Aww," James joked. "What a nice thing to say."

"Jamie!"

James walked over to the fence where Kendall stood, holding a puppy in his arms. The little dog was nibbling at his jacket collar, one of its ears flopped over. "I like this one the best," Kendall giggled, scratching behind the dog's ear.

Becky walked over and opened the fence, letting Kendall out and taking the puppy from him. "This one's a boy. He's a real sweetheart, isn't he?"

Kendall nodded, beaming. He turned to where the children were still playing with the other dogs. "Should we get them out now?"

They did, and Becky said to them, "We've gotta get this guy ready to take home, so why don't you look around at the other dogs while you wait?" Then to her surprise, she handed the puppy to James. "If you take him around to the front door, they'll get him ready for you. Plus you can buy anything you want from us; a bowl, leash, collar, whatever."

"You okay with that, Jamie?" Kendall smirked slightly. "Think you can handle him?"

"Pfft, of course I can, he's tiny."

"I'll show your family around, then," Becky smiled. "Feel free to have a look yourself, James, once you've got everything sorted."

James carried the little puppy around to the front of the shelter. "Um, so . . . puppy," he said at last, glancing down at him. The little animal looked up at him with big brown eyes, tongue lolling out of his moth. He looked like he was smiling. It made James smile back. "You're gonna make Kendall happy, aren't you? You can do that for me, right?"

The puppy licked his cheek and nuzzled up against his chin.

"Good. I thought so."

He rang the bell at the front door and a cheerful looking man in a polo neck t-shirt ran to answer it. "Morning!" he greeted. "I'm Dave. Did Becky send you around?"

James nodded, holding out the puppy. "We wanna adopt this little guy, if that's cool."

"Not a problem!" Dave took the puppy and sat him on the counter, taking the little numbered collar off from round his neck. "If you like, you can buy him a new collar here. But we don't do licenses, I'm afraid."

"That's okay. A collar would be great." James listed out everything else he needed and paid for it, taking it all in a carrier bag.

Dave placed a piece of paper or him on the counter, hanging him a pen. "This is an adoption certificate. You'll have to sign your name, write the dog's name . . ."

"He doesn't have a name yet. He'll get one once my husband shows up; he's out looking around."

"Okay, how about you take a seat outside and wait for him?"

James did, sitting on one of the benches with the puppy on his arms. "This suits you," he commented, playing with the bright red collar around his neck. "Very smart. Might even get one for myself." Or Kendall. Hmm . . .

Now was not the time to be considering these things. Despite how awesome they were.

A few minutes later, he heard the children calling him in excited voices. Wondering why they sounded so hysterical, he looked up. His jaw dropped.

The children were sprinting around the corner towards him, shrieking random words he couldn't understand through their enthusiasm. But he got the message clearly when he was Kendall and Becky walking and talking to each other. Kendall held a leash in his hand, that was attached to a collar worn by one of the biggest dogs he'd ever seen. He was bulky and had long black fur, and was panting loudly. He was so tall that he reached Kendall's waist. "Um, Kendall," James said uncertainly as they got closer. "What is that . . .?"

Kendall gave him a sheepish grin. "It's a dog."

"Daddy's adopting him!" Adam shrieked, hugging the monster dog around its neck.

James gaped at Kendall. "You can't be serious!"

"Nobody wants him because he's so big," Kendall pleaded. "And because he's getting older and everyone always wants puppes. Please Jamie, just look at his face!"

James did, and sighed. The dog glanced up at him, seemingly unimpressed with him too. "He'll eat the puppy."

"No he won't!" Kendall gasped, horrified.

"Don't worry," Becky reassured James, patting him on the shoulder. "Monster's very passive, he won't do a thing."

"Then why is his name Monster?!"

"Pleeeaaaassseeeee!" four voices pleaded. And he was met with four pairs of— nope, make that five— gleaming puppy eyes and little whimpers. Then he realised that he'd brought Kendall here to cheer him up.

James sighed, and face palmed. The things he did for that manipulative blondie. "Fine."

Kendall cheered, hugging him and giving him a big kiss, before holding his arms out to Monster. The dog jumped up and licked at his face, paws on his shoulders. James frowned to himself. _Came to get a puppy. Got a puppy and a dog almost as tall as I am._

But he saw how happy Kendall was, and decided it was worth it. Besides, how much harm could a dog the size of a small cow who was named Monster do? Haha . . . ha.

Some paperwork and discussions later, and the family were back in the car. Monster was sitting on the floor in the back, head on Emily's lap. Kendall held the puppy in his arms, who he'd named Bailey. "I love you," he cooed, holding the puppy up in front of him and kissing his head. "Yes I do, I love you so much."

James shook his head fondly and drove home.

Bailey's things were set up in the kitchen, James laying out a few newspapers around on the surrounding tiles. "Just in case . . ." He then went through the cupboards and found a worn blanket and some old cushions from their old apartment. He arranged them on the floor for Monster to sleep on. "There, that should be comfortable!"

"What if they want to sleep with us?" Kendall asked innocently, still cuddling Bailey in his arms with Monster sitting by his feet.

James stared at him. "Babe, I have to draw the line somewhere . . ."

Kendall sighed, placing Bailey down on the floor. "Okay, fair enough." Then he hurried over to James and pulled him in for a kiss. "Thank you so much," he said softly, pressing their foreheads together gently. "I love you."

James grinned, hugging him close. "I love you more."

**_December 25th — Emily: 11, twins: 4_**

The first thing Emily always did when she woke up was crawl to the end of her bed, and look for her presents. A typical childlike thing, she knew. Presents from relatives or friends were left under the Christmas tree downstairs. But the presents from Santa were left on the ends of their beds. Well, to Hannah and Adam it was Santa. Emily knew who really left the presents on the end of the bed and in their stockings, and they were a lot more wonderful than some fat old man in a red suit.

Emily reached the end of the bed, reaching down to feel around for her present. She grasped it and eagerly picked it up. The wrapping paper crinkled against her fingers as she carefully tried to suss out what the present was. It was rectangular, and when she shook it she heard a faint rattling sound. Putting it down beside her, in the low light she reached for her red stocking with the fluffy white trimmings and picked it up. It was bulging. What 'Santa' liked to do every year was fill their small stockings with as many tiny presents as he could. Shaking the stocking, she could tell it was full of little tiny things. But she couldn't look yet, until they were all together as a family.

Suddenly, her bedroom door opened and a small head peeked inside. "Emily!" a voice hissed. "Are you awake?"

"Yeah, I'm awake."

The twins rushed in, carrying their presents and leaped onto the bed, squealing. "Look Emmy, my present is huge!" Adam crowed, struggling to hold the huge box as well as his little stocking. "I think it's the fire truck I wanted!"

"It's not yours," Hannah jeered. "It's mine. You don't get any presents this year because you're a baby!"

"Emmy!" Adam's lip quivered.

"Leave him alone, Hannah," Emily scolded, prodding her. Hannah scowled and poked back. So Emily grinned and tackled her onto the bed, tickling her. Hannah shrieked with laughter, trying to push her off. "Stop, stop it!"

Adam was cheering, jumping up and down on the bed and singing 'Jingle Bells' when he had the breath to.

The three children were so noisy they didn't notice the bedroom door opening again. "Kids," James mumbled, smiling tiredly at them. "Do you have to make so much noise?"

"Yes!" Adam replied incredulously. "It's Christmas! Where's Dad?"

"He's still half asleep. Why don't we go wake him up?" James smirked, and the children grinned back. "Come on, grab your presents and let's go."

They did as they were asked and ran out of the room, down the hallway to their parents' room. "DAD!" they screamed, stampeding in and leaping onto Kendall's sleeping figure.

Kendall shrieked, bolting up with wide eyes. "Huh?!" He blinked sleepily, rubbing at one eye.

"The kids wanted to open their presents," James explained, sitting down on the bed next to him and wrapping an am around him. "Merry Christmas, babe."

"Happy Christmas, Jamie," Kendall replied lovingly, pecking James on the lips and snuggling into his embrace.

"Blech," Hannah gagged. "Don't be gross."

"Don't call me gross, you rascal." Kendall grabbed Hannah and tugged her into his arms, kissing her rosy cheek. "Come on, aren't we going to open presents? Whose turn is it to get the ones from the tree?"

Three hands pointed at James, who sighed and stood up. "Don't start without me!"

The Diamonds' family tradition had always been that the presents from Santa, and from each other, were opened in their parents' room. After that, they'd generally go off and play with them while Kendall started to work on Christmas dinner, James sometimes giving a hand and sometimes too pre-occupied with keeping the children in tow. Kendall's mother, her husband John, Kendall's sister Katie and James' mother Brooke came over for dinner, when they would open those gifts and play games together. Then in the evening, Carlos and Logan normally stopped by for a while. Kendall and James had always loved that security of having a routine on Christmas Day. It was something they looked forward to. Though all the cooking sometimes stressed Kendall out a bit, he'd always been better at it than James, so he didn't complain.

"Okay," James announced, walking back into the room and sitting on the bed with his stack of presents. "Let's see . . . this one is for Emily, from me and Dad." He handed it over. "This one is from Hannah and Adam," which they'd bought with that usual Christmas allowance and parental advice, "Then there's Kendall's presents from me, from Emily and from the twins. Then my presents, and the twins'. There!"

And so the opening of presents began. Emily received a new set of paints and brushes from Santa, a dress from Kendall and James and flower hairpins from the twins. She knew instantly that James had picked out those last two; they were co-ordinated far too well for Kendall to have chosen them. Adam got the fire truck he wanted, along with a polar bear plushie from Emily, who'd bought both her siblings cuddly toys that year, and a kids hockey set from his parents. Though Hannah remarked that Adam was too wimpy for hockey, he seemed happy. Hannah's presents were a mermaid Barbie doll, a reindeer plushie, and a pair of purple shoes. Kendall must've picked those out; they were too sparkly and Hannah-like for James' refined style. She knew that much.

"Okay, now it's our turn," James said eagerly, picking up his first present, which was from Adam and Hannah which indirectly meant it was from Kendall, but neither of them said anything. "Hmm . . ." He gave it a little shake, smiling teasingly at the giggling twins. "I wonder what it could be." And he opened it to find a new kit of Cuda hair gel. James let out a gasp, eyes wide. "It's just what I wanted!" The twins beamed from ear to ear, glowing with pride. Next, James opened his present from Emily. She'd decided to make them their gifts, and had struggled for a week or two to knit James a patchy and colourful scarf, and a beanie for Kendall. However, James seemed happy and wrapped it around his neck. Then, last as always, he opened up the last gift from Kendall, to reveal some designer sweatshirt that he had bought for him. V-neck, of course. Kendall always said that James looked best in those. "Thank you, babe. I love it." He kissed Kendall lightly, ignoring the faces that the kids made at them.

"Now me," Kendall beamed, opening up his CD the twins had given him. James had no clue who the band was, even though he'd found the album himself; some hippie indie rock thing that Kendall loved. But what he saw in those artists, he would never know. He let out a delighted squeal when he opened Emily's present and placed it on his head, resting it so his bangs hung out like always. "I think you've got about a thousand beanies now, babe," James chuckled.

Kendall glared at him. "You can never have too many beanies." He then opened James' present; some John Green books that he'd been desperate to get his hands on.

The five of them cuddled in bed for a while, chatting while the children marvelled over their presents. But eventually Kendall got out of bed and said, "Okay, babies. Go get dressed, and I'll get started on dinner."

"I'll help!" James volunteered immediately, running out after him. "Bring your toys downstairs and play all you want once you're ready, okay?"

"If you like the sweater, you should wear it today," Kendall teased as they walked into the kitchen. "I love seeing you in v-necks."

"Oh yeah?" James grinned, standing closer to Kendall and pinning him against the counter, hands on either side of his waist. "How much?"

"So much it kinda turns me on a little," Kendall replied softy, closing the tiny distance between them and pressing his lips to James'. James kissed back eagerly, pressing his body up against the blond's. Only Kendall pulled back too soon and huffed out, "Okay, I've got to get started." He turned and started fumbling around, turning on the oven. "Gotta get the turkey in first . . ."

"We haven't got much to do though, right? Not a much as last year."

"Yeah, my mom is making mashed and roast potatoes, your mom is handling veggies and Katie's gonna make Mom's snickerdoodles for after. I've just gotta make stuffing, and cranberry sauce. And cook the bird, obviously. Then while it's cooking, I'm gonna make some cakes or something. And there's ice-cream in the fridge."

"We're gonna be busy," James chuckled, rolling back the sleeves of the baggy shirt he often wore to bed. "Okay, give me my first instructions."

The two worked at the food while keeping their ears open, ensuring the children were getting along and not causing any trouble with one another. Once they'd finished everything except take the turkey from the oven, they went off to shower and get ready. "I'm getting a little bit of pudge here," Kendall sighed, tapping his stomach. "Comes with age, I guess."

James —who still had the body of a god, naturally— gaped at him before shaking his head and saying, "Babe, you're not old. You're not even thirty yet."

"Pudge."

"You've had three children. Look, if it bothers you so much, come to the gym with me!

Kendall, the king of laziness, made a face. "You know what, I think I'm okay . . ."

It wasn't long after that when the visitors arrived, all squealing their greetings and giving huge hugs with the arms that weren't carrying presents. Katie, who was twenty-one now, was the last to arrive. "Sorry!" she said breathlessly, hanging up her jacket when she walked in. "I had to give Hunter a hand getting the stove to work, it's been acting up." Hunter was Katie's boyfriend, and they'd recently started living together. Kendall still ranted to James that it was too soon, she was too young, etc etc. Then James pointed out what Kendall had been doing when he was twenty-one and the blond clamped his mouth shut.

The eight of them sat down at the cramped kitchen table, the food already spread out in the centre. They stuffed themselves and chatted away, laughing and joking. Hannah kicked up a fuss when Kendall tried to make her eat some carrots —she prety just wanted to eat a plate of potatoes— but other than that, everything was fine. After dinner, Kendall gave Bailey and Monster a bowl of leftovers each, and they all settled down in the living room to watch some movies together.

Some time in the evening, when everyone was eventually gone home, Kendall changed out of what he claimed as his 'good clothes' and into some sweats and a t-shirt. Likewise, Emily took off her new dress in exchange for jeans and a t-shirt. They sat around and watched the kids play with their toys. "You know," Kendall said at last. "I'm tired. I'm gonna go to bed." He kissed all the children's heads, then James' lips. "Night, everyone." He went off upstairs, James watching him go.

He watched the kids playing for another while, but eventually he could see they were getting tired. They weren't playing anymore, just sitting and kind of staring at their toys blankly, half lying on the floor. Eventually, Emily couldn't keep her eyes open and the twins had fallen fast asleep. "Okay," James laughed softly, picking his two youngest up. "Come on, Emily. Bedtime."

James put the twins to bed, tucking them in carefully so he didn't wake them and kissing them goodnight. He kissed Emily goodnight too, and went off into his room. As he closed the door, he was surprised to see Kendall sitting up in bed and reading, rather than sleeping like he'd expected. "You're still up, babe?"

Kendall nodded and looked up, putting the book down. "Yeah. I couldn't sleep, I wanted to talk to you . . ."

"Oh." James frowned. "Am I in trouble?"

"No, no! Of course not!"

"Oh. Well, um." James cleared his throat, remembering the three remaining residents of the house were meant to be asleep. "Carry on."

"Jamie," Kendall said softly, standing up and walking toward him, wringing his hands. "I've been thinking a lot lately . . ."

"About what?"

"A baby. Well, our baby . . ."

"You mean the one we lost?" James said uncertainly, worried about upsetting Kendall again. It had been almost two years since that had happened, but he still wondered if he brought it up, would Kendall lapse into a depression again? He'd never mentioned having another child since then.

Kendall nodded, but James saw no trace of that usual sadness in his eyes. "I know we've been putting it on hold for a while. Well, I have. I was just scared the same thing would happen again. But I can see now that as long as we're careful, it can't happen. Right?"

James nodded slowly, before saying, "So . . .? Are you saying you want to start trying again?"

Kendall nodded, smiling eagerly, by slightly nervously too. "Yeah. I am."

James grinned, leaning down and kissing Kendall gently. "So, when do you want . . .?"

"Well," Kendall's smile widened, his arms wrapping around James' middle. "I don't really think there's a specific time we should start trying. We should just stop trying not to have one . . ."

James, safe to say, couldn't believe his luck. "So, now? No condom?"

"Yes James," Kendall chuckled, walking backwards towards the bed and sitting down.

James lunged at him, knocking the blond flat on his back. Kendall burst into laughter, muffling the sound by pressing his lips to James' neck. James groaned, holding Kendall's waist and lifting him up the bed so his head rested on the pillows. Kendall happily reached down and tugged his shirt off, James doing the same before leaning down and licking up Kendall's chest. Kendall giggled, hand threading through James' dark hair. "Shh," James hissed teasingly, lips brushing over Kendall's navel. "Don't wake the kids."

"You shush," Kendall quipped back, hips rocking up slightly as James's tongue slid over his hip. "Mmm, Jamie . . ."

James slid Kendall's pants down his thighs, tugging them off and dropping them onto the floor. He leaned in and mouthed at the tent in Kendall's boxers, the blond gasping loudly and tugging hard on James' hair. He breathed heavily, head thrown back against the pillow. James glanced up at him. Cheesy as it sounded, his blond hair spread on the pillow behind him looked a little like a halo. He told Kendall that, and the blond laughed before tugging James up and kissing him again, their tongues clashing as Kendall flipped them over and straddled James' waist. He scooted down and yanked James' remaining clothes off, the brunet's hard cock springing out. Kendall licked at it eagerly, before closing his lips around it and slowly swallowing it up. James moaned loudly, brushing Kendall's bangs from his forehead so the blond could look him in the eyes.

"God, Kenny," James growled, finger stroking down Kendall's cheek. "It's forever since you've done this."

Kendall lifted his head up, coughing a little. "That's why I'm not very good at it," he wheezed slightly, hand on his throat. "Maybe some other time . . ."

"Okay, I can deal with that," James chuckled, hands moving down to squeeze Kendall's ass as the blond crawled back up his body. He tugged Kendall's boxers down and slid a hand between Kendall's cheeks, rubbing and pressing against his puckered hole. Kendall whimpered, their noses bumping together as he gripped James' shoulders tightly. James slid two fingers inside at once, carefully scissoring them and leaving light kisses along Kendall's cheeks. "Sorry I'm going dry," he said softly. "I can get some lube if you—"

"We're all out anyway," Kendall dismissed, hips shallowly thrusting back against James' fingers as he pushed a third one inside. "Oh god . . . I already checked."

James grinned at him, rolling them over and trapping Kendall beneath his burly body. "How long have you been planning this?" He slid his fingers from Kendall's asshole and settled between his legs.

"I've been thinking about it for a while," Kendall replied breathlessly. "But I was on and off the whole time, I didn't decide properly until last night. I was looking at you, and all the kids and the dogs and I just kind of thought, what was the point of putting it off anymore? I'd love another baby, I know you would too. The twins are old enough that we and they can handle it. And I just kind of knew if I never decided to have another kid I'd just keep thinking about it, and regretting it . . ."

James shrugged, gripping the pale flesh of Kendall's thighs in his hands. "Good enough for me." Then he pushed inside, muffling the blond's loud moan with his lips and tongue. Keeping their mouths locked in a hard kiss, James began thrusting his hips, tapping off Kendall's prostate at every move. His hands wandered over Kendall's soft body, wanting and needing to touch him everywhere. Weak moans and gasps were heard every second their mouths parted, their eyes locked between kisses as James moved faster and harder.

James wrapped his hand around Kendall's dick and stroked it until he came to his climax, shuddering and coating their chests in cum. His hole constricted around James' cock and the brunet gave a low moan, filling Kendall up and painting his insides white. Kendall's legs dropped onto the bed weakly, James resting on top of him and weakly giving him a quick kiss and nuzzling into his neck. "Hopefully that made a baby," James whispered, moving to lie on his side as his arm looped around Kendall's waist.

"I don't think it's gonna happen that quickly," Kendall replied, giggling and kissing James on the nose. "And even if it does, we've still got nine months left to wait before he or she s born."

"Don't be a killjoy."

Kendall rolled his eyes, kissing James' lips next. "I love you."

James kissed back, wondering whether or not they should bother to get up and wrap the covers over them. "I love you more."

**_October 31st — Emily: 14, twins: 7_**

"Yeah, Jas, I'm still here," Emily said, slouched on her bed with her phone pressed to her ear. "Sure, I'd love to come! You know where Tom's house is, right? I've never been there . . . no, at that last party I couldn't go, remember? My parents had a date night and I had to babysit. But I'll be there this time. Mhm. What are you wearing?"

Emily rifled through her closet, sighing. "I haven't get anything as short as that. Maybe I can cut the ends off some old shorts . . . I'll call you in a little while."

As Emily hung up and tossed her phone onto the bed, she suddenly spotted two small children at the door. She sighed, eyeing her brother md sister with tired eyes. "What do you want?"

"I heard you talking," Hannah said immediately. "Are you going to a party?"

"So what if I am? It's none of your business, is it?"

"We're telling Daddy!" Adam said gleefully, before turning and sprinting down so the stairs with an exaggerated evil cackle. Hannah followed, squealing with laughter.

"Hannah, Adam!" Groaning in exasperation, Emily ran down after them and into the kitchen.

"Daddy!" Hannah shrieked, running over to the table. "Emmy's going to a party!"

James looked up from his magazine. "A party?" he echoed, frowning.

Adam nodded enthusiastically before bellowing, "A grown up party! With cut shorts!"

"Shut up!" Emily hissed at them. "Can't you ever keep the mouth shut?"

"You never told us you were going to a party, Emmy," James said, standing up. "You said you were going to sleep over at Jasmine's house."

"It's not a total lie," Emily admitted at last.

James smiled brightly, clapping his hands together. "Well, guess what! Now you can stay here with us, and go trick-or-treating!"

"_What?!_ Dad, no!"

"Yes!" James replied, smile widening. "Happy Halloween! You can sort out this candy to give to the kids calling over." He pointed at the bags of candy and empty bowls that littered the kitchen table. "I was supposed to do it but . . . now I'm off to help Kendall with the costumes for our little monsters." He pinched the twins' cheeks and walked off and out of the kitchen, calling over his shoulder at his oldest, "No dawdling!" Her groan followed him and the smaller children up the stairs.

"Kendall!" he called, walking down to the bedroom at the end of the hall. "How are you doing?"

"I'm almost done!" Kendall called back. James and the twins walked into the room. Kendall was kneeling in the middle of the floor, some thread between his teeth as he sewed along a hem of Cathy's Halloween costume. The little girl was almost two years old, and beaming proudly as Kendall finished adjusting the shop-bought pumpkin costume so it fit her right. She had long blond hair and big green eyes, the spitting image of Kendall. "That's a Knight, through and through," was the first thing James had said when she'd been born. They'd been overjoyed at having her.

"There!" Kendall grinned, picking up the pumpkin hat and placing it on her head. "All done! Jamie, isn't she just the most adorable thing?" He wrapped his arms around Cathy and kissed all over her cheeks, and she squealed in delight, hugging him.

"She is adorable," James smiled lovingly, bending down and hugging them both, kissing Cathy's forehead. He pulled back and said, "Where are the twins' costumes? I can help them with theirs."

"On the bed in Hannah's room," Kendall answered, picking Cathy up with ease and resting heron his hip. "Come on, let's go get them. You can handle the face paint, you know I'm useless with it . . ."

James and Kendall dressed Hannah and Adam in their Halloween costumes; Hannah wore a black dress with a tutu and fairy wings, striped tights and a hairband with bat wings on top of her dark hair, complete with a sparkly wand. James painted her face white, with black lips and little cracks across her cheeks, as she'd requested. Adam had wanted something much easier to manage, to their relief. "I wanna be Spiderman, Daddy!" And he was now all kitted out in his costume, complete with a mask.

"You both look fantastic," Kendall grinned at them. "You can go downstairs and wait for us in the living room, okay? Take Cathy with you."

The twins hurried out with their baby sister safely walking between them, and Kendall took James' hand, leading him into their shared room. "So, Jamie," Kendall grinned, winding his arms around James' neck and pecking his lips. "Planning on dressing up at all?"

"Nah, I don't think so," James chuckled, gently thumbing the skin under Kendall's shirt. "I figured I'd leave it to the kids and their wild imaginations."

"Oh. Well." Kendall took James' hand, playfully messing with his fingers as he led him towards the closet. "You know, I've got a costume. But I think I should probably wait until we're back here to put on on."

"Ooh." James smirked. "Do you wanna show me?"

Kendall laughed, opening the closet and digging around, until he finally pulled out a plastic packet with a large label on the front. "I've already opened it and tried it and stuff, but this is basically what it looks like on."

James groaned at the sight of the Rocky Horror Picture Show costume Kendall had bought. Kendall had always had a strange obsession with that movie; every time they showed it back in Minnesota he'd try to rope either James, Carlos or Logan to go with him and if they wouldn't, he'd go by himself, dressing up and partying with the rest of those strange cultish enthusiasts. However, James wasn't complaining about this one. Kendall had bought a Rocky costume, which really just consisted of a pair of tight and shiny good shorts. That, he could live with.

"You'll watch it with me later, right?" Kendall asked hopefully.

"If you're wearing that, I can manage."

"Yay!" Kendall put the costume away again and grabbed James' hand, leading him towards the door. "Okay, let's take our three little monsters out to get some candy."

"Four, actually," James corrected. "Em was trying to sneak off to a party, so she's coming with us now."

"Oh." Kendall frowned for a second, then shrugged. "Okay. No point in nagging her about it."

The two walked downstairs to find Emily sitting on the couch, texting with a pout on her face. Cathy was sitting on the floor, watching the twins with wide fascinated eyes as they acted out what they'd dressed up as. James loved to see them interact with her like that. "Okay, kids," Kendall announced. "Ready to go?"

"Yes!" three voices squealed. Emily gave an unenthusiastic grunt and got to her feet.

Kendall held Cathy's hand securely in his as they walked down the street, littered with pumpkins and black streamers and kids running around in their costumes. The last thing he wanted was her getting distracted amd wandering off somewhere. James walked behind the twins, keeping a close eye on them. Emily sloped along behind them, hands in her pockets. "This is so unfair," she muttered. "So bloody unfair."

"Don't complain, Emmy!" Kendall called back to her as they neared their next house. "If you'd just told us about this party we might have let you go."

"It's not even a big deal!" Emily whined. "It's just a party, I bet you both went to parties when you were fourteen!"

"Well, James did." Kendall rolled his eyes. "You can talk to him all about it."

"Thanks for shoving me under the bus," James retorted. "Really, I appreciate it."

Kendall glanced over his shoulder at them, eyelids fluttering slightly. "Sweetie," he said, lips pouted and eyes large. "I love you."

And even Emily couldn't help smiling when James visibly melted and replied instantly, "I love you more."

_**August 25th — Emily: 19, twins: 12, Cathy: 7**_

"Does this really have to happen?" Kendall pleaded to his husband sitting in the driver's seat. "Can't we turn the car around?"

James shook his head, giving Kendall a fond but slight exasperated smile. "No, you know we can't."

Kendall gave a mournful sigh, slumping back in his seat. The whole family were in their seven seater car, with Cathy and the twins in the middle and Emily in the very back, some bags on the seat beside her. They were going to drop her off at her university, or as Kendall had been muttering for the last week, "the child stealer. It turns them into drunk and nutty college kids, I'm telling you!" James only rolled his eyes and patiently told Kendall that college was a good thing. Neither of them had gone, of course, so what did Kendall really know about it? It was just his parental instincts taking over as usual, and his impending grief of having their oldest child missing from the house.

"I just saw a sign," Adam spoke up, looking out the window. "It said half a mile to go."

Kendall glanced briefly in the mirror at his four children, smiling wistfully. They'd all grown so much. Cathy was engrossed in her Nintendo DS, fingers jabbing frantically at the buttons, her dark eyebrows furrowed (yes, she even inherited slightly more dainty versions of Kendall's monster brows). Hannah was listening to her iPod, head leaning against the window as her hand idly played with her dark braided hair. Adam was looking out the window with eagerness in his wide brown eyes. Then there was Emily, her wavy blonde hair laid over her shoulder, just lost in thought. They were all so beautiful. He had to look down and play with his jacket zipper so nobody saw how badly he wanted to cry.

"We're here."

Kendall looked up, startled. They were driving in through the front gates, James following the signs carefully so he could see where he was supposed to park. When they did, it was all he could do not to steal the car keys and lock them all in the car, laughing evilly and trapping them there for eternity. But everyone else got out of the car, so he did too.

James lifted the bags from the car trunk and stood them beside Emily." There you go."

"Thanks, Dad." Emily looked at them all, standing in a row and watching her. "So," she said at last. "This is it."

"You have to tell me about any cute college boys you meet," Hannah teased.

"And what the parties are like," Adam said quickly.

Kendall wanted to collapse.

"I will." She hugged them both in turn, exchanging goodbyes. Then she went to Cathy, picking her up and spinning her. Cathy laughed loudly, hugging around Emily's neck with her small arms. "Love you, Emmy."

"Love you too, Cathy." She kissed the little girl's cheek, setting her down. "Don't let those two idiots boss you around."

"I won't," Cathy promised, squaring her shoulders as Hannah and Adam both scowled playfully at her.

Then Emily went to Kendall, who immediately grabbed her and pulled her forward. She smiled affectionately for her silly overemotional father, who was crushing her a bit. But she didn't complain.

"Bye, sweetie," Kendall snuggled, hugging her tightly. "Have a good time, okay?"

"Okay, Dad," Emily replied, smiling and hugging him back.

He held her tighter. "And . . . and don't do anything stupid, okay? And don't forget to call us and remember all your assignments and—"

"Dad." Emily squirmed out of the hug, holding his hands. "Listen. I'm gonna be fine, okay? And of course I'll call."

"Every day?"

"No, Dad." Emily gave an exasperated laugh, shaking her head. "I have to have a life too, you know."

"Every week, then?!" Kendall pleaded.

"Of course."

"Okay." Kendall took in a few slow breaths, calming himself down and managing a smile. "Okay . . ."

Emily grinned at him, before moving on to the last person. "Bye, Dad," she sad softly, hugging him.

"Bye, Emmy," James whispered, clinging onto her. For god's sake, he'd promised himself that Kendall would be the weeping one, not him! But he let a tear or two fall anyway, because really, what did it matter?

When Emily left his arms, he just wanted to pull her back in. But he let her step back, holding her large suitcase in one hand and a duffel bag in the other, a handbag slung across her shoulders. "So, I'll see you guys soon," she told them. "I'm gonna to go the main office by myself, if that's cool."

"Okay," Kendall said, drying his eyes and nodding quickly. "Be safe."

As she headed up the steps towards the doors, Kendall shrieked out, "We love you!"

"I love you more!" she called over her shoulder, waving and blowing a kiss. Then she turned and headed inside, disappearing from view.

Somehow Kendall found James' hand and gripped it tightly, pressing their bodies together. James wrapped an arm around his waist, holding him close.

"Should we go home now?" Cathy piped up.

"Y-yeah, I guess we should . . ." James pulled himself together. "Okay, back in the car."

The three children hopped into the car. "I bet when we get back, Hannah's gonna go straight for Facebook," Adam cackled, trying to brighten up the atmosphere. "So she can gaze longingly at pictures of—"

"I do not have a crush on Joshua! Shut up!"

"I was gonna say Zack, actually. But who's Joshua?!"

Hannah covered her face and turned away, cheeks bright red.

James chuckled, starting the engine. He looked over at Kendall to see the blond's gaze focused on the school doors, a few tears trickling down his cheeks. "Hey," James said softly, reaching out to wrap a comforting hand around his. "I love you."

Kendall looked up at him, managing a wobbly smile. "I love you more."

**And there you have it :) thank you guys for reading!**


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